Tuesday, October 22, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 7

Previously, on MinerBumping... Ambitious miner anaCheeya ANARKY biomassed himself and was reborn as aiva naali. He hoped to get his null sec nomads corp accepted into Goon space. Scratch that--he hoped to get his null sec nomads corp, period. For the corporation was held in trust by some friends until a series of security checks were performed. Said security checks were vital, too, as it turned out the miner was more dangerous than anyone imagined.

anaCheeya/aiva had given most of his worldly possessions to his new friends. In the meantime, he was determined to rebuild. He managed to progress from losing Ventures to losing Retrievers. Still, he was stuck in highsec.

Ironically, he was ganked by members of Goonswarm Federation. They must have stumbled upon him by luck.

While the security checks continued, aiva kept busy by coming up with improvements for his "skank trap" concept. Once perfected, it could alter the balance of power in nullsec.

One way or another, aiva managed to get his hands on some new ships. But this meant that aiva's friends needed to take possession of them.

Agent Aiko Danuja agreed to look after aiva's stuff while things got sorted out with the Goons.

aiva considered himself an expert trader. True to form, he manged to strike a fair deal with Aiko.

But there was more. In addition to the "skank trap", aiva had an even more intriguing--and deadly--project in the works.

Although carriers have long been used by nullsec alliances for both PvP and PvE, aiva managed to see what everyone else had missed.

"Project Muse" would be aiva's most powerful invention yet. The unassuming highsec miner was about to be crowned EVE's greatest theorycrafter.

Despite his paltry in-game income, aiva had some expensive tastes. In particular, he was addicted to skill injectors. aiva's friends had their concerns, but they didn't ask questions.

As anaCheeya, the miner had called himself the "kingpin". As aiva, he was "lil bullet". This was a miner in a hurry to prove himself. And he was about to amaze Agent Aiko with his speed and cunning.

Then again, lil bullet's fast-paced lifestyle couldn't last forever.

To be continued...

Monday, October 21, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 6

Previously, on MinerBumping... anaCheeya ANARKY found himself tied up in red tape. Hoping to bring his null sec nomads corporation into Goon territory, anaCheeya was thwarted by the Goons' security checks. In a desperate bid to regain control of his corp, anaCheeya biomassed himself and was reborn as aiva naali.

The future didn't look so bright for anaCheeya/aiva. He yearned to command Rorqual fleets in the heart of nullsec. But for now, he was stuck mining rocks in highsec with a Venture. Until the Venture was ganked, anyway.

The first step in anaCheeya's comeback plan was to get his corp back. Unfortunately, Agent Kalorned required a fee of 500 million isk to return the corp prior to the completion of a background check.

anaCheeya didn't like all of the bureaucracy; nomads have no need of such things. But the Imperium does.

If nullsec was all about layers of bureaucracy and endless paperwork, then maybe anaCheeya needed to change his plans.

On the other hand, the miner knew that nullsec was where the best ore was to be found. Greed overtook him.

In any event, a mere 500 million isk was nothing compared to the riches that would become available once Imperium space was opened to him.

And so anaCheeya decided to comply with the latest set of instructions. Hopefully it would be the last time he'd be required to hand over his isk.

Although it seemed like anaCheeya was spending weeks sitting around doing nothing, he was actually putting his time to good use. After studying the map of the EVE galaxy, anaCheeya discovered fatal weaknesses in the most powerful empires of nullsec.

Armed with a suspiciously high volume of skillpoints and a little bit of cartography, anaCheeya now knew how to use a relatively small fleet to destroy the Imperium. This made the ambitious miner more dangerous than Pandemic Legion and the rest of the Goons' traditional enemies.

Still, anaCheeya was no closer to getting control of null sec nomads. For now, he would need to be patient. In the meantime, the mind of the "kingpin" would devise even deadlier devices.

To be continued...

