Thursday, July 30, 2015

The Day the Miner Fought Back, Part 1

The New Order has grown by leaps and bounds. Now even the farthest reaches of New Order space are patrolled by our Agents. An elite detachment consisting of Agents Get Well Soon, Mark Eting, and Lisa Tears set out on an expedition to the Genesis region. They were prepared for whatever they might find in the boondocks of highsec.


Our heroes discovered an Orca piloted by dutchkiwi. A quick background check revealed him to be a rebel. The carebear claimed to be affiliated with a nullsec alliance. It was odd, really: Though he was friendly to CVA, he wasn't friendly to the New Order, which ruled the space he actually lived in. Alongside dutchkiwi's Orca was his Hulk alt, Pureminer Pava.


That's when things got interesting. As soon as Pureminer detected a New Order presence in local, he swapped out his Hulk in favor of a combat ship, a Stratios. He intended to ambush our Agents with a counter-gank!


Pureminer fell victim to something he couldn't possibly have expected: A counter-counter-gank! Our Agents landed on grid and tore apart his disturbingly fail-fit Stratios.

Despite Pureminer's rebellious attitude, our Agents were optimistic. If a carebear is alert enough to watch for gankers and willing to go to the effort of setting a trap, he might have a little Gallant left in him. Many "active" rebels have joined the New Order because they realize that they enjoy playing the game more than isk-grinding.

On the other hand, some rebels completely buy into the notion that our Agents can only shoot ships that can't shoot back. They think the New Order is a bunch of pushovers--rather than elite warriors, as is actually the case. Rebels with this attitude don't handle it well when they're beaten by the New Order.


It wasn't long before our heroes wondered if Pureminer was one of those rebels.


Early indications were negative. Even when told to calm down, the miner remained in an angry state.


Pureminer Pava was indeed one of the carebears who was willing to try PvP but didn't like it very much. The experience had only solidified his twisted love for an all-PvE playstyle.


Deprived of his comfort zone, Pureminer began spewing Miner Bingo quotes and other standard-issue spin in local chat. The carebear's Stratios was "free", presumably just like everything else he'd earned from grinding.


Insecure carebears like to switch over to their alts mid-conversation and shed tears from multiple characters. dutchkiwi, his Orca pilot, took point.


Then the carebear did something very revealing: He played the "you only shoot ships that don't shoot back" card even though our Agents had ganked his combat ship, which he was actively attempting to use in an ambush against them. Agents, remember this lesson well. There are no circumstances under which a carebear won't play the "you only shoot non-combat ships" card. It is meaningless. It's merely something rebels say to make themselves feel better about the New Order's obvious superiority.


The miner quickly abandoned any attempt to explain why his combat ship was a non-combat ship. He began desperately scraping at the remains of the bottom of the barrel. "I have kill rights, and I will use them!"


Our Agents couldn't escape the feeling that maybe Pureminer Pava wasn't Gallant material after all. The carebear might not be cut out for the New Order, but could he at least be persuaded to calm down and buy a mining permit?

To be continued...

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Yes, We Can Kill Your Freighter, Part 3

Previously, on MinerBumping... It began with a freighter full of blueprints.


