Thursday, August 10, 2017

The Solitude Investigation, Part 3

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent Bob the Fourth blessed the Solitude region with his presence and his blasters. As the Code-violating carebears crumbled, an anti-Code resistance developed. Then it, too, crumbled.


Agent Bob roamed the region, killing bot-aspirants at will. He thought little of destroying an unlicensed Prospect, but the Prospect pilot's alliance didn't forget it.


The SlayCore Partnership alliance was out for blood. How powerful was this new enemy of the Code?


To prove her PvP credentials, the rebel brandished a set of CONCORD killmails featuring the Galaxy farm.


Bob didn't like being threatened. He resolved to pay special attention to any vessels he spotted that belonged to The SlayCore Partnership.


Coyote Ford was the next to die. His Tristan-class frigate was no match for Bob's throwaway gank ship.


After Coyote Ford was vanquished, he urged his fellow alliance members to seek revenge.


...But The SlayCore Partnership's pilots were only qualified to get dunked.


Defeating so many enemies made Bob feel confident in his abilities and his Code. He had no idea that his most dangerous opponent had yet to reveal himself.
Bob the Fourth > well hello there
Abaddon Remillard > I like you enough to kill you nothing personal
Bob the Fourth > wouldn't have it any other way.
Bob the Fourth > you must have a few kill rights available by now
Abaddon Remillard > I like you I trully do but this is business
Abaddon Remillard > Do you play poker?
Then Bob encountered Abaddon Remillard. Unlike the rest of the carebears, Abaddon was interested in combat--and had every intention of handing our hero his first defeat.
Abaddon Remillard > Bob talk to me
Bob the Fourth > poker, no. never been that interested in gambling
Abaddon Remillard > How old are you?
Bob the Fourth > old enough to know better
Abaddon Remillard > Spoke like atrue gambler
Every good villain needs a gimmick. Apparently, poker was Abaddon's gimmick.
Abaddon Remillard > do you want to drag this out
Abaddon Remillard > "slow play"it.
Bob the Fourth > drag what out? I like it here
Abaddon Remillard > you have to go
Abaddon Remillard > simple as that
Unfortunately, the whole poker theme didn't really fit with anything. After one final attempt to shoehorn in a poker reference, Abaddon moved on to bigger and better things.
Bob the Fourth > ok, I assume you have heard of The Code.
Abaddon Remillard > I will kill you repetely until you leave
Bob the Fourth > Buy an alliance wide mining permit and follow The Code and I'll leave you alone
Abaddon Remillard > So are we going to drah this out or what?.
Abaddon Remillard > Suck my balls
Abaddon Remillard > Code is dead and you know it.
Abaddon belonged to the "Code is dead" school. He'd probably read something on Reddit about a heist or relevance or whatever.
Abaddon Remillard > Please Nigger.
Bob the Fourth > well, that's one opinion. the correct one however is that it's very much alive and well.
Abaddon Remillard > One opinion its every one's opinion.
Abaddon Remillard > You are like the Japenese fighter that belirves the Japenese empire has won,
The rebel urged Bob to give up the Code and embrace bot-aspirancy.
Abaddon Remillard > I've beeen killing those arseholes for years now
Abaddon Remillard > Really dude stop
Abaddon Remillard > Give up
Abaddon Remillard > The Emporah has fallen
Abaddon Remillard > James 315 what a wank.
Protip: Agents of the New Order never give up. They're winners, not quitters.
Abaddon Remillard > He is and always was a purse puppy.
Abaddon Remillard > To thw Mittani
Bob the Fourth > please miner, calm down and think about what you are saying
Abaddon Remillard > please nigger I stopped mining 2 yrs a go
Abaddon Remillard > Now I'm your worst nightmare
Until now, no one had been able to challenge Bob in combat. Abaddon was a different story. He claimed to have the power to destroy the New Order and its Code once and for all. Time for an epic showdown.

To be continued...

27 comments:

  1. So the Tristan was mining AFK?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Probably because the miner should have been able to warp away but then again we do not know how much a noob the pilot is. They did not have a mining permit either way so, KABLAAM!

      Delete
  2. The Salvaging Speed-Pimped Catalyst. New to me..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. New to you, but they have been around for years. Great for quickly salvaging combat sites after the rats have been cleared out.

      Delete
  3. https://zkillboard.com/character/91428089/

    160 "kills", 217 losses. Over 6 years. If that's Bob's worst nightmare, total Code Compliance is just upon us.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's just sad.

      Delete
    2. Those numbers sound more like one of your agents.

      Delete
  4. Abaddon is too vocal to be an effective anti-ganker. Those one's are always the first to die.

    Another great minerbumping story!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not in the slightest. When Alt 00 speaks out, it is always with the voice of reason, with conflict resolution at the heart of her every proclamation.

      Delete
    2. Sure keep telling yourself that.

      Delete
  5. Such a good compliant blog now that it is nerfed.

    Trolls still winning.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Still crying I see that's alright piggy you can be made into bacon too, just like all the other good piggies.

      Sorry your blog is nerfed but that is the price you pay for not doing it under the protection of the trolls. If you do not abide by the rules you get nerfed.

      Your better,
      Troll

      Delete
  6. Looks like code lost to Abaddon.

    Then again Bob couldn't win without passing the tests.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Note how casually but methodically the tension is raised during this piece. Astonishing. And what a cliffhanger! I'm seriuosly worried for Agent Bob!

    Over the years, citizens of the New Order were led to believe that James 315 embodies perfection. Yet I'm having the impression that His mastery of words is improving even further - if that's even possible.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Look at all these >1% trying so hard to be big time. Got to hand it to these agents they know how to act big. Of course its more they are delusional, but at least they try.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are you measuring our success by what percentage of new players CCP says quit due to ganking?

      /genuinely curious


      -Oink

      Delete
    2. Success is not something measured

      Delete
    3. No I'm actually going off the percentages that CCP stated makes u the gameplay, ganking accounts for 1% of gameplay and you are just a portion of ganking.

      So Code is less than 1% of gameplay.

      Also they reveal that miner who get ganked are 80% more likely to return to play while those who never get ganked most likely quit playing within a year.

      Your actually keeping miners mining.

      Delete
  9. Yet another miner in need of The Code. Abaddon Remillard latches onto a EULA-violating buzzword and drops it repeatedly for the shock value. What a Goofus.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lawrence is a goofus, Lawrence is a goofus.

      Delete
    2. > Anonymous August 11, 2017 at 12:40 AM said:
      > Waaaaah!
      Yes, he is similar to some of the anonymous posters on this site, just less cowardly.

      Delete
    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    4. So Professor, to you this is elite PvP. This is also roleplaying. So that means that you role play a character that is ok with killing unarmed people, now think about that.

      You can accept and play as a person who is actually perfectly fine and happy to promote killing unarmed people.

      A sandbox game allows players to express who they are deep down inside but do not do so in a public setting for fear of reprisal.

      That means you are in fact an actual person who is ok with killing unarmed people.

      Delete
  10. Galaxy Farm? Hey, that's me! :D

    -Oink

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yup a bunch of unintelligent animals ready for physical labor and slaughter.

      Delete
  11. I AM NOT YOUR NEGRO

    ReplyDelete

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