Tuesday, December 31, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 27

Previously, on MinerBumping... aiva naali was out of patience. After months of waiting to be granted his security clearance, aiva demanded to be allowed into the Imperium. But first he would need to leave Conoco., a large Russian corporation that he belonged to for some reason. However, aiva's departure drew the attention of Ygritte Pava.

aiva was eager to be granted access to Goon space. Upon insisting that Agent Aiko Danuja give him an invite to Goonswarm Federation, aiva was unexpectedly contacted by a member of the Russian corp he'd abandoned.

Now aiva's full attention was diverted to dealing with this new problem. For Aiko, the timing could not have been better.

aiva's friends in the New Order--also serving as liaisons to Imperium High Command--might have assumed that aiva was entirely preoccupied with developing secret weapons and earning money for supercaps. But it seemed that aiva had a bit of a double life.

The circumstances surrounding the convo invite from Ygritte, a.k.a. "nina", were also suspicious. Indeed, one might be tempted to ask whether Ygritte was in league with Aiko herself. Wheels within wheels!

Ygritte confronted aiva. But the aspiring Imperium flagship pilot refused to sell out the Goons. No one must know his true plans until he was safely ensconced in Goon space.

Although Ygritte seemed to know more than she was letting on, aiva wouldn't budge. He could not allow his former corpmate to know of his secret identity. Pandemic Horde might have spies among the Russians.

Ygritte didn't buy aiva's excuses for leaving the corp. She claimed to have eyes and ears everywhere. Was she a member of the New Order, too?

aiva played the part of the innocent miner who didn't invent secret weapons for the Imperium. Surely a Russian corp with thousands of members wouldn't miss him. Ygritte demanded that aiva return to the corp, though. If aiva agreed, it would certainly take pressure off of Agent Aiko.

In his private conversations with Aiko and friends, aiva presented himself as totally loyal to the Imperium. To Ygritte, he showed a different side: He had his own agenda and would link up with anyone who would help him achieve his objectives.

After being a member of Conoco., aiva was used to dealing with Russians. He didn't speak Russian, but he could tell that Ygritte sounded like one.

Despite Ygritte's pleas and threats, aiva was determined the leave the corp. His future was with Goonswarm, come what may.

Finally, after several rounds of Ygritte's abuse, aiva let his mask slip. This was no ordinary miner.

aiva was, in fact, the most dangerous man in nullsec--though technically he lived in highsec. aiva had the ability to destroy any alliance or coalition. Even the Imperium was at his mercy; he could dismantle it in the same amount of time that it would take him to build a digital camera. So if Aiko Danuja had any intention of double-crossing him, there would be hell to pay.

To be continued...

Monday, December 30, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 26

Previously, on MinerBumping... Each day, aiva naali more fully integrated himself into the Imperium's command structure--and its ruthless endgame culture.

Impatient and ambitious, aiva frequently used Skill Injectors to gain the ability to fly bigger and more powerful ships. When called upon to fund the construction of such ships, however, aiva gathered money by extracting those very same skillpoints.

Luckily for aiva, it was not necessary to scrape together 12 billion isk all at once. The Imperium's shipyards accepted installment payments.

The downside was that all of the installments made for a much more complicated transaction. One needed a mind like aiva's just to keep track of it all.

aiva dutifully extracted and sold off the skillpoints he had purchased a week earlier--and then some.

Though aiva was a miner by trade, he was willing to give all that up in order to fast-track his Nyx. Once he was at the helm of a supercarrier, he could make isk by ratting in nullsec.

...But this raised the question of how aiva would gain access to nullsec ratting space. Despite his prominent position in the Imperium, he was currently a member of Conoco., a very large Russian corp with a dubious reputation.

aiva saw no further profit in belonging to a highsec corp. It was time to join Goonswarm Federation. Long past time, really.

Things were moving quickly now. aiva prepared his journey to the Keberz system, one jump from the entrance to southwestern nullsec.