Aaron Alckschild's dismissive attitude turned to horror when he learned that his freighter could, in fact, be killed. When Aaron begged for the return of his precious BPOs, Enia McCool and Multiple Inbound Supercaps had to explain that only half of a ship's cargo survives. The distraught carebear frantically negotiated for the remaining half.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > you were carrying 10 bil
Aaron Alckschild > YES
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > and you expected you wouldn't die
Aaron Alckschild > I DIDNT kno
Enia McCool > I gave you fair warning man
The bot-aspirant felt his ignorance deserved to be rewarded with a discount. That's not the way the Code works, however.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > if you had paid ransom you would have been fine
Aaron Alckschild > I DIDNT KNOW you could kill me and I think you should give me something back
Aaron Alckschild > shit this sucks
Aaron Alckschild > how about 3.5 bil
Luckily, Aaron's net worth was climbing rapidly over the course of the conversation. He now had almost enough money to buy the blueprints that had survived the gank.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > for...
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > all of them?
Aaron Alckschild > yeah
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > you can have nearly all of them
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > 3.5 will buy you drones and ships
Aaron Alckschild > no man come on, for all of them
Aaron was engaged in an internal tug of war between his desperation and his greed. One moment he would beg and offer more isk; the next moment he would try to get a better deal.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > i'm a businessman
Aaron Alckschild > bro, cant you consider my loss????
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > no
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > do you want them or not
Aaron Alckschild > yeah
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > 3.5 for drones and ships
Aaron Alckschild > and the other too come on
Which side of Aaron's psyche would prove stronger?
Aaron Alckschild > ok
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > you have like 2 minutes to decide
Aaron Alckschild > ok yes
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > [Multiple Items] (Item Exchange)
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > if you don't accept it i will take it down in 5 and put it on public contracts
Finally, Aaron relented. The supposedly bankrupt carebear would pay 3.5 billion isk for the surviving drone and ship BPOs.
Aaron Alckschild > wheres the naga bpo?
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > oops
Aaron Alckschild > and the ferox
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > let me re do it
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > [Multiple Items] (Item Exchange)
Aaron Alckschild > im checking
Aaron Alckschild > just a sec
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > its everything but the talos
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > we are keeping that
However, at the last minute, the deal was jeopardized by unforeseen obstacles.
Aaron Alckschild > No man
Aaron Alckschild > we had a deal
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > i've already put it in build
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > so
Aaron Alckschild > no way man
Aaron Alckschild > thats not fair
The Talos BPO was off the table. The gankers were already putting it to good use. (Maybe this explains all the Taloses we've seen lately?)
Aaron Alckschild > look ill give you the 4 bil for the whole thing, all the bpos
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > it'll be everything but the talos
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > seeing as we need them
Aaron Alckschild > shit man, that one along cost a lot
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > i know
Aaron Alckschild > come on, i need the talos one
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > so do we
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > hence
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > its mine
The carebear was despondent. The Talos BPO was one of the most valuable items in his collection. The collection that used to be his, anyway.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > 3.5 for the ones on contract
Aaron Alckschild > can you at least include the other ones
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > i am not searching through 700 bpos for them
Aaron Alckschild > you have 700 bpos?
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > yes
Aaron Alckschild > shit thats a lot
Aaron Alckschild > you got those by gancking?
Aaron Alckschild > thats crazy
The carebear was bewildered by the gankers' wealth. He had no idea that EVE players could make money by actually playing the game, rather than mindlessly grinding for years in highsec.
Aaron Alckschild > man if you have so much cant you at least cut the price just a little bit
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > no
Aaron Alckschild > im really poor compared to you guys
Enia McCool > take it or leave it, we're gonna log soon
Aaron Alckschild > shit man
Aaron Alckschild > i also need the ancillary ones man
Aaron Alckschild > please
Aaron Alckschild > and the capacitor ones
In any case, the exclusion of the Talos BPO put Aaron in a tight spot. The price of 3.5 billion for the narrowly defined set of BPOs didn't seem so attractive. But Aaron needed those blueprints badly.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > 30 seconds
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > [Multiple Items] (Item Exchange)
Aaron Alckschild > shit man i did it
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > there you go
Aaron Alckschild > shit man now im broke
Aaron Alckschild > what should i do next time this happens
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > pay the ransom
Aaron Alckschild > shit
Alas, the carebear suffered from buyer's remorse from the very moment he accepted the contract.
Aaron Alckschild > you have to give me now like a lifetime pass or something you know
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > no we don't
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > where do you get that logic from
Aaron Alckschild > yeah you said something like that
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > only if you pay the permit
Even now, with no leverage whatsoever, Aaron was eager to get more out of the deal. What an isk-crazy carebear.
Aaron Alckschild > well shit i just paid you about twice
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > you were buying stuff from me
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > different things
Aaron Alckschild > shit man, do you have other bpos you can sell for a discount or something?
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > not really
Aaron Alckschild > man i could pay a few bil more for a couple of bpos
Enia McCool > cya next time o/
There was no end to Aaron's lies. A few minutes after declaring himself broke, he offered to buy more blueprints. But the blueprint business was closed, for now. Our heroes had destroyed billions of isk worth of contraband, acquired a useful Talos BPO along with some miscellaneous blueprints, and made a profit from a large sale to the gank recipient. Most importantly, they taught an arrogant freighter pilot some valuable lessons about EVE game mechanics and humility. All in a day's work.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Just Like the Interbus Ship Identification System

