Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Nemesis, Part 1

In highsec, threats lurk around every corner.


Notice I said "threats", not dangers. The New Order gets threatened a lot, but is never in danger.


As it turns out, carebears are much better at making ominous comments than actually doing stuff that involves guns and explosions.


Then again, as the rebels remind us, all it would take to destroy the New Order is for one carebear to make good on his menacing EVEmails about ending the Code forever.


From the start, Alex Kevall seemed an unlikely candidate. He struggled to fill all of the modules in his Retriever. Making matters worse, Agents Minx Mattel and Lewak deprived him of his precious 573 million isk pod.


When Alex made his way back to his keyboard an hour later, he learned about the Code for the very first time. Would he take to it?


Alex seemed confused. He recognized that mining in highsec is a boring chore, but he felt he'd been unfairly treated by the gankers. He tried to deflect attention away from his own crimes, like a serial killer who says, "Why arrest the guy who killed 10 people when so many others have killed 20 and they're still on the loose?"


After considering the matter, Alex had no choice but to concede that there was a lot of truth in the Code. Unfortunately, he decided that everyone associated with the New Order would need to be annihilated. Too bad.


Within minutes, Alex was already formulating his master plan. He would unite all of the anti-Code factions and become an arms dealer on a massive scale. This, of course, was high treason. Agent Lewak told Alex that he had no choice but to inform the Saviour of Highsec about the dastardly plot.


Now that the wheels were in motion, the New Order regime was approaching its end. There was still a chance to dissuade Alex from wiping out the Code, but the price was a steep one: 15 billion isk, plus 32 million for the Retriever.


However, as everyone knows, the New Order doesn't negotiate with terrorists. Highsec's last chance for peace slipped away.


The next day, Alex renewed his correspondence with the Agents who had ganked him. Spending the night thinking things over didn't appear to have mellowed the miner.


The destruction of Alex's pod still rankled him. No, he would not be abandoning his vendetta. He was now fully committed to his plan. And this time, the vengeful carebear would see it through to the end.

To be continued...

22 comments:

  1. Because people who build capitals get there by mining in a single fail fit Retriever? lol. This Sperglord needs to be KoS until he rage quits.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmmmmm, that's an idea.

      Delete
  2. "No better than the shit I scraped off..."

    What a strange thing to say. Did you not look before you walked, blind careless care bear? What were you doing amongst the filth of others? And why scrape it off? That's the only friend you've got.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But isn't the Code agent a miner's best friend, truly?

      All they have to do is listen to us... but how do we get through to them. Oh yeah, Void S.

      Praise James! \o/

      Delete
    2. Miner: "I eat shit like you for breakfast."
      Agent: "You eat shit for breakfast?"

      Delete
    3. Anon 2:11... please try to be original, or at least give credit to the movie you stole it from.

      Delete
    4. Anon 5:15, sorry, I don't believe in supporting Adam Sandler movies.

      But, since you insist, the quote is transliterated from the 1995 Billy Madison movie, starring the aforementioned Adam Sandler in the main role.

      Delete
  3. NEW ORDER LOGISTICS KICKING MINER ASS!!!

    WOO HOO!!! YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Calm down faildo.

      Delete
    2. That wasn't even me! I like their enthusiasm though. :)

      Go NOL! Praise James! \o/

      Obsess much stalkeranon 12:59?

      Delete
    3. fail much faildo? Oh wait....always!

      You are still shitposting as an anon, must be SOP at the shitter school.

      Delete
  4. Oh, what a new exciting story we have here! I can't wait to read part 2.
    /Minx Mattel

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not enough spelling errors Anon, 2/10 nice try.

      Delete
  5. There's a strong correlation between the EVE player who announces their evil plans, and absolutely nothing happening.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Praise James 315 and his LGBTQ pride movement!!!!.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. U mad bro? Got ganked? Well, that's the price you pay for being a shitter in New Order highsec.

      Delete
    2. "Haha, let's call them gay, that will teach them!"
      (You)

      You do realize that adults are, in general, comfortable with the existence of non-heterosexual people and do not take it as a real insult when someone on the internet implies their support of the LGBT+ movement, right?

      Delete
    3. ag is actually a surprisingly anti-gay and homophobic organization. Very backwards, but you'd have to be pretty backwards to be a highsec miner amiright? Like being a moisture farmer on Tatooine.

      The New Order on the other hand is a progressive organization that believes in the equal rights for all of High Sec's citizens.

      Delete
  7. New Order Logistics is recruiting. Help win the war for High Sec. Apply now!

    ReplyDelete
  8. May the "Glourious" James 315 have mercy on this miner's soul.

    ReplyDelete

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