Sunday, October 20, 2019

Kills of the Week

Sigh. It seems like every week is "Skill Point Week" these days. Friends, these so-called "skill points" will get you no closer to victory in EVE. For that, you're gonna need the Code. And the truth is, every week is Code Week. Always!

You know things are going badly when you've lost 4.2 billion isk before you count the five Abyssal mods on your ship (which zKillboard does not value). That's what happened to Furaibou Ikkala after he autopiloted his way toward Niarja. Agents Rungerd, Votre Dieu, Astrid Tyrfing, and Narl' Amhar executed him. I'm sure you'll agree that the punishment fit the crime.

At the end of last week, Dark Angelete parked her freighter in the Hampinen system and went AFK. This proved to be a fatal mistake, as Hampinen is located in New Order territory. So her ship attracted a gank fleet consisting of Agents Selenia Phat'kola, Apex142, space gator, LTiger007, Commander McBrag, LingWai II, Elos Haliat, Bimbler, Joshua Darkmoor, Ginger 198723 Asanari, Aaaarrgg, Troop101, djNME, Pod-Goo RepoWoman, DoesPlenty, and Pod-Goo Repairman. You don't need to go to a stargate to get your freighter killed; our Agents deliver!

Also late last week, Thadek Dash lost his 5.8 billion isk Bowhead. What went wrong? Well, the carebear did manage to tank up his ship: His mids, lows, and even rigs all made use of the Bowhead's ability to inflate its hitpoints and resistances. Yet this carebear made some serious mistakes, too. For one, he did not get a mining permit and obey the Code. For another, he went to Uedama when the Kusions were in town. Agents Justin Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Jeremy Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Jacob Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Jake Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Joel Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Josh Kusion, Jimmy Kusion, Jack Kusion, Josiah Kusion, Jeffery Kusion, Jonas Kusion, Jessie Kusion, Jason Kusion, and Caution AsianDrivers Ahead rolled up their sleeves and went to work on the Bowhead's supposedly impervious defenses.

Capacitor tanking is still a thing, it seems. And so are ORE Strip Miners, despite being good for nothing but attracting gankers. Sexy Satan was busy mining a 0.9 security system until Agents Pod-Goo RepoWoman and Aaaarrgg showed up and taught him what Code enforcers think of ORE contraband.

Another one! Kryak Hakomairos of the ISBE Mining and Mayhem corp got a little less mining time than he bargained for--and a whole lot more mayhem. Agents Pyro Regyri, Aiko Danuja, Alleil Pollard, Shambort, and Lewak tracked him down and put his 751 million isk mining ship to death.

Remember Sexy Satan? His time in the crosshairs wasn't done when he lost his decadent Mackinaw. For he was ganked by a group of Agents who can sniff out a blingy pod from a dozen jumps away. Once the Mackinaw shell was removed, Agent Pod-Goo Repoman went in for the kill.

As a result, 3.4 billion isk was vaporized. Interestingly, Sexy Satan's implants only consisted of hardwirings; the five "main" implant slots were all left empty. That might be a first for a Pod of the Week. What a unique Goofus!

Saturday, October 19, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 5

Previously, on MinerBumping... With the help of his new friends in the New Order, anaCheeya ANARKY set out on a nullsec adventure. anaCheeya was required to entrust his property and control of his corporation, null sec nomads, with the Agents. But after arriving deep in Goon space, the miner found no one to greet him.

Once upon a time, anaCheeya mined in Rorquals and Orcas. Now he was forced to reboot his career from scratch.

The business model of null sec nomads corp remained mysterious, as it depended on nullsec empires allowing the miner to travel freely among them. But anaCheeya had multiple contingencies in place: If necessary, he could destroy even the mighty Imperium.

anaCheeya began to fantasize about his plans. This is not unusual. Miners tend to spend a lot more time fantasizing than actually doing stuff.

One might say that miners' daydreams are a form of being mentally AFK.

A few days after the adventure began, anaCheeya finally realized that his EVEmails to the Saviour of Highsec may have lacked context. All would be cleared up in time.

Later that week, anaCheeya was still having trouble getting his plan greenlit by Imperium leadership. He grew desperate:

For some reason, anaCheeya believed that biomassing his character was the key to getting through Goon security. According to Agent Aiko Danuja, the miner came up with this idea on his own.

After biomassing anaCheeya, the miner was reborn as aiva naali. At long last, anaCheeya/aiva decided to explain what the null sec nomads were all about. The miner wrote an essay--or manifesto--explaining all. Unfortunately, anaCheeya's new incarnation was no more fond of capital letters, punctuation, paragraphs, and the like.

The crux of anaCheeya's plan was twofold: First, the miner agreed not to take sovereignty from any of the nullsec empires he invaded; he would merely take their resources. Second, the miner would leverage the power of a superweapon called the "rat bomb". Agent Aiko was the inventor of said superweapon.

Recognizing that some nullsec powers may not agree to his idea, anaCheeya had a way to sweeten the deal: He'd recruit newbies to his corp and train them to take even more resources.

A few days later, anaCheeya's plan still had not come to pass. The miner had returned to highsec. His new priority was to regain control of the null sec nomads corporation. Agent Kalorned's associate was still the CEO. Kalorned was pleased to learn that anaCheeya had recently acquired a 500 million isk windfall, because...

...By sheer coincidence, anaCheeya owed Kalorned 500 million isk. An invoice was prepared.

anaCheeya would need to pay 500 million isk for Kalorned to return control of null sec nomads. Though the miner had been willing to meet all of his demands up to this point, anaCheeya's faith was being sorely tested. The all-important question remained:

Did he have full faith?

To be continued...

Friday, October 18, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 4

Previously, on MinerBumping... anaCheeya ANARKY revealed his plan to invade the territory of nullsec empires and take their stuff--all under the banner of his newly formed null sec nomads corporation. After Agents of the New Order ganked anaCheeya's Orca in highsec, they offered to help the ambitious miner go to nullsec and realize his dreams.

Our Agents gave the miner his coordinates. If all went well, he would travel deep into the heart of Goon territory and set up shop there. But, of course, one does not simply show up in Imperium space without an invitation. Requirements had to be met.

To ensure that anaCheeya was given a proper introduction, the miner was instructed to hand over his assets to the Agents of the New Order. As for anaCheeya's corp, it would need a new CEO. The miner transferred control to Agent Cruel Sandivich, who had plenty of relevant experience.

As a show of trust, anaCheeya was also encouraged to draw a picture of a dolphin.

Now that he had everything he needed, anaCheeya slowly made his way through nullsec in a pod. As he went, the miner sent updates to the Saviour of Highsec--who so far had not communicated with him in any way.

Though the Saviour was not in direct contact with anaCheeya, the miner and his new friends kept in touch through in-game channels and Discord. Miraculously, anaCheeya made it to his destination unharmed. But no one was there.

anaCheeya hoped to reach out to the Saviour again by EVEmail, but he no longer had 315 isk to pay the spam fee. After a time, our heroes advised anaCheeya to travel even further into Goon space. He would make contact with someone eventually.

Disaster! Someone popped anaCheeya's pod in Delve.

anaCheeya was rattled: The people who killed him should've been his new allies.

The miner couldn't understand why anyone would want to kill him. He was capable of piloting a Rorqual, which meant that he could contribute by taking other people's ore.

One of the attackers explained that he had been acting on pure adrenaline.

Though annoyed and mildly inconvenienced, anaCheeya chose to forgive those who had killed him. Things would get better tomorrow.

As time went on, though, anaCheeya began to feel troubled. He didn't like being without a corp, without a home, and without assets. He wanted to get rich quick. And the only people who could help him achieve his goals were the Agents of the New Order.

To be continued...