We've wrapped up another week of suicide ganks by the New Order, and the competition was unusually fierce. Let's check out what made the cut for the week of June 16th @ 00:00 EVEtime through June 22nd @ 23:59 EVEtime.
We begin with xXDUESEXx's 434 million isk mining battleship. I thought we had made it clear in previous editions of Kills of the Week that we don't appreciate these things mining. If you buy a battleship, you need to use it for combat. End of story. Our Agents decided that if the Rokh wouldn't go to a combat zone, they would bring the combat to the Rokh. Capt Starfox, Ziaeon, xxBLACK SKULLxx 929, Ailish Liu, and xxLADY DEATHxx626 did well.
You might be wondering how a covops-cloaking blockade runner gets killed in highsec. Well, they're not supposed to. But Jon Obstergo thought it was a grand idea to flaunt his bot-aspirancy by relying on the safety of highsec: He sat directly on a gate, AFK. Agents Ziaeon, xxBLACK SKULLxx 929, and D400 reported to the scene and performed the kill, disregarding the gate sentry guns.
This Orca kill is very special. You know what the ultimate bot-aspirant act is? Giving out fleet bonuses AFK. Elisa Ebesis did what a lot of Orcas do: She sat on the undock of a station, AFK, to provide fleet bonuses for miners in the system. Regardless of whether or not you believe fleet bonuses should only apply to ships on-grid, Elisa's offense was outrageous. Aided by a bumping Machariel that bounced the Orca out of the station sentry guns' range, Agents Ziaeon, xxBLACK SKULLxx 929, Pestario Vargas, Capt Starfox, Maiki Dresin, Dante Lobos, D400, and Agent Trask pounced on the Orca. Agent Trask nabbed her 1.2 billion isk pod just to press home the point. Remember, folks, if your Orca idles on a station, it can still be killed.
Starstruck Wanderer lived up to her name when she went into shock after losing her 2.5 billion isk Orca and cargo. Agents Capt Starfox, Dante Lobos, Ziaeon, xxBLACK SKULLxx 929, D400, Maiki Dresin, Pestario Vargas, Sir Mack Inawrex, and Agent Trask did what needed to be done. For an instant reaction, Agent Lysergic Jackals infiltrated a channel that Starstruck was in, and asked her what was up.
Starstruck Wanderer > I thought they where there for my mackinaw
Starstruck Wanderer > then I saw my orca taking damage
Starstruck Wanderer > I was like.... wtf?
Lysergic Jackals > Maybe if you got one of those permit thingies they would leave you alone?
Starstruck Wanderer > wtf are you talking about?
Lysergic Jackals > This is what happens when you don't have a permit
Lysergic Jackals > ALL HAIL JAMES 315!
Lysergic Jackals > Would you like to join us in TS to discuss your permit plan?
Starstruck Wanderer > absolutly not
Starstruck Wanderer > fuck you and your permit
Starstruck Wanderer > shove it up your fucking asses
Lysergic Jackals > All of highsec is New Order space and owned by our savior James 315
Lysergic Jackals > I'm trying to help you, we had a good chat and I would like to discuss getting your ship back
Starstruck Wanderer > we do not negotiate with terrorists
Lysergic Jackals > We're not terrorists, we're agents and knights of the New Order
A lot of expensive Hulks died this week, but none more pricey than Quimera223's abomination, worth 1.6 billion isk. Agent Capt Starfox got the kill and received a rare blessing from the Loot Fairy: Every single module on the ship dropped!
Oh and hey, you guys remember that 700m isk Retriever from a few weeks ago? Well, hold onto your butts...
Do not attempt to adjust your monitor. Your eyes do not deceive you. Argus Krazni lost a 2.6 billion isk Retriever. Yes, this tech I mining barge worth more than a capital ship was mining, completely untanked, in a 0.5 security system. Here's the thing about systems with 0.5+ security status: They belong to me. They are New Order territory. The Code is law there. And do you know what they have in New Order territory? Agents. Agents like Sajun Benza, who enforce the law. If you break the law, the Agents of the New Order will break you. Don't be stupid. Follow the Code.