Saturday, July 20, 2019

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #188

Some people play EVE to escape reality. That's fine--people escape reality all the time. However...

...No one can escape the Code. Welcome to another edition of the Highsec Miner Grab Bag!

Our Agents were curious about Lord Keith Tivianne's decision to mine without a permit. He was an expert at changing the subject, but our Agents aren't easily distracted.

Agent Lewak name-dropped the Saviour of Highsec. Would the miner out himself as a Goofus?

"Shitty hell face"?


Some say that new players should never be ganked. How do "new players" really react to being ganked? Let's find out:

Ganking improves player retention because it introduces players to PvP. Imagine the horrors of abandoning an innocent newbie to EVE's PvE "content". That's what makes them quit.

On the other hand, bad players react badly--even to being ganked.

In fact, bad players get angry when they see someone else playing well. It's as if bad players avoid fun and hate to see others having fun. Anti-Code is anti-fun.

I guess another 60-man fleet got lost on the way to highsec.

The New Order doesn't merely "pretend that something can"; we know that something can. The Code makes it possible!

It looks like someone took a long break from EVE and recently returned. FYI, mining permits are still being sold for just 10 million isk.

Friday, July 19, 2019

Contract Killer, Part 4

Previously, on MinerBumping... Maja Papaja made Agent Alt 00 an indecent proposal: Maja would pay her a billion isk to wipe out a target of Maja's choice. Everything was going according to Maja's plan--until a snag was hit.

Maja paid the billion isk fee, and Agent Alt stood poised to deliver a death blow upon Maja's enemy. And just as soon as one more task was completed, the deed would be done.

Alt 00 was getting ready to strike when Maja made a strange comment about maybe not owning a New Order mining permit.

Our Agent was puzzled. Why would a Code violator attempt to do business with a Code enforcer? That would be like going to a police station to make a sales call when there's a warrant out for your arrest.

Thanks to Maja's curious remarks, the conversation became strained and awkward. Alt 00 sent her Caracal gank fleet back to port so that she could give Maja her full attention.

Alt 00 offered the unlicensed carebear a mining permit for the low, low price of 10 million isk. Yet it seemed that the whole "Code" thing was not to Maja's taste. Alt tested Maja further by linking the name of the Saviour of Highsec.

Maja responded to the Saviour's name like a vampire to garlic.

In case you were curious, this is the portrait that Alt 00 linked. I recommend clicking the link to view the full-size version, as there are many exquisite details.

Maja balked at paying our Agent 10 million isk, even though she had just transferred one hundred times that amount only a few moments earlier.

Agent Revis Owen dropped in, and not a moment too soon: Maja's targets were still hanging around the area, but who knew for how long?

There was little doubt that Maja was in violation of the Code, but Alt 00 was very mindful of the fact that she had a billion isk of Maja's money sitting in her wallet. Perhaps Agent Revis could find a way to ensure that all parties would be satisfied.

Luckily for Maja, our Agents are EVE's greatest problem solvers.

To be continued...

Thursday, July 18, 2019

Over One Trillion Eight Hundred Sixty-Three Billion in Shares Sold

Today, another tale of two Supreme Protector's Tips of the Hat™.

Our first Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™ goes to Priscilla Pareka, who added to her holdings of New Order stock by purchasing 1,000 shares. This guaranteed that we would pass another billion isk mark; in this case, the 1,862 billion isk mark. Priscilla therefore also guaranteed herself a Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™, which she now receives.

Then there's Scarlet Macaw Salvage and Transport, our newest corporate shareholder. The corp made a humble purchase of just 30 shares. However, this purchase very narrowly nudged us past the 1,863 billion isk mark. Thus, Scarlet Macaw earns a Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™, too--one no less valid than Priscilla's.

There's a lot to ponder there, eh?


New Eden Mining Authority, a member corp of the mighty CODE. alliance, frequently enforces the Code in highsec by ganking unlicensed miners.

Stoneweight was ganked for non-compliance in Halaima itself, losing a Hulk and a 43 million isk pod in the process. Although Stoneweight has been in EVE since 2008, some critics might accuse our Agents of bullying an impoverished newbie and making his EVE experience worse.

Not so fast. Two days later, Stoneweight returned to his keyboard and sent an EVEmail to Aiko Danuja, who wasn't a participant on the gank:

Stoneweight was one happy miner. He sang CODE.'s praises. How can the rebels and skeptics complain about our effect on the game when even ganked miners think we help them?

Upon receiving the EVEmail, Agent Aiko reflected deeply upon her killboard, allegedly the worst that Stoneweight has ever seen. She considered that perhaps Stoneweight had forgotten about his own killboard, so she reminded him of his recent Hulk loss--and got a surprise in return:

As it turns out, the Hulk loss cost Stoneweight and his corp absolutely nothing. Indeed, the miners made tens of billions of isk in profits as a direct result of CODE.'s activities. There you have it, right from the horse's mouth: CODE. is making miners rich, even by ganking them. Who can complain about that?

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Contract Killer, Part 3

Previously, on MinerBumping... Maja Papaja had a grudge against one of her fellow anti-Code carebears. Having witnessed the awesome power of the Code in action many times, Maja decided to contact Agent Alt 00 and ask her to be a hired gun.

Things were getting real. Alt 00 unveiled her Caracal gank squad. Maja marveled.

Maja's enemy had a small fleet. Our Agent would select one of the ships for destruction.

The moment of action was quickly approaching. As any Code enforcer knows, ganking requires steady nerves. It soon became clear that Maja wasn't used to experiencing the art of the gank from this side of things.

Alt 00 calmly explained the complex machinery of a ganking operation, step by step.

When hunting carebears--especially a group of them--every second counts. They could move on at any time, without warning. The clock was ticking.

The tension grew. The success or failure of the mission would be determined by what happened in the next few minutes. Everything had to go flawlessly.

At the last second, Maja had an attack of nerves. Luckily for her, an Agent of the New Order was at the helm.

No more time for talk. This thing was going down.

Maja handed over the full payment of 1 billion isk to Alt 00. It would be the best billion she'd ever spent. Time to launch.

...After one minor formality was taken care of, that is.

What do you mean, "start"?

This is Alt 00 we're talking about. She never stopped.

To be continued...

Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Contract Killer, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent Alt 00 was contacted by the mysterious Maja Papaja, who wanted to hire her to gank an unidentified enemy. Intense negotiations ensued.

Aside from the billion isk upfront fee, Maja was getting skittish about the gank itself. Our Agent assured her that the mighty CODE. alliance knows how to kill stuff in highsec.

Now that she was seriously contemplating paying Alt 00 a billion isk, Maja couldn't help but feel anxiety about the whole thing. She drew strength from Agent Alt 00's invincible confidence.

'Twas time to move things along. Alt 00 was eager to get paid.

Maja fretted about the details; our Agent indulged her.

The plan began to take shape. But Alt 00 never forgot her primary mission: to see justice done in highsec. Subtly, she tested Maja to learn more about her true intentions.

Finally, Maja revealed the name of her main target. It was a familiar one.

...For Alt 00 had dealt with the individual in question.

Vantaanya's conduct ensured that not only had he failed to organize a successful anti-Code resistance during the Triglavian Invasion--he made active enemies of his would-be supporters!

It's safe to say that Vantaanya's reputation couldn't get much worse. But Maja was the one ordering the hit.

When Alt 00 learned the location of the intended target, she decided to organize the gank fleet in Aufay instead of Nakugard.

Maja was summoned to Aufay so that she could see the fleet was real.

And it was a glorious sight to behold.

To be continued...