Monday, July 25, 2016

The Birth of Civilization, Part 1

EVE players from all walks of life look upon the achievements of the New Order and marvel. Before the New Order, everyone considered the idea of changing highsec to be absurd, an impossibility. Now they know better. But they still yearn for a better understanding of how such change occurs.

Consider the Abudban system. It suffers from the presence of ice and its close proximity to the Rens trade hub. Abudban's cruel geography seems to guarantee that its inhabitants will fall under the influence of bot-aspirant culture and all the ills that come with it. Only an Agent of remarkable integrity and fortitude could ever hope to plant the seeds of civilization there.

Luckily, the New Order is home to such Agents. Known best for his victories in the vicinity of Gamis, Kalorned decided to take a trip to Abudban. The things he saw and experienced there will be the subject of this series. Given the historic nature of this mission, Kalorned saw fit to give the readers of MinerBumping an unprecedented look into the mind of an Agent. From time to time, we'll read his own thoughts, in italics, as he wrote them in his journal.

Inspired by recent stories on concerning Vrix Nation and their search for intelligence in highsec, I got the idea of engaging in a safari of my own. I'm not sure there was anything in particular I was searching for. I more felt that I needed to just be--amongst the miners, to interpret their thoughts and actions towards a vague and mysterious understanding on my part.

It didn't take long for Kalorned to make first contact with the miners. No thanks to them, of course; they remained silent even after he greeted them in local. Fortunately, Kalorned was traveling along with his merry band of gank alts. A halfheartedly tanked Mackinaw was the first to die.
Remyo > Fuck you Kalorned
Remyo > I was not AFK and you know it well
Kalorned > Why didn't you respond to me in local then?
Kalorned > The Code states that miners must acknowledge agents in local
Kalorned >
Remyo > Right. But now I know you are an asshatter
Remyo > Blocking you now
I was simply reciting the law to him and yet I was called an "asshatter". It's an interesting term, combining a derogatory "ass" with "hatter", a partial break-off of the descriptive term "mad-hatter" which is used to insinuate that someone is crazy. I suppose this must've been a fancy way of saying that I'm a crazy ass. Interesting.
Azure Momaki > Kalorned But you're not one of his agents. You clearly said earlier that you're not afiiliated with CODE.
Azure Momaki > Kalorned > technically im not code
Azure Momaki > So, you didn't have you respond
Kalorned > I'm not CODE, I am a New Order of High Sec agent however
I'm always impressed that CODE. has been so successful it often outgrows its position as just one branch of The New Order of Highsec. Often times the miners think that CODE. is the only entity that exists. It's tiring having to re-explain the greater structure, and I often feel it falls on deaf ears not interested in listening. I persevere, though, and remind them nonetheless; such is my responsibility.
Remyo > Besides, Kalorned knows very well I am helping in Rookie Help and talkig there, not in Local
Remyo > So that attack was more personal nature than "code roleplay"
Shaun Thiesant > sounds like it
Remyo > Code does not like me helping noob avoid their ganks
Remyo > Simple as that
For some reason, Remyo assumed that Kalorned was familiar with his work in the Rookie Help channel. If Remyo really was busy helping newbies avoid ganks, he was obviously a bad role model. Would you take gank-avoidance lessons from a guy who was ganked in a yield-fit Mackinaw?
Kalorned > Stop being sore losers friends
Kalorned > You've all lost at elite PVP tonight, it's ok
Kalorned > I'm an agent, I always win
Kalorned > No need to be mad that you lose to me
Shaun Thiesant > Oh I am not mad
Azure Momaki > Neither am I
Why do the miners always complicate things? We have a law, they broke the law, they were caught and subsequently punished. It can't be that hard to fathom, can it? The locals asserted that they weren't mad, either--a sure sign of being mad. I needed to try and calm the situation. Maybe I introduced myself wrong?
Remyo > Kalorned merely showed his true colours
Remyo > He is Code
Shaun Thiesant > In the grand scheme of things, all you did was kill a pixelated ship homie
Shaun Thiesant > go be a real boy and get outta your mommy's basement
Kalorned > And also made high sec better
Remyo concluded that Kalorned's true allegiance was to the Code. A little time spent on MinerBumping could've taught him that lesson--and for less than 238 million isk.
Shaun Thiesant > sure
Shaun Thiesant > fuck stick
Azure Momaki > Don't step too high on your kiddie stool.
Shaun Thiesant > or would you prefer shit bag?
The Abudban miners were an unruly bunch. Their mood didn't improve after having witnessed a Code enforcement Agent kill one of their brothers. The shooting was entirely justified, but they didn't see it that way. They were close to rioting.
Kalorned > I personally prefer Mr. K
Kalorned > That was a good name a miner gave me one time
Shaun Thiesant > k regurgitated cum bubble
Outy > wow
Shaun Thiesant > if he wants grief, feed him grief
Local was only getting more agitated. I tried relating to them with a name given to me by one of their own, but the tactic hadn't yet borne any fruit. Perhaps I could just make an earnest and naked plea for peace.
Kalorned > I only want peace and harmony in High Sec
Kalorned > If only every miner would see the benefit of an orderly, compliant high sec
Azure Momaki > Oh, yeah Daddy., Work the shaft.
Azure Momaki > You gotta suck a little harder for us to have peace and harmony
Shaun Thiesant > yeah orderly and words hurt with safe spaces bullshit
Shaun Thiesant > fucking millenials
Years of bot-aspirancy and a rampant neglect of highsec's law had resulted in the deterioration of the very fabric of Abudban society. Most people would look at the situation and call it hopeless. The world had given up on these miners. Would Kalorned abandon them, too?

To be continued...


  1. Wow. antigankers still failing to protect miners. get gud! XDXDDXDDDD

  2. Miners in groups generally resort to crude ad hominem attacks when one of them gets ganked. They are almost never interested in discussing the causes. I would have given this group up for a lost cause, so I am eager to see how Agent K deals with them.

    1. The cause is not hard to figure out. The cause is a sociopathic asshole like Lawrence or Wolf who is out to ruin someone's day for laughs while using a so called mining permit as a RP device to make it seem legit.

    2. Let's be honest - those "crude ad hominem attacks" aka "tears" are even more important to code gankers than kills itself. Are you seriously implying that other groups - like pvp players always behave in mature way and never react in ad hominem way?

    3. Anon 818, friend.
      CCP says it's legit to sell permits and gank scummy carebears. Who are you to say otherwise? Oh that's right, a cryanon, you don't count

    4. I didn't say that all non-code PvPers are mature. Take Mittens for example. He advocated driving another player to suicide. Then again, most code members are goonie alts, so the goons are a bