Monday, December 18, 2017

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 28

Previously, on MinerBumping... Mission Ready Mining corp suffered weeks of punishment at the hands of Agent Georgia B Dixie. Though the corp had thousands of members at its disposal, our Agent could not be stopped. Then, at the very moment Georgia stepped away from Gelhan, another bumper arrived to take her place: Agent Kalorned, back from vacation.

Kalorned calmly strode into the system and took his place at the top of the Gelhan hierarchy. Some of the miners were new, but others recognized him.

There was no resistance waiting for Kalorned in the asteroid belts, though MRM members were camping the entrance to the system. No matter. Kalorned's gank alts slipped through without incident.

Word of Kalorned's return spread quickly. Long-time veterans of the Gelhan siege knew what they were in for.

They say miner bumping is like riding a bicycle. Kalorned took to it easily. Our hero sent Flobadybop Amouh sailing out of the belt. She was so upset that she accidentally cursed at one of her fellow MRM members.

Kalorned was happy to pick up where he'd left off. But some things had changed in his absence. "Term 16" was all the rage.

Term 16 refers to a rule in the official EVE Terms of Service document, which reads:
"You may not do anything that interferes with the ability of other EVE Online subscribers to enjoy the game or web site in accordance with its rules. This includes, but is not limited to, making inappropriate use of any public channels within the game and/or intentionally creating excessive latency (lag) by dumping cargo containers, corpses or other items in the game world."
Some miners believe this rule outlaws bumping, because it interferes with a miner's ability to enjoy mining. Similar interpretations of this rule would outlaw taking another entity's space in nullsec if they enjoyed holding territory, or defeating another player in PvP if he only enjoyed winning.

Flobadybop was certain that she could space-lawyer her way out of being bumped. That strategy hadn't worked against Georgia B Dixie, but maybe Kalorned would see reason?

Our Agent politely informed the miner that she wasn't being harassed. That ought to settle the matter.

Flobadybop insisted that it was against the rules to diminish her enjoyment of EVE Online. As long as Kalorned was making her feel uncomfortable, he should be banned from the game.

Kalorned is no Johnny-come-lately to the Code. He knew that Flobadybop's subjective view of things wasn't authoritative; highsec has a Saviour for that. And Kalorned's copy of the Code said that miners need permits.

Flobadybop was forced to dock up in disgrace. Kalorned continued to bump miners and haulers at will. Annakazel resisted at first, but then ran away, leaving behind his drones as a tip for Kalorned's good service.

Agent Kalorned was somewhat surprised to see that MRM's "defense" of Gelhan hadn't grown more organized during his absence. If anything, it had deteriorated. Weeks earlier, they had fielded fleets of ships to try counter-bumping and yellow-boxing. Not today. Apparently Agent Georgia had broken them.

One after another, miners did nothing but complain about harassment and Term 16. Kalorned sensed that they were trying to build a case against him. But it didn't matter how many people accused him of harassment; only the truth mattered. Kalorned got his truth from the Code, and that meant the siege of Gelhan would continue.

To be continued...


  1. Ahh, Kalorned. One of Jamey's primary CHODE. slaves and member of the RL Bonus Room kabal.
    CCP must be getting desperate for revenue to let him back into the game.

    1. *munches popcorn*
      How does it feel to be a RL loser, social retard, and RL coward Anon 6:36?
      CCP must be really desperate to allow human scum like you in their game.
      *munches popcorn*

    2. little Johnny piddler363 got triggered. He's an RL child abuser though, like his hero kalynn. How could someone like john pirtle slip through the cracks so easily? He'll get caught piddling his kid too someday, and then we'll see how much he wants to be like shardani.

      I hope his family is safe.

    3. Never go full Shardani

    4. I've been running PI and becoming rich via the safety of my wormhole for several years now. Have never had to worry about the code or James 315.

    5. Good thing they're the New Order of HIGH SEC and not the New Order of Wormholes, huh?

  2. OH NO! Not the dreaded Term 16!

    Is this the end of CODE?!?

  3. wow just wow antigankers are failing so hard.

    never forget shardani

  4. Has anybody got shardani's frozen corpse?

  5. Never forget Gorila! ag was so toxic it ruined the game for him. Nd after he did so much for the ag "community", the way they turned on him was shitty, but expected.

    ag are such toxic people, in RL of course! Why does CCP allow people like that to harass the rest of us?

    1. Gorila Vengaza became a very accomplished Agent of the New Order.

  6. The Code always wins!

    And there's nothing those highsec carebear shitters can do about it except rage and cry and make RL threats that they would never have the RL balls to follow through on.


    1. That's not true.

      They can become more adept pilots, and improve themselves. I find that learning how to fly my ship well enough to handle Kalorned and Georgia's brand of "training", serves me all throughout EvE. There's a certain benchmark of skill needed, and of all Jame's agents, Kalorned is among the most forgiving; Fit your ship properly at the very least, and he's likely to leave it intact once he's done working with you.

      In short, as the CEO of MRMNG, I'm willing to be quoted as saying that simply becoming a better pilot will do you far more good in EvE than RL threats, or exchanging salt with the enemy.

    2. That's to say becoming Code compliant.


Note: If you are unable to post a comment, try enabling the "allow third-party cookies" option on your browser.