Since Keberz is a highsec system, aiva could safely park there until his long-awaited invitation to Goonswarm arrived in the mail.

Within minutes, aiva was in Keberz and expecting his invite to Goonswarm. And he was growing impatient.

aiva politely but firmly asked Agent Aiko Danuja yet again to hand him the keys to nullsec. There was no possible excuse for any further delay.

...But then something unexpected happened.

While waiting in Keberz, aiva was contacted by Ygritte Pava, his former corpmate from Conoco. Ygritte had learned that aiva abandoned the corporation. And she demanded an explanation.

To be continued...

Sunday, December 29, 2019

Kills of the Week

Bot-aspirant carebears can be stubborn. They're creatures of habit, to be sure--they rely on routines and subroutines. Yet our Agents are able to rescue many of them. How? By jolting them out of their ruts. A good gank can do wonders. Here are a few good ganks from the week of December 22nd @ 00:00 EVEtime through December 28th @ 23:59 EVEtime...

If you look closely, you'll see some specks of purple in Marcel Sweetin's Paladin. All of that bling bloated his ship to nearly 10 billion isk. By now, everyone should know that purple mods are not permitted in highsec. Agents Votre Dieu, Rungerd, Narl' Amhar, Astrid Tyrfing, Artem Ice, and Ingrid Scylding enforced the Code and made a bunch of money--a win-win!

Victoire 'Vic' Beretton didn't quite live up to her corp's name: Intense Defense Tactics. This carebear barely had enough hitpoints to cover herself. Incredibly, she was carrying 5.4 billion isk in that busted-up old thing! A single Agent, NoPower Solutions, was able to reset the carebear's net worth to zero.

Cry Alf had a bad habit, and its name was "ORE". Agents Max August Zorn, Niels Henrik Abel, Felix Hausdorff, Augustus De Morgan, and Ernst Steinitz quickly located Cry Alf's 388 million isk Procurer and confiscated the ORE Ice Harvesters, both of which dropped.

In fact, the miner enjoyed the ORE Ice Harvesters for less than two hours before he was discovered; our Agents had sold the modules to him as part of a sting operation. Cry Alf's alt was caught 20 minutes later in a 386 million isk Procurer which hid its own pair of illegal ORE Ice Harvesters in the cargo bay.

Miners, take note: We are watching you.

Ah, the highsec jump freighter. So many have died in Uedama. Faultless Starch's blank-tanked 9.1 billion isk Nomad was executed in a traditional Kusion family ceremony. Agents Jason Kusion, Jacob Kusion, Jeremy Kusion, Josh Kusion, Jonas Kusion, Jeffery Kusion, Jimmy Kusion, Josiah Kusion, Jessie Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Jack Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Jake Kusion, Justin Kusion, and Joel Kusion put the AFK carebear to death. 'Tis a noble tradition.

Wozzlebatneoclone Breau made at least a little effort to protect himself while mining. He purchased a Skiff hull and equipped a few shield modules. But he couldn't resist the temptation to equip ORE Strip Miners. Before Wozzlebatneoclone knew what was happening, Agents Max August Zorn, Felix Hausdorff, Niels Henrik Abel, Ernst Steinitz, and Augustus De Morgan were hot on his trail. They eliminated the Skiff and its billion isk pod. Like I said, our Agents are always watching. Especially if you purchase expensive mining equipment from Jita.

Trrain was autopiloting in a simple rookie ship one day when he encountered Agent Stop Autopiloting. Trrain's rookie ship was popped, and then the Agent detonated the 3.1 billion isk worth of implants that Trrain carried in his head. I wonder what sort of excuse Trrain had for being ganked while autopiloting by someone named Stop Autopiloting. "Nobody gave me a warning"?

Crystal sets have been getting smashed at an alarming rate. Have the carebears forgotten who owns highsec?