Put yourself in the illegal miner's shoes for a moment.


After no more than a moment in his shoes, you get ganked. Such is life in modern highsec. When you lose your fail-fit Retriever, what's the mature, adult response?


Judging by the carebears we've seen lately, the most natural reaction to losing a ship is to compare your fellow EVE player to the Interbus Ship Identification System. The system has developed a bad reputation, but maybe an upcoming revamp, FozzieISIS, will fare better.


I'm only kidding, of course. Comparing us to a ship identification system would be silly. They compare us to a terrorist organization.


Fortunately, most EVE players recognize the carebear nonsense for what it is.


Agent Mal Warre ganked Panda of Doom's Retriever. Then our Agent explained how absurd the miner was being. Two favors in one day!


However, Panda stood by his ISIS analogy.


According to the rebels, law enforcement in highsec is terrorism. If real-life terrorists were like the New Order, would everyone else behave like EVE's carebears? I shudder to think of all the babies left unattended, all of the crying and screaming--and the babies might cry, too. Even worse, the terrorists would always win.


Panda had shocking ideas about highsec's purpose. Apparently he believed that EVE players are "developed" through years of AFK mining, autopiloting in fail-fit ships, ore buyback programs, and CEOs who tell everyone to stay docked up during a wardec. Developed, but into what? Bot-aspirants. Agent Mal told Panda that this was unacceptable.


For his efforts, our Agent's integrity was questioned. Panda just didn't get it: In Mal Warre's spare time, she enforces the Code. That should've been obvious.


Despite exchanging several EVEmails with an Agent of the New Order, Panda was not able to open his mind. He remained decidedly anti-permit. This puts the miner in terrible danger. As Panda himself knows, winter is coming, and he is not prepared for it. Madness and bot-aspirancy will keep a miner angry, but only a New Order permit will keep him warm.

Monday, July 27, 2015

Yes, We Can Kill Your Freighter, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... A valiant New Order/Imperium task force succeeded in destroying Aaron Alckschild's freighter, which was filled with BPOs. The total loss was over 10 billion isk--a frightful price to pay for the crime of bot-aspirancy. The bumper, Enia McCool, had offered to let Aaron go free for a small ransom. But Aaron had been supremely confident that he couldn't be ganked in a 1.0 security system, so he taunted the gankers. After losing all his stuff, Aaron changed his tune completely. He pleaded for the safe return of the blueprints.
Enia McCool > well, just talked to the other guys, they want to keep the stuff, 1b just won't cut it
Aaron Alckschild > well what the heck, how much do you want
Aaron Alckschild > i have a really bad headache right now
Aaron Alckschild > I NEEEED those bpos
The carebear claimed to have only 1 billion isk left in his wallet. Almost everything he owned was in that freighter.
Enia McCool > well since you only have 1b, you're not going to be able to buy it back
Enia McCool > we've made up our mind, next time, pay the bumper, and don't carry all your stuff at once
Aaron Alckschild > NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Aaron Alckschild > I NEED THEM , DONT GO
Aaron Alckschild > PLEASE AT LEAST SOME OF THEM
Aaron was in a poor bargaining position. It was trivially easy for Enia to sell the blueprints on the open market for full price. The gank did occur in highsec, after all.
Aaron Alckschild > MY GOD PLEASE, CONSIDER AN OFFER OR SOMETHING
Aaron Alckschild > THERES GOT TO BE SOMETHING WE CAN WORK OUT
Aaron Alckschild > ILL GIVE YOU 3 BILLION
Aaron Alckschild > ILL GIVE YOU 3 BILLION FOR THE BPOS
Aaron Alckschild > PLEASE
Aaron Alckschild > I HAVE NOTHING ELSE LEFT
Aaron Alckschild > ITS TOO BIG OF A LOSS AND YOU GUYS KNOW IT
Only a few moments earlier, Aaron had 1 billion in his wallet. Now he offered 3 billion for nearly 10 billion worth of BPOs. Typical carebear.


