Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Miner Rage Industries, Part 1

By now, most everyone has heard about CCP's plan to curtail awoxing and miraculously revive subscription revenues. However, even when a game mechanic is removed, its legacy may still be felt generations later. An awox performed in the name of the Code is a revolutionary act. Such awoxing operations instantly become legendary. The stories live on forever.


This week, we'll celebrate the legacy of awoxing by enjoying some never-before-seen reports about the courageous heroes who go forth into the darkness of rebel highsec industrial corps.


Agents of the New Order infiltrated Knightrage Industries, home of rebel Orca pilot Adam 187. Just as our Agents were trying to join his corp, another Agent started bump-tackling the Orca in an entirely separate gank operation. Highsec has become so thick with Agents that they can't help bumping into each other!


By chance or by fate, the bumper Agent's activities facilitated the awoxers. Adam knew he needed help to escape the gankers, so he eagerly admitted the awoxers into his corp and told them his location.


As the awoxers arrived, they noticed another member of Knightrage Industries trying to pry the Orca free from the bumper's clutches. It was then that Thomas Duncan and Kurisa Ongrard revealed themselves to be awoxers. They eliminated their fellow corp member and opened fire upon the hapless Orca.
Adam 1872 > what a dick
Adam 1872 > u really are a tool u awoxing peice of crap lol
Adam 1872 > u make me laugh
Kurisa Ongrard > I still have no idea whats going on
Adam 1872 > ok so im gona send that to ccp
Adam 1872 > thx
Adam was enraged. Instead of helping him escape, his corp's new members were shooting at him. He logged off his Orca pilot and used his alt, Adam 1872, to converse with his new corp members. He threaten to file a petition.
Kurisa Ongrard > dont petition me :3
Adam 1872 > all 3 of u aree getting petitioned
Kurisa Ongrard > i didnt do anything
Kurisa Ongrard > whats going on
Adam 1872 > u were there u had a piont on me
Agent Kurisa was still undercover as a doe-eyed newbie. But Adam wasn't fooled. Now that Kurisa was shooting him, Adam immediately deduced that Kurisa was trying to kill him.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > obviously theree is soem reason why this happened guys
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > maybe i didn't evaluate the situation
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > correctly to begin with
Adam 1872 > maybe ur a cunty
Adam 1872 > cunt!
Adam 1872 > u ever think about that?
Adam 1872 > i think u should
As long as the Orca remained alive, the awoxers maintained their cover. The Orca was taking damage, but wasn't dying yet.
Adam 1872 > u are an unskilled peice of crap
Adam 1872 > on the bottom of my shoe
Adam 1872 > im gona scrap u off on the gutter
Kurisa Ongrard > i think theres a huge misunderstanding here
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > please calm down friend I think this is just a misunderstanding
Adam 1872 > no there is no misunderstanding
Adam 1872 > u are a fuck wit
Adam 1872 > whats hard to understand about that?
Adam 1872 > its pretty strait forward really
The reason the Orca continued to live is that some local Anti-Gankers had been monitoring the ganking operation led by the bumper. When the awox went down, the Anti-Gankers used logi ships to remote repair the Orca--which, since it was tackled, remained in space despite Adam 187 logging off. Now the awoxers had to tell Adam an increasingly implausible story to explain why they were still shooting his Orca.
Adam 1872 > u prob tried 0.0 got ur ass handed to u buy real pvps and had to come up with a skeam
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > you started shooting my orca when we were doing the orca race you suggested
Kurisa Ongrard > i am new to this game
Adam 1872 > to make urself feel tough but really u just lowered urself to the lowest form of eve pvp ever
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I brought my orca out
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > for the race
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > and then you started shooting it
Agent TheInternet told Adam that the awox was simply retaliation for something that had gone down during an Orca race that Adam organized.
Kurisa Ongrard > TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet told me you tried to kill his orca after saying you would race him
Adam 1872 > mate no 1 is listeneing anymore
Adam 1872 > go eat a dick
Adam 1872 > race who?
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > why are you being so abusive to your felow capsuleers?
Adam 1872 > u are a bigger retard than him
Adam 1872 > racing an orca
Adam 1872 > listen to the verbal diarea coming out of that hole in ur face u call a mouth
Adam wasn't buying it. He didn't even remember the alleged Orca race. This was a case of awoxing, plain and simple. Our Agents were now in serious danger of having their cover identities exposed.
Adam 1872 > ur pathetic
Adam 1872 > u cant even awox properly
Adam 1872 > ahahahahAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
Adam 1872 > ur JUST A DICK AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Adam 1872 > EPIC FAIL
Adam 1872 > x10
As time went on and the Anti-Gankers kept the Orca repped up, Adam became increasingly confident that his Orca would be saved.
Adam 1872 > AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Adam 1872 > its a mining corp full of alts LMAO
Adam 1872 > and we all have another corp
Adam 1872 > ur the dick jokes on u assholes lmao
Adam 1872 > i told u
Adam 1872 > iam from FW
Adam 1872 > ahahahahaahahahahahaahahahahahahahaahahahaahaha
Kurisa Ongrard > im having second thoughts about joining this corp now
The situation became critical. Adam was convinced that he would escape justice. Would the heroic band of awoxers fail to kill the Orca? Would the Anti-Gankers score their first victory--and would the New Order suffer its first ever defeat?

To be continued...

30 comments:

  1. Kurisa Ongrard is almost vertainly a Veers alt

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh man, imma gonna get some popcorn for this one!

