Sunday, December 9, 2018

Kills of the Week

If you're a miner, if you're a carebear, if you're a lover of bling--it's a really lucky thing that you're reading today's post. I have a great offer for you: Obey the Code, and you'll never wind up getting your loss featured on Kills of the Week. Still not enticed? Read on, and see what awaits you if you persist in your bot-aspirancy. From the week of December 2nd @ 00:00 EVEtime through December 8th @ 23:59 EVEtime:

I've always said it: It's not the ship, it's the man. Schweinorg Reinhardt mistook EVE for a pay-to-win game. "I have a supercap; how can I lose?" Carebears, if you don't have the Code, you won't have your supercap for long, either. Agents Kadesh Priestess, Soldier Forrester, Vordak Kallager, WaTeR Ubersnol, Mizhir, Turbo Crazy, D3LTTA, FistyMcBumBardier, Miyamoto Uroki, Casper24, Tawa Suyo, lady labia, NiXoR x, Intigo, TigR Kashada, Tiamat Key, Ithor Omanid, and Scotty Smartypants forced Schweinorg into the unenviable position of having to tell her nullsec masters that she lost a Nyx to a CODE. fleet. Two days later, someone else lost another Nyx. Supercarrier pilots beware.

Emelya-Che managed to throw away a Paladin in the Osmon system. You could criticize her for her fit, but don't bother--there's bigger fish to fry:

Agent Krig Povelli managed to kill the Paladin with his Orca. Emelya-Che lost her Paladin to a ship that "can't shoot back".

When it comes to bot-aspirant carebears, you can take the miner out of highsec, but you can't take the highsec out of the miner--the bad parts of highsec, that is. nm Kain was busy hoovering up ore in what he assumed was a safe system. Agents WaTeR Ubersnol, Intigo, Soldier Forrester, CtrlFreak, TigR Kashada, Miyamoto Uroki, l0rd carlos, Pete Tomaszewski, and Blaran Falsnar reminded him that there is no such thing as a safe system in EVE. But there was another reason why nm Kain in particular needed to be punished:

The trafficking of blingy mining drones is yet another reason why our Agents have expanded their operations in nullsec. That nasty stuff always finds its way into highsec--and it kills.

You gotta love those jump freighters with their safety buttons. By "safety button", I'm not referring to the mechanic added several years ago to protect carebears from accidentally CONCORDing themselves; I'm talking about a jump freighter's ability to instantly teleport to another system. However, as Safaya Rollixdk learned, jump freighters aren't idiot proof when their pilots are AFK.

Agents Australian Excellence, Tax Collector HongMei, Jared Kusion, Taxman Daniel, Tax Collector Max, Jaiden Kusion, Tax Collector BokChoy, Tax Collector Aruka, Tax Collector Stroheim, Tax Collector Hill, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Jax Kusion, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector Kittens, Turkey Baster, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector AynRand, Tax Collector Kimi, Jason Kusion, Tax Collector Alison, Tax Collector Larry, HSM MasterChief, and HSM Fleet Admiral defended the honour of Jita and took down the criminal.

Xadrian Murinar managed to lose even more--37 billion isk! Even the patrons of isk doublers rarely lose that much in Jita. But Xadrian, too, chose to go AFK in an expensive jump freighter. No doubt he'll start whining about unfair game mechanics.

Agents Taxman Daniel, Australian Excellence, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Tax Collector Kittens, Tax Collector HongMei, Tax Collector BokChoy, Tax Collector Aruka, Tax Collector Kimi, Tax Collector Stroheim, Tax Collector Max, Tax Collector Larry, Tax Collector Alison, Tax Collector Yuna, Tax Collector Shardani, Tax Collector Rachel, Tax Collector Hill, and Tax Collector AynRand sent in a nice fleet of Taloses to ensure the destruction of the Nomad. It was carrying, among other contraband:

You see what I mean about all of these blingy drones?

Going by his corp's name, Nabael is a miner. But Nabael proved that you don't need a mining ship--or any ship--to lose a bunch of isk. Nabael chose to AFK autopilot in a pod through highsec. He had 2.4 billion isk worth of implants before he was intercepted by Agent HANDY ST0NER SMURF.

It's a good thing he had that Slave set. Pods don't have much armor without them.


  1. Amazing work agents!!!

  2. James, Saviour of Null Sec!

  3. This poor bot-aspirant anon bear admires botting so much that he sees it as elite. Therefore, any form of elite PVP appears as botting to his blind eyes.
    The worst part is that all he can do is whine about it on our blog because no one reads the hisec militia blog.

  4. Calm down, CHODE. slave. Having your and Jamey's hypocrisy revealed is the first step towards redemption.

  5. Unable to come up their own content, ag is forced to parrot the words of our agents. Very telling indeed.

    Pity the poor miner.

  6. Calm down, Anonymous Coward @5:52pm.

    We all pity the poor CHODE. slave.


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