Enia was now preoccupied with the task of tending to the newly acquired treasure trove. She invited Multiple Inbound Supercaps to the convo. Multiple was authorized to negotiate with the distraught carebear. However, Aaron was so busy wailing that he didn't even notice Multiple's appearance.
Aaron Alckschild > ITS NOT FAIR
Aaron Alckschild > IVE BEEN WORKING FOR THIS FOR SUCH A LONG TIME
Aaron Alckschild > I CANNOT AFFORD TO LOSE THEM
Aaron Alckschild > I NEED THEM
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > is your caps lock broken?
Aaron Alckschild > NO COME ON, DUDE im am devastated
Aaron Alckschild > theres got to be something we can work out
The first step, clearly, was for the carebear to calm down.
Aaron Alckschild > shit man, this effin sucks big time
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > right
Aaron Alckschild > you know how many hours i but into this game to earn that isk
Aaron Alckschild > its really really hard work
Aaron Alckschild > and i dont have that much money left
Actually, Aaron didn't calm down very much. But he at least seemed more in control of himself once he did all his bawling in lower-case.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > we have 4 bil in blueprints
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > from you
Aaron Alckschild > what about the other bpos?
Aaron Alckschild > other people took them?
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > those are all that dropped
Aaron Alckschild > which ones are they?
For the first time, Aaron learned that the gankers didn't have all 10 billion isk in their possession.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > look at the killmail
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > those are the ones we have
Aaron Alckschild > wait a minute, so you only have the green ones?
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > yes
Aaron Alckschild > where the heck are the other ones then?
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > destroyed
Aaron Alckschild > no way
Aaron Alckschild > destroyed how?
It took a while for Aaron to come to grips with the fact that he'd lost much of his BPO library. He couldn't get those blueprints back, even if the gankers wanted him to.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > game mechanics
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > you died
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > 50% of loot drops
Aaron Alckschild > ah crap
An EVE player since 2010, ladies and gentlemen.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > so do you want them or not
Aaron Alckschild > yeah but you have to give them with a discount i mean i cannot afford to pay for them
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > how much isk do you have
Aaron Alckschild > 2 billion
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > that'll get you half the blueprints
Aaron Alckschild > ok wait
One of the reasons most of us don't have a great fondness for highsec PvE'ers is that they lie so much. To summarize, Aaron claimed to have only 1 billion isk left to his name. Then he offered 3 billion for the BPOs, and now he had only 2 billion--all within the space of an hour. The carebear's wealth was rapidly fluctuating.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > what
Aaron Alckschild > ok ill give you 2.5 bil
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > For what
Aaron Alckschild > for all of them, i mean i cannot afford to lose all the money, i mean i just lost a lot
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > you must be joking
Seconds later, Aaron was back up to 2.5 billion isk. And carebears accuse our Agents of being untrustworthy! For the sake of comparison, a New Order mining permit cost 10 million isk three years ago, and it costs the exact same amount today. You can safely rely on the New Order.
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > why would i sell 4 bil worth of stuff
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > for 2 bil
Aaron Alckschild > man
Aaron Alckschild > come on
Aaron Alckschild > cant you consider my loss
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > well
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > no
For some reason, Aaron felt absolutely entitled to a hefty discount. But when was the last time a freighter pilot gave gankers a break?
Aaron Alckschild > how about 3 bil
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > 3 =/= 4
Aaron Alckschild > dude come on, give me a cut, its really expensive
Aaron Alckschild > I lost HALF OF the blueprints
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > you were carrying 10 bil
Aaron Alckschild > YES
Multiple Inbound Supercaps > and you expected you wouldn't die
Aaron Alckschild > I DIDNT kno
Deprived of the one thing he cared about, the carebear became unmoored from reality. He was flopping around like a fish out of water. Did Aaron have any hope of attaining redemption--or at least some of his precious BPOs?

