Thursday, February 11, 2016

People Who Scare Away New Players

Every gank is a gift. It's an opportunity for a miner to prove, through his reaction, that he's worth keeping as a member of the EVE community. We all know that AFK miners add nothing to the game, but if they're willing to turn their lives around, they can begin to contribute.

Meet Marxus Toralen. Despite logging three years in the game, he was mining in highsec with an untanked Hulk. Agent Zopiclone gave him the gift of gank. Would Marxus rise to the occasion? Or would he flame out like a Goofus?

Hmmm. Not much to go on.

Zopiclone had to admit that the first signs weren't very encouraging. It was time to move this conversation to Scheenins local chat.

In local, sometimes a carebear will tone down his language to avoid embarrassing himself in front of others. That wasn't Marxus' style.

Marxus bitterly accused Zopiclone of driving people away from EVE. Unlike Marxus himself, who's a real people-person. Dealing with someone like Marxus is a real draw for potential EVE players.

The miner threatened to quit EVE, apparently for at least the second time. Accused of racism, Marxus casually reassured Zopiclone (and everyone else in the system) that he used racial slurs in a non-racist way. Maybe Zopiclone was the real racist, for jumping to conclusions?

Marxus wasn't one of those rebels who claim that the New Order has no effect on highsec; he was of the school that believes we're solely responsible for the decline in EVE subscriptions. This bothered him, because apparently it's more enjoyable to AFK mine when lots of other people are also AFK mining.

The miner placed all his hope in CCP. Nothing else could stop the New Order. What, are the Anti-Gankers chopped liver? (No, even chopped liver wins some of the time.)

Marxus launched into an impassioned speech about how much he loves EVE and EVE players. The New Order ruins the game for people who want to AFK mine and use racial slurs in a non-racist way.

If he cares so much about the newbros, why did Marxus only begin complaining about the Code after he lost his Hulk?

Marxus concluded his rant with an unintentional indictment of the mining mechanics. Still, he believed the game would be more fun with more players. Who wouldn't want to hang out with a bunch more people like Marxus Toralen?


  1. Unrepentant carebears are just so much more entertaining.

  2. AG is like chopped liver in that they both get eaten for dinner and have terrible taste.

  3. "Marxus wasn't one of those rebels who claim that the New Order has no effect on highsec". I don't know of anyone that would claim that. Negative? Most of them. Positive? Some of them surprisingly. No effect at all? I've not heard that one.

  4. Looks like antiganking failed incredibly hard nonstop for ANOTHER day!!!

  5. The sooner CCP removes mining as a method of play, the better it will be for the entire game. Getting pilots out of AFK play by introducing things like NPC hauling will be a step forward to rewarding active player interaction. We all know that the PvE is stale and resorts in a low retention rate; mining is the frog that boils out players out of eve.

    1. I agree about the mining, but NPC hauling would be problematic. If NPC hauling can't be ganked, it removes a very important dimension from the game.

      If it can... NPC AI is stupid. Nobody would use it because every single freighter would die. If it were the only option moving resources would be effectively impossible.

    2. So NPC hauling would be no worse then most of the current player haulers.

    3. Have you ever tried NPC /PvE Hauling missions. Man they are the pits. Try and mine out in Null Sec is more fun. You have a proper corp. You have intel. You have team speak and you still engage with players even though your in a mining fleet and when a neut jumps in we warp to PoS.

      You cannot remove mining. Where would the minerals come from to build stuff that gets blown up?

    4. the mining mechanic in Eve has always been shit. boring, lame, and not really even improved from 2003. Earth and Beyond did mining better in 2002 and had walking in stations.

    5. remove mining, seed the market with npc mineral orders.

    6. @Anon4:29

      The Mining mechanic in EVE has always been shit; because it was intended to be a mechanic that made worse players become food for better players.

      It's supposed to be boring; it's supposed to not be worth much, in comparison to better, more risky endeavors, and it is supposed to be a punishment for anyone who lacks the vision to pursue more in EVE.

      And we in the New Order are tasked with carrying out that punishment on these short-sighted fools, so that they may benefit from our superior wisdom.


  6. You know who we haven't seen or heard from in a while? Faildo Rain. He must have failed like the rest of the AG "community".
    Also, what about those guys "Mordus Angels" who were supposedly going to take down Goons. Zkillboard might go down all the time, but it doesn't lie.

    GF, carebears... Now get a permit or get rekt.

  7. Like I have always said; The New Order is the most Stalwart defender of the EVE Community.

    We are its foremost Guardians; the cadre of people who determine, through the great Code, who should be allowed to play this game and who are not worthy.

    If you aren't wise enough to deal with the New Order, you are not wise enough to survive in EVE, and your time would be better spent playing another game. We are the "gardeners" of this community, making sure that the foul weeds cannot rise up and strangle that which makes our community worth living in.

    And we do it at a discount, too.

    What a valuable service the New Order provides!

    1. Ok anonymous poster, I will finally bite - why do you continue to post this link over and over? All agents of the New Order are aware of how to fit a catalyst, and are aware of what web page to go to if they forget. Is there some point you are trying to make?

      You can just tell us how you really feel, you know.

    2. If you notice he posts that everywhere Ming posts. It probably is a fail attempt at a Ming never undocks troll.

      I think it is the same guy who posted "Meh seems made up" and "Knock, Knock" in every post as this seemed to have stopped with "Fit your Cat" anon...

    3. If there is anything, it seems that I have trolled said poster into focusing on me, instead of the Saviour, James 315. It would seem that since he could not defeat the Saviour through his tactics of annoyance posting, he decided to go after me, laughably thinking that he could deter me from posting.

      And already, he is starting to flag and fail. Just as Anti-ganking ALWAYS does!!!!

  8. I think the game that he loves and the actual game he is playing are two completely different things.


Note: If you are unable to post a comment, try enabling the "allow third-party cookies" option on your browser.