    Come on CODE. !!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Spoiler alert!

    http://eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=27035086

    Nice damage taken, though. Took them around 20 minutes to kill the Orca.

    ReplyDelete
  4. inb4 the antiganking/veers tears hits the comments section.

    its a shame veers lives up to the antiganking logic when he was mocking loyals real life situation :(

    ReplyDelete
  5. So let me get this right... after having immediately let in two known awoxers into his corp, Adam trusted the competence of the AG crowd, continued to pour vitriol claiming victory, and still lost his orca?

    What an idiot. What an irredeemable retard.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He may have been a bit premature in declaring victory... but we'll just have to wait for the next part in the series!!!

      Delete
  6. So is loyal off abusing his kids yet?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Miner, Is keeping you here commenting keeping you from abusing your kids?
      Because prevention of child/spousal abuse of angry miners was one of the founding principles of Minerbumping.com and "It's In The Code™."

      The Code always wins! Always!

      Delete
    2. Several mistaken assumptions:

      1. That I am a miner.
      2. That I am currently subscribed to Eve Online.
      3. That I have kids.

      This site primarily acts as my main caution flag. I read the new article every day, to keep myself from even considering returning to New Eden, by showing me the people I'd be joining. I will not give CCP money to populate a game with the likes of you. As a PvE-oriented sci-fi fan, I have found greener, safer, less "emergent" pastures to enjoy.

      Delete
    3. So leave minerbumping and never come back you worthless idiot? lol

      Delete
    4. Why would I leave? I love drama.

      Delete
    5. Totally agree with Anon1136. Every time I am tempted to actually play EVE, visiting this site cures me of it. But reading about it is fun.

      Delete
    6. And better yet? It's free! We stunt even have to be extorted for 10m ISK a year!

      Delete
    7. Ugh. Be less disgusting please, Anon@9:00. Being beaten by someone at a computer game is no reason to pretend they hurt their children.

      Delete
    8. Maria, I'm certain that Anon@9:00 is a perfectly nice person IRL, and is just beinga dick on the Internet.

      That's quite acceptable, right? It's how the New Order plays Eve, after all.

      Delete
    9. "Totally agree with Anon1136. Every time I am tempted to actually play EVE, visiting this site cures me of it. But reading about it is fun."

      All the drama of Highsec, without having to pay subscription fees. Sounds like a good deal to me!

      Delete
    10. @Maria and @Anon9:00AM

      I've discussed this before back when I was a EVE player. The reason they behave this way is that it's literally all they have. They can't beat us at a video game, over a period of years they have watched every single group that has tried to destroy us crumble into ashes - this is all they have left. Random trolling on message boards and personal insults.

      Versus getting better at the game or even understanding that it's just a video game in the first place, assuming that everyone who is better at the game then them must be some sort of sociopath or child abuser makes a lot more sense in the mind of the carebear.

      Anon @ 11:36 PM

      I actually admire your post. Versus assuming that EVE is just like every other carebear PVE MMO on the market, you did your homework and understand that EVE is a fully PVP game, and that it is not for you. A lot of our carebears could learn from you.

      Delete
    11. Anon@2:58, that is most emphatically *not* how the New Order plays Eve. The New Order is made up of people who, from what I've seen, are generous, caring people IRL, and they play as generous, caring people in-game. Our Agents set a new standard for classy behavior in their dealings with miners (as evidenced by pretty much every screenshot of a conversation on any post in this blog for the past 2+ years), and they selflessly give their time and money to helping improve the highsec community. They treat the carebears with respect, while also expecting them to adhere to the basic standards of conduct in highsec. That's pretty much the exact opposite of "beinga dick on the Internet".

      Evil triumphs when good men do nothing. It saddens me that when you see good men *not* doing nothing, working to clean up their communities and reform the worst offenders in them, you call that "beinga dick". But that's ok, the battle for hearts and minds won't be won overnight. The only certainty is that it will, eventually, be won.

      Delete
    12. We are the good guys!

      And because the good guys always win in the end, CODE. Always Wins!

      Delete
    13. only in your fantasy ming :)

      Delete
  7. Kurisa Ongrard > I still have no idea whats going on
    Kurisa Ongrard > dont petition me :3
    Adam 1872 > all 3 of u aree getting petitioned
    Kurisa Ongrard > i didnt do anything
    Kurisa Ongrard > whats going on

    LOL

    ReplyDelete
  8. I love how much james and the agents of new order work so hard to make up stories to look impressive. If only they would focus that into doing actual work instead..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We're glad you love it, and that you continue to frequent our excellent website to read about our daily victories in forcing detestable people to become better!

      You are welcome!

      Delete
    2. What victories ming? They are all made up stories, amusing, but made up.

      Delete
    3. Little-known fact: all API-verified Eve killboards are run by undercover New Order Agents. Anon@2:58/4:12 knows the truth!

      Delete
  9. Good that this garbage will soon be gone.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure they said the same thing when Helicity was (temporarily) permabanned.

      Delete
    2. You go ahead and hold your breath for that to happen Veers.

      Delete
    3. Given enough time they will all get banned. I agree with veers on this. Only one that probaly wont get banned is james, simply cause he never undocks anymore. He lets the fools of new order do the dirty work for him so he can claim he is innocent when someone gets harrassed by code.

      Delete
  10. Protip: Orca races never end well.

    ReplyDelete

Note: If you are unable to post a comment, try enabling the "allow third-party cookies" option on your browser.