To be continued...

Sunday, July 26, 2015

Kills of the Week

Highsec has been busy! So much happens in New Order territory each week that it's impossible to follow it all--even in these jam-packed Kills of the Week posts. Let's start off by jumping into the middle of a conversation that occurred during the week of July 19th @ 00:00 EVEtime through July 25th @ 23:59 EVEtime...
Krillnodd Burnebataar > I can't afford your fee and I can't afford another ship
Krillnodd Burnebataar > I have 12 million which I need for taxes on what I am about to haul to market ...I can't even afford my plex this month
Krillnodd Burnebataar > I put everything into this ship to try and plex my account
Krillnodd Burnebataar > I am trying to keep playing eve
C-ta Vilosa > me too
C-ta Vilosa > and if every freighter pilot i bump keeps lying to me i can't even afford bigger ships, let alone plex
It was another bad week for bot-aspirant freighters.
Krillnodd Burnebataar > you can tell my charcter is not that old ...Ive tried mining and that did not work ...now I am trying hauling
Krillnodd Burnebataar > I have spent all my skill time on mining and the skill for this ship
Krillnodd Burnebataar > whatever ...I am sick of dishonest people like you and the constant harrasment ...eve is not worth all this bullshit ...I try to help people but this game brings the worst out in people ...so do it if you are going to do it
Krillnodd Burnebataar > all I have is some veld and scor and not that much either
Krillnodd Burnebataar > my baby is crying so i am going afk
To be fair, we can't be sure his baby was actually crying. Maybe Krillnodd was on a laptop in some location with an echo.


Meanwhile, the Anti-Ganking channel offered Krillnodd little hope. Except for an alt of the bumper, who encouraged him to buy a permit.
C-ta Vilosa > it might be a good idea to dock up first if you wanna go afk
Krillnodd Burnebataar > duh ...I would dock if I could
C-ta Vilosa > well you'd be able to dock if you paid up
C-ta Vilosa > wanna eject from that freighter? we can take the ore as payment and let you go
Krillnodd Burnebataar > fuck you ...do it
The situation became desperate. Krillnodd didn't want to leave before seeing his freighter die, but he also had to deal with the baby in his house. (The other baby, I mean. The one that wasn't playing EVE.) Finally, he asked our Agents do put him out of his misery. They did it. Now let's see some killmails!



Mysake and a few of his friends in Uedama didn't get the memo that CODEdot has a wardeccing corp comprised of members who have positive security status. When they saw one of our Agents sitting on a station undock in her Proteus, they couldn't resist attempting to kill her. Oops! That's not how highsec works. Agents Kaely Tanniss, Caldari Sentry Gun III, and CONCORD Police Captain joined forces to take them down. Kaely didn't even need to pay a wardec fee on that one.



What's worse than equipping ORE Strip Miners to your ship? Putting them in your cargo bay while you mine with tech I ice harvesters. Anaeth was too lazy and too bot-aspirant to remember which station held her gear, so she kept it with her. She neglected to bring any kind of tanking modules, or a mining permit for that matter. She was eliminated by Agents John E Normus, loyalanon, and Sophia Soprano, who also grabbed her 379 million isk pod, for an even billion isk loss.