Saturday, December 28, 2019

Tugging at the Hems of Power, Part 10

Previously, on MinerBumping... Tug Industries Corporation was in a state of utter confusion and disarray after being defeated by Agent Kalorned over and over again. Suddenly, one of the local miners had an idea: Kalorned must submit himself to a duel. The outcome of the duel would determine the fate of the Gamis system.

zandar Melkan was determined to be the man who would take on Kalorned in honourable 1v1 combat. Until Kalorned agreed to the duel, zandar would camp him in the station.

Unfortunately, zandar and the rest of the miners still suffered from a lack of intelligence. zandar "camped" the station while Kalorned was out bumping miners.

The fact was that Kalorned's bumping Orthrus was too slippery for the miners of Tug Industries. The Agent came and went as he pleased.

It became apparent that zandar's plan to force Kalorned into a duel had a serious flaw: There was no way to make him participate. The miners would need to talk him into it.

zandar hoped to pressure Kalorned by questioning the Agent's legendary courage. It didn't work.

Then the miner invoked Kalorned's ancestors. But zandar hadn't done his research.

Maybe it was the Agent's Orthrus that made him invincible. Perhaps a member of Tug Industries could get an Orthrus of his own and counter-bump Kalorned?

...Oops. Folg3r Tinlan had an active kill right due to his botched suicide attack against Kalorned using a Cynabal earlier that day.

The miners were horrified to see Kalorned (and a friend) triumph over them yet again. But zandar Melkan was not Folg3r. If only zandar could get his duel...

Alas, 'twas another tragedy. For some reason, zandar thought he could suicide gank Kalorned. It cost him his battleship and all hope of victory against the indomitable Agent.

Kalorned casually inspected the wreck. As he did so, he reflected upon all of the ships that the miners had thrown away in their failed gank attempts. And carebears say ganking is easy!

An impartial witness pronounced the final verdict on the day's events. Kalorned had been completely victorious. The miners would need to find a way to adapt to life under New Order rule.

To be continued...

Friday, December 27, 2019

Tugging at the Hems of Power, Part 9

Previously, on MinerBumping... The miners of Tug Industries Corporation grew angry and frustrated after repeatedly losing battles to Agent Kalorned. As they struggled to understand why they were failing so badly, some of the carebears found a scapegoat: a random miner named zellbob.

The atmosphere was thick with hostility. As time went on, the mob grew increasingly convinced that zellbob was to blame for Kalorned's presence.

Agent Kalorned could only stand by and watch as zellbob was condemned by his own silence--once again proving the perils of being AFK.

As for Kalorned, he maintained his innocence while bumping miners away from the ice they craved.

Our Agent tested the miners by claiming that he was not associated with any ganking activities. They didn't believe him. Yet they failed to take the obvious next step: Get right with the Code to avoid being ganked.

Suddenly, Folg3r Tinlan had an epiphany: zellbob had lived in the Gamis neighborhood for years. Maybe his presence wasn't so closely correlated with Kalorned's after all?

Folg3r came to believe that the zellbob conspiracy theory--which his fellow miners had started--was actually part of Kalorned's elaborate scheme to divide and conquer the Gamis system. But Folg3r's corpmate Killxone was still certain of zellbob's guilt.

Agent Kalorned surveyed the scene from his perch in the ice anomaly. The area had become quiet and clean while the miners sat in a station and argued amongst themselves.

The zellbob matter still unresolved, Gold Fingure felt it was a good time to negotiate with Kalorned for access to the ice anomaly.

Unfortunately for Gold Fingure, the Tug Industries pilots lacked leverage: Kalorned had the power of the Code, and they did not.

Thanks to their infighting and general incompetence, Tug Industries lacked a suitable intelligence network. They were at a loss to keep track of Kalorned's movements. Was he in the ice anomaly or docked up?

Finally, zandar Melkan stepped forward with a plan to untie the Gordian knot: He would duel Kalorned for the right to live in Gamis.

The miners all agreed that a duel was the only fair solution. It was settled, then. 'Twould be a fight to the death.

To be continued...