Sunday, October 14, 2018

Kills of the Week

No permit, no ship. Comply or die.

These are words of wisdom--words to live by. Those who reject wisdom in favor of bot-aspirancy get wrecked, like these Goofuses from the week of October 7th @ 00:00 EVEtime through October 13th @ 23:59 EVEtime:



I think we can all agree that this is not the best way to use a frigate. Yet Zenic Pyro voluntarily equipped a frigate with precisely three cargo expanders, undocked, and went on autopilot with 2.6 billion isk worth of cargo. Agents Lisa Tancos and Theodor Tancos gave Zenic some constructive criticism in their usual manner.


Don't do drugs, kids. And bot-aspirancy is a helluva drug.



What happens when you undock a 20 billion isk Bowhead and send it into Uedama? xNicux must've known the answer, but he didn't care. He didn't care about permits or the Code or anything else. Luckily, xNicux's fate wasn't up to xNicux. Instead, the will of the people spoke powerfully against him, from a gank armada with 60 members!

Agents Jason Kusion, Taxman Daniel, Tax Collector HongMei, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector Aruka, Justin Kusion, Tax Collector Kittens, Jayson Kusion, Tax Collector Max, Joseph Kusion, Jake Kusion, Tax Collector AynRand, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Pod Destroyer Molly, Jayden Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Tax Collector BokChoy, Joel Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Tax Collector Yuna, Jacob Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Johanthan Kusion, Tax Collector Larry, Tax Collector Alison, Tax Collector Kimi, Josh Kusion, Tax Collector Fuemi, Tax Collector Shardani, Jeremy Kusion, Jonas Kusion, Tax Collector Hill, Benji Rackner, Jack Kusion, Tax Collector Stroheim, Jeffery Kusion, Georgia Rackner, Jimmy Kusion, Jani Rackner, Jessie Kusion, Ashlee Rackner, Josiah Kusion, Rebecca Rackner, Shadow01 OMEGA, Jemma Rackner, Emily Rackner, Kirra Rackner, Yan Rackner, eviserater Adoudel, Olivia Rackner, Zoe Rackner, Celestia Rackner, Australian Excellence, Charlotte Rackner, Ivy Rackner, Kimberly Rackner, Globby Rackner, holdmybeer, Ding Dong MingMong, and HSM Vice Admiral reflected the popular opinion of highsec when they killed that Bowhead.



Fortis spiritus chose to pilot a Skiff instead of a Hulk. That was where the good news ended for Fortis, however. The miner failed to purchase a mining permit, and he showed extreme recklessness by indulging in bling. Agents Max August Zorn, Ernst Steinitz, Augustus De Morgan, and Niels Henrik Abel took him down. The Umokka system responded thusly:


Highsec shows little sympathy for Code violators these days.


Hearts and minds.



Consider the tale of 237 Mining and Production corp. They were wardecced and had their 5.6 billion isk engineering complex blown up by Agents Hulk Poddington, Skiff Poddington, and JF Poddington. Just prior to the destruction of this structure, the offending corp sent our heroes the following:


Judging by the destruction of the Raitaru, this offer was rejected. Agent Lawrence Lawton explains:


CCP may have allowed these botters to escape punishment, but our Agent did not. Once again, the wardec mechanic proved its value.



Para Moufas disgraced herself and her ship. Incredibly, she did this in Uedama. Justice is especially swift in that system. This time, it was delivered by Agents Aiko Danuja, Jake Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Justin Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Joel Kusion, Josh Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Jeremy Kusion, Jacob Kusion, Jonas Kusion, Jack Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Jessie Kusion, Jimmy Kusion, Josiah Kusion, Jeffery Kusion, and Jason Kusion.


Now let's talk about pods. This was a big week for 5 billion isk pods. The most expensive was a 5.7 billion isk pod that belonged to xNicux, the guy with the 20 billion isk Bowhead. We've said enough about him, though, so his pod won't be featured as the Podkill of the Week. Our Agents also ganked a 5.6 billion isk pod and a 5.3 billion isk pod this week. And now for one more:


GemBi was mining away in Kamio--historic Kamio!--when his Hulk was obliterated by Agent Ernst Steinitz.


Implants worth 5.69 billion isk were destroyed. A bit less than an hour later, the AFK miner finally awoke from his slumber and sent our Agent a message.


GemBi wasn't happy. He wasn't particularly coherent, either.


When reminded of his obligation to obey the Code, GemBi cursed our Agent. (Don't worry about carebear curses; they're as harmless as the miners who cast them.)


GemBi falsely claimed that it was "difficult" for him to acquire his 5.69 billion isk implants. Time-consuming, maybe, but grinding isk isn't difficult. Difficulty is better measured by how many people are capable of doing it. Creating a civilization--now that's a challenge. Few have the strength or the skill. Worry not, though: Our Agents can teach you!

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