Thursday, December 3, 2015

Crazy Like a Foxbolt, Part 13

Previously, on MinerBumping... Admiral Foxbolt stepped onto the battlefield of EVE-O and made his case to the people in an "apology" thread. He was soon overwhelmed by the crowd and put on trial for his life in EVE. Not a single player was persuaded by his arguments or pacified by his apology. Foxbolt was on his own. One man dared to stand, alone, in defiance of the galaxy.


Nearly two hours had passed. Foxbolt continued to defend his actions, but the battle was taking its toll. His only solace was the secret knowledge that he possessed a trump card--a weapon he hoped he'd never need to use.


The hydra-headed forum community wouldn't be slain. After each heroic blow, Foxbolt wiped his brow only to find more attackers popping up.


EVE-O was transfixed by the spectacle. Foxbolt's tank was buckling under the strain--and a total implosion couldn't be far off.


Fatigued, the forum warrior continued to fire off as many replies as he could. No matter how exhausted he was, Foxbolt knew he had to remain focused on his goal. He made every effort to avoid lashing out at his attackers. He didn't hate them. He knew they were all pawns of The Mittani.


Yet the EVE-O community showed no signs of letting up. Foxbolt's attackers were equally convinced of the righteousness of their own cause.


The thread was approaching the two-and-a-half-hour mark. Though he still hadn't won a single supporter, Foxbolt began to feel as though he was winning. The absence of anyone from the ISD or CCP was striking. Could it be that CCP Falcon had accepted his apology and was lifting his ban?


Foxbolt had hoped that if people weren't persuaded by his words, they would be convinced by his actions. No such luck. Cynicism prevailed.


Even a lion has his limits. Foxbolt's tank was disintegrating. He would enter hull soon.


But he wouldn't quit yet. Not while his thread was still open. The battle raged.


A hopeful sign: A neutral entered the thread for the first time, choosing to wait for more evidence before picking a side.


Against all expectations, Foxbolt was getting his second wind. Second winds aren't always pretty, though.


Nearly three hours had passed. Foxbolt still believed in his idea of being paid real-life money by his corp members, and everyone else was still against him. After all of the chaos and tumult, had nothing been accomplished?


A new element was introduced. Before Foxbolt could develop his ideas further...


CLANG. The ISD finally showed up and shut Foxbolt down. His invaluable line of communication to the EVE community was severed. It was settled, then. Foxbolt would need to play his final card, his ace in the hole. Would it succeed? Would Foxbolt's permaban be lifted, and would he get CCP's blessing for his mission to serve as a quasi-official community sheriff? Or would Foxbolt's secret weapon turn out to be useless, causing him simply to flame out one last time?

To be concluded... in the most shocking MinerBumping episode yet!

32 comments:

  1. mental melt-down.

    ReplyDelete
  2. And people wonder why Code. destroys highsec corps.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. who wonders that?

      Delete
    2. Well, in rare this case, I have to agree with CODE.

      BM

      Delete
    3. BM, You have been "agreeing with CODE" a lot lately. Why don't you just join us? Butthurt Miner would be a great name for a gank toon. And we have cookies.

      Delete
  3. Lions. Don't. Run.

    ReplyDelete
  4. If this is how CODE destroys highsec corps, then I hope they last for 1000 years. Amazing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm really close to cumming, hope I can hold out for the last installment :) :) :) 8=====D~~~~~

    ReplyDelete
  6. Eh could have just read the forum thread and skipped the last two days, but I am looking forward to the conclusion...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Antigankers are failing so hard right now while the Code is winning non-stop daily!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Antigankers are winning so hard and Code is failing non-stop daily because all i do is suck cock and get raped by daddy in the ass instead of improving.

      Delete
    2. I can't stop Code because they're too good so I just imitate members and whine like a bitch. Always!!

      Delete
    3. Real Fake Wolf SopranoDecember 4, 2015 at 3:00 AM

      I talk about homosexuality like it is a bad thing and I make jokes about rape and child abuse. I do it to get attention and show everyone how cool the anti-ganking community is.

      Delete
    4. The Verified Fake Wolf SopranoDecember 4, 2015 at 5:11 AM

      Will the real Fake Wolf Soprano please stand up!

      Delete
  8. Does it end with him sticking a railgun in his mouth and pulling the trigger? I feel this guy is capable of hurting himself because "we just don't get it."

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  9. Please James you tease, My Dick can only get so aroused.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Then blow your load early and pull out. She won't mind if you cum first and leave her to fend for herself. No, really.

      BM.

      Delete
    2. Really? That happens to me all the time and they don't seem please. They call me 'minute man' :(

      Delete
  10. ... it was fourteen.

    Fourteen episodes long. The Saviour always never fails to impress me.

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  11. This Foxbolt guy. Holy shit yes! Nathan G Newsome, if you are able to internets from whatever shithole you are in now and are reading this, just let me say, you are not insane. What you are is a mealy mouthed, low IQ, wannabe little scamming cheat that got caught.

    Fuck you, i am glad you are banned. That means i am not subjected to you misspelling 'thread' every fucking time, and half the other shit you type.

    You really are a world class asshat. Please stay the hell outa EvE, the community does not want you and i think CCP expressed the same opinion when they banned you, again.

    If you like you can take the rest of the anti-ganking pussys and go play some themepark mmo, where you can finally be a hero!

    .I..

    ReplyDelete
  12. 40 keks. Anti-ganking winning again.
    https://zkillboard.com/kill/50496289/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. so so podkill, but that meme is fucking retarded.

      Delete
    2. what is it carebears like to say. EH MHER GHERD shoot something that can shoot back noob!!!

      Delete
  13. Anti-ganking wins again. Anti-ganking always wins.
    This weeks most valuable pod loss brought to you by ChODE - 1.64bn isk.
    https://zkillboard.com/kill/50502647/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha look at how angry and belittled CODE. has made you, fishing for table scraps on your worst enemies that you made yourself by not paying our reasonable price of 10 million isk.

      Such a pitiful subhuman.

      Delete
    2. People who post as 'Anonymous' fail automatically.
      Deal with it.
      -------------
      Mike Adoulin

      Delete
  14. It's like one of my Telenovelas

    ReplyDelete

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