Arle lost his ORE bling the old-fashioned way. Agents Ilithyia Borgia and Mal Warre detected his illegal activity and fried the 888 million isk Hulk. Credit where credit's due--they had some help:


Agent Guristas Invader was steadily plinking away at the Hulk long before they arrived. But the pod was saved for the human gankers. It was a juicy one, worth 3.2 billion isk. Thus, Arle lost over 4 billion isk, all so he could steal some of my Pyroxeres. He could've just asked.



Olusegun Obasanjo was terribly confused. He flew a cloaky-probey Orca with a mix of tank and anti-tank. What was he up to? Agents John E Normus, Ann Boncroft, Tisiphone Dira, and Catalyst Knight noticed Olusegun AFK autopiloting through highsec. They repeatedly invited him to private convos, but he never responded. After confirming that he was AFK, they rode into battle and won a glorious victory.


Nearly 5 billion isk of Carbon-86 Epoxy Resin was safely recovered. So far, Olusegun hasn't petitioned our Agents for reimbursement. Maybe he left his keyboard and never came back.



ironwool barreled into Jita with a 25 billion isk jump freighter. Such a ship can withstand a lot of damage in a 0.9 security system. When faced with a threat like this, the forces of good band together. A massive gank fleet was formed with 35 ships, including 16 Taloses. They brought justice to Jita! Many thanks to Agents Sophia Soprano, Salah ad-Din al-Jawahiri, John E Normus, Ilithyia Borgia, Sasha Cohenberg, JerryRin AT2016 Commentator, BoneyTooth Thompkins ISK-Chip, loyalanon, Ido Adudu, Fabulous Andy, OogaBooga WhereDa FreighterAt, Straight Up Dominated, Jason Kusion, Poopsock Jones, Yojiro, General Nelson, Generic5Guy, Galdor Amandilis, Krios Deninard, mooking, Unfit ForDoody, holdmybeer, Bob Painter, Mal Warre, SynthiaGreey, kaz89, Worlds Hatter, Seduxine, Martyr Oira, lock fire squish, Stein Cohenberg, Silvester Cohenberg, Sherman Cohenberg, Globby, and Etriza.

Note: Anti-Ganking failed again.



Autopiloting through highsec in a rookie ship, Malleus Hereticus looked like nothing more than a newbie. Agent Aaaarrgg checked his profile. Malleus was a 2009 character with miner propaganda in his bio. That's no noob! Our hero tore through the enemy's pod and shattered 4.8 billion isk worth of mining implants. As any New Order Agent can tell you, there's more than one way to harvest in highsec.

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Yes, We Can Kill Your Freighter, Part 1

I'd like to think it's more than a coincidence that highsec has improved so much since I took power.
Enia McCool > hi
Aaron Alckschild > sup
Enia McCool > ransom is 600m or we're going to gank you
Aaron Alckschild > lol what an asshole
Case in point, another lovely day in highsec.


Aaron Alckschild had been playing EVE for more than five years. He'd seen a thing or two--but not much more. He spent his five years engaged in highsec PvE, very, very, very slowly grinding isk. Then, at last, something interesting happened: His freighter was bumped.
Enia McCool > well, it's either a ransom or lose your stuff
Aaron Alckschild > leave me alone
Aaron Alckschild > stop it
Enia McCool > no, pay up or die
Aaron Alckschild > go pick on someone else
Enia McCool > you're the best one to pick on right now
Aaron attempted to engage his verbal warp core stabilizers, but to no avail. The bumper didn't wish to let Aaron's freighter go.
Enia McCool > do you see all those flashy red guys in local?
Enia McCool > they're with me, so you can choose to pay for me to "let you slip away"
Aaron Alckschild > ok ill give you 5 mil
The bumper claimed to be backed up by an Imperium/New Order gank force. However, Aaron didn't take her threats very seriously. His freighter wasn't caught in Uedama or Niarja, after all; he had the good fortune to be in Niyabainen, a 1.0 security system. This made Aaron almost completely invulnerable to ganks.


