Previously, on MinerBumping... Agents Liek DarZ and Plasma Death made the acquaintance of a fail-fit Retriever pilot named Qila McClusky. Irritated at first, the gank recipient eventually seemed to absorb some advice about ship fittings, and she even became curious about how to acquire a mining permit. But the very next day, Qila was discovered mining illegally in Osmon, a popular ice mining system. When she was ganked for a second time, Qila raged in local.
Qila didn't bother with private convos. She wanted to turn the incident into a public referendum on the New Order and the Code itself.
Liek DarZ tried to reason with Qila, but she adamantly refused to accept the Code's prohibition against AFK mining.
The stakes were high. Osmon is a fairly well populated system, and everyone began watching local. Qila railed against the way EVE's PvE was designed. She hated the game mechanics, too. Maybe it was best that Qila quit, if she thought the game was that bad.
Liek encouraged Qila to stop using untanked Retrievers and buy a tanked Procurer. Once again, the miner refused to take any advice from our Agent. She hated the idea of flying a Procurer. She wouldn't be caught dead in one.
When Qila asked Liek to point to a "surviving Procurer" (by linking an anti-killmail, maybe?), sentiment in local turned in favor of our Agent.
As the conversation picked up steam, Qila casually mentioned that she wasn't a miner at all. She was really a prolific PvP'er who lost "hundreds" of ships. Yeah, it was obvious she didn't mind losing ships at all.
No matter how many times Liek or others in local offered Qila hints about how to mine safely, Qila refused to budge. She was a Goofus, through and through.
Earlier, Qila said that EVE's PvE was terribly designed and that she hated its game mechanics. Now, suddenly, she wished that it had millions more players because it was so amazing. Carebear logic.
Many carebears live in some kind of bizarro version of EVE that only exists in their imagination. In their minds, ganking is risk-free and highsec is too dangerous; PvP is too easy but highsec mining requires skill. In Qila's EVE, most players live outside of highsec. Also, no one has the power to boss you around in low/null/wormholes.
PvP expert Qila had a dilemma. The only way to afford PvP'ing was to spend all her EVE time engaged in AFK mining. Most carebears resolve this problem by not PvP'ing at all.
In Qila's mirror-universe EVE, highsec mining is the fastest way to make money. She admitted that she wasn't entitled to AFK income, but she wasn't willing to do anything else. But this still left an important question unanswered...
In a shocking twist, Qila revealed that she had known Agent Liek DarZ was in the system the whole time. In fact, she knew in advance that she was going to be ganked. It was all part of an elaborate trap--and Agent Liek had fallen right into it!
After nearly an hour of raging in Osmon local, Qila reaffirmed her decision to quit EVE. Could Liek DarZ somehow get this carebear to stop whining and start learning, even for a second? Or would CCP suffer the worst disaster since the time that other carebear quit?
To be continued...