Sunday, April 6, 2014

Kills of the Week

The gankers of highsec have been inspired lately. We've got a lot of ground to cover today. In fact, some of the kills right along the edge of the week will need to be covered in next week's Kills of the Week post. Let's not waste any time. Here are some remarkable ganks from the week of March 30th @ 00:00 EVEtime through April 5th @ 23:59 EVEtime.



You know all of those "new players" the carebear apologists want to protect? baba Ataru is one of them. baba was only 11 days into the game when his Orca, packed with ice, got popped by Agents Sophia Soprano, Jared Lennox, Mildron Klinker, loyalanon, Sarthana, Hottentott, Capt Starfox, Jaxi Wreckful, Mad Fatchick Killer, Scylla ofMessia, Rollotamasi, and Nitetime Video. It might have been baba's first Orca, but it was fit like babby's first Orca. You see? Even 11 day-old characters have plenty of isk for a permit.



Nevris striker was awoxed by Agent Alexsus Neutralius Reppious. I was informed by Agent Relan Panacan that an anonymous Tengoo Uninstallation Service member was responsible for this awox. I don't want to unfairly profile anyone, but here's a tip for all of you background-checking corp recruiters out there: It's probably not a good idea to let someone in your corp if they have "Neutralius Reppious" in their name.


1 CTPAHHUK's Vindicator was held for ransom by Agent Kalim Dabo. It went boom, but that's not the only reason this story has a happy ending:


I'd like to welcome 1 CTPAHHUK, our newest shareholder. Thank you for your contribution!



Logistics pilots are so noble, always giving to others without asking for anything in return. Senity Artwik lost a 1.3 billion isk Scimitar to Agents Scylla ofMessia, Sarthana, loyalanon, and Sophia Soprano. Senity's crime? Going AFK in highsec without a permit, while in possession of a decadent, insufficiently-tanked ship. Before the carebears start crying tears for Senity's Scimitar, consider this: He was AFK for at least three hours before the kill. Maybe he was having trouble disconnecting. Our Agents escorted him to the nearest station by way of the pod express.



HiddenFire's mining Rokh was particularly disgusting. Agents loyalanon, Capt Starfox, Sarthana, Pestario Vargas, Scylla ofMessia, and Sophia Soprano didn't want any children to see, so they quickly removed it from Halaima. It gets worse, though. How new must this player be to fit a mining Rokh like that? Or to use a mining Rokh at all?


A month from now, HiddenFire will have been mining in highsec for 10 years. Brutal.


HiddenFire, put a tank on your ships, and for goodness sake, put some clothes on. We're trying to make highsec decent. Don't you know there are children as young as four years old mining here?



Back to basics! Aragony lost a minimalist Mackinaw to Agent Sarthana. Notice anything missing? You guessed it--no permit.

19 comments:

  1. Incursion scimitar. The sheer decadence.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Incursion bears need to die, they are taking the modules that should be used for funsies in pvp to fuel their filthy carebear hobbies.

    Revolting!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Then come and kill me. I'm an incursion bear and proud of it.

      Delete
    2. Filthy carebear hobbies? You mean like taking a shit and filling your mouth with it? lol

      To James 315: You must have diarrhea of the mouth with all the shit that spews from it like a fountain.

      Delete
    3. You have an odd obsession with fecal matter.

      Delete
  3. Holy geez, how do you get an Orca, 11 days into the game?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. BeBopAReBop RhubarbPieApril 7, 2014 at 9:04 PM

      I'm wondering this too. Last time I looked it was around a months training time. I assume cerebral accelerators and +5 implants were involved.

      Delete
  4. Carebears forever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Right on.

      I salute CCP's decision to slam Erotica 1 with the mighty banhammer.

      Delete
    2. I salute James 315's decision to make Erotica 1 take it in the ass.

      Delete
  5. ↖(^▽^)↗ Made kills of the week!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sometimes I think those killmails are faked :P I mean seriously, people actually fit their ships like that? LOL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They are faked. Look at it this way. You cannot get into an Orca in 11 days. It's impossible.

      Delete
    2. Could have been someone who bought a character on the bazaar trying to pay to win, I have seen some quite hilarious kill mails from players like that.

      Who the hell goes AFK in a 1B+ incursion fit logi?

      The very first Orca on this article is a perfect example of what I'm talking about, it isn't even fit. How much damage did it take about 50k? My production alt's orca I use for hauling has over 250k EHP... But then again I take the time to properly fit the ships that I fly.

      Delete
    3. the orca was clearly an alt account, you can train into an orca in 10 days if you know what you're doing.

      and Asia, buying a character maintains the characters age, it doesn't restard it.

      Delete
    4. Anon 3:29:

      If you bothered to check the kill mail, it is API verified. It is possible, but it's clearly a focused alt.

      Delete
  7. Talk about taking out the trash! Well done agents.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I have taken note to a very serious issue regarding this post.

    The player 1 CTPAHHUK has a Russian profile. So I got curious.

    http://iskspot.com/ -> 188.143.234.61
    http://iskbank.com/ -> 176.99.6.185

    BOTH Russian IP's. BOTH illegal isk services. BOTH would utilize bots and AFKers.

    Coincidence? Possible, except I have seen many others that have been ganked and a good share of them had guess what, RUSSIAN PROFILES! Seen several insane multiboxers, with guess what, you guessed it, RUSSIAN PROFILES!

    Not profiling here, but if it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck.

    Keep up the good work. Troll till they quit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. lol Eric, you are a very special snowflake. Don't ever change.

      Delete

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