However, there were some warning signs for Aaron to consider. Enia McCool made no effort to disguise her life's purpose. She linked plenty of freighter killmails in her bio.
Enia McCool > time is running out
Enia McCool > see, you have an unbelievable amount of blueprints on you
Enia McCool > and by the looks of they could all be researched
Enia McCool > id say 600m is peanuts compared to what it's worth
Enia McCool > we're ready to kill you, timer's run out, so pay up now or you're dead
Aaron was running a great risk with his bot-aspirant hauling operation. His freighter was packed with blueprints. Actually, it wasn't "packed", since you can hardly fill such a large space with blueprints. Still, Aaron felt safe in the warm embrace of the 1.0 security system. He brushed aside the threats.
Aaron Alckschild > wait
...Until it was too late.


A gank fleet of 29 vessels, including several Taloses, dropped in. Aaron's freighter and its expensive library of BPOs went boom.
Enia McCool > no, you were too late
Enia McCool > so next time, remember, I don't bluff
Aaron Alckschild > NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Enia McCool > 600m doesn't sound like much now does it?
Aaron Alckschild > NNNOO ASHOLE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"!!!
In an instant, it occurred to Aaron that he needed to re-evaluate the situation.
Enia McCool > I warned you didn'tI
Aaron Alckschild > DUDE COME ONE, ill pay you now
Aaron Alckschild > please
Enia McCool > àlright, give me the 600m and I'll contract you back the stuff
Aaron Alckschild > shit
Aaron Alckschild > DUDE please, i worked so hard for all that stuff, and i didnt think you could really kill me like that
The carebear was filled with regret. This is a common attribute of the post-gank bot-aspirant. If only they possessed foresight in equal measure.
Enia McCool > well I can, but look, if you pay me the 600m now you'll have it all back in an instant
Aaron Alckschild > thats silly
Aaron Alckschild > the only way we could do this if by a contract
Enia McCool > not paying in the first place was silly
Aaron Alckschild > i know, but i didnt know you could kill me
Enia McCool > you didn't bother to check my bio did you?
Aaron didn't think he was properly warned by Enia. Her warnings weren't enough, because Aaron hadn't believed them.
Aaron Alckschild > DUDE COME ONE, im crying right now
Enia McCool > just send me the 600m and it's done
Aaron Alckschild > OH COME ON, it has to be acontract
Enia McCool > do you want the stuff or not?
Enia McCool > I guess you're not that interested...
Enia McCool > o/ fly safe next time
Aaron Alckschild > wait
Incredibly, even after Enia had lived up to her promise of killing Aaron, the carebear practically accused her of being a scammer. Where's the trust?
Aaron Alckschild > cant you just forgive me and give me the blueprints back for a price?
Aaron Alckschild > please
Aaron Alckschild > just make a contract for the 600m and ill pay it
Aaron Alckschild > with all the bpos
Aaron Alckschild > i need them, i really do
Aaron Alckschild > im just a peaceful guy playing with industry and stuff, i never pvp and suddently you come and take my stuff, PLEASE DONT DO IT
Aaron Alckschild > seriously I NEVER thought you could really do that for one second
In reality, everyone who engages in unlicensed highsec PvE is also a PvP'er. Everyone in highsec depends on the Code; it is a social compact, a mutual promise among all who dwell there. By violating the Code, carebears commit an aggressive act against all other players in highsec.
Aaron Alckschild > are you still there?
Enia McCool > yeah just got the stuff in 4-4
Aaron Alckschild > I CANNOT PLAY ANYMORE, this is horrible, I cannot believe you people do this .... everything and I mean everything I had was in that ship
Aaron Alckschild > PLEASE, are you going to give them back?
Aaron Alckschild > I know you must be laughing and having a good time fun, but I am devastated, I CANNOT AFFORD TO LOSE THIS!
Aaron Alckschild > Please help me out, I need those blueprints or I am out of the game because I cannot afford to lose this
Aaron Alckschild > You have no idea how much grinding work I had to go by to get those bpos
Carebears, grinding for isk will leave you feeling meaningless and empty. Especially when we destroy all the stuff you did your grinding for.
Enia McCool > now that I look at them, I think they're worth quite a bit more than 600m
Aaron Alckschild > ye they are
Enia McCool > more along the lines of 10b I reckon, you don't happen to have that on you, do you?
Aaron Alckschild > NO I DONNOT
Aaron Alckschild > I have right now about 1bil
Aaron Alckschild > I put all of my cash into building that blueprint inventory
Aaron Alckschild > IT TOOK A REALLY long time
Enia McCool > well, just talked to the other guys, they want to keep the stuff, 1b just won't cut it
Aaron Alckschild > well what the heck, how much do you want
Aaron Alckschild > i have a really bad headache right now
Aaron chose the wrong path in EVE and paid the price for it. Was there a way for the carebear to recover, or had his adventure in EVE come to an end?

To be continued...

Friday, July 24, 2015

The Rat Winked

Although we frequently celebrate New Order victories, and the fact that the CODE always wins, it's easy to forget that continually winning over time is itself a victory. The New Order has been winning for more than three years. What does that look like for the average bot-aspirant? As time goes on, more carebears experience being ganked over and over again.

Consider PieRatt, who has been a highsec carebear for six and a half years. He has suffered repeated losses to the New Order. That takes a toll. Finally, after many lost ships, he found a target for his anger: Agent Boarat Saagdiyev, who ganked one of PieRatt's Retrievers and, three days later, one of PieRatt's empty pods.


Two days after losing the pod, PieRatt began sending strange EVEmails to Boarat. Many New Order Agents have developed similar "pen pals". PieRatt challenged Boarat to go to the Peyiri system, the same place where Boarat had ganked PieRatt on the two prior occasions. Boarat declined to do so.


The next day, PieRatt sent another message, for no apparent reason.


Half an hour later, the situation became more clear. PieRatt was angry about losing a freighter in lowsec. Though Boarat was not actually on that kill, PieRatt now projected all of his problems onto him, and saw Boarat as the culprit.


Later that evening, PieRatt again EVEmailed Boarat, bragging that his freighter had been replaced. The invitation to join PieRatt in Peyiri was extended once more.


A week later, PieRatt renewed his one-sided correspondence with Agent Boarat. It became clear that PieRatt was one of those "I'm mining right now and you can't stop me!" types. He failed to absorb one of the great lessons of the Code, which is that our Agents are the ones who set the terms of engagement. We attack our enemies at the time and place of our own choosing.


When Boarat didn't appear in Peyiri, the carebear taunted our Agent. PieRatt couldn't understand that our Agents only show up when they feel like it. They may choose not to discipline a particular bot-aspirant at a given moment. Our most stubborn enemies sometimes take advantage of that fact to deliver taunts, as PieRatt did.


However, sometimes our Agents do appear after they have been taunted. PieRatt was flying his freighter through Peyiri when it was suddenly bumped by two of Boarat's friends, Failkin and Emelie Petra. Incensed, PieRatt challenged them in local to try ganking him.


Failkin left Emelie to continue bumping PieRatt's freighter alone. Failkin had other business to attend to. Specifically, he needed to change corps. Even more specifically, he needed to go join the 1-man alt corp that was currently at war with PieRatt's corp. Then he returned to say hello to PieRatt.


Failkin, flying a Skiff, was now at war with PieRatt. After destroying the Veldspar-laden freighter, the Skiff podded PieRatt for good measure. See? Mining ships can shoot back, when piloted correctly.


PieRatt attempted to log out, but his ship was destroyed anyway. He logged back in and sent another EVEmail. He knew Boarat was behind the whole thing.


PieRatt raged in Peyiri local. He cursed the New Order for its lack of intelligence.


Being ganked had taken its toll on PieRatt. He admitted that he'd already started petitioning us years ago. Having denied the petitions, CCP surrendered the game to his hated enemies. According to PieRatt, The WINKIES always win. AWAYS!


There are only two options for a carebear in PieRatt's position: Give in to the Code or give in to madness. PieRatt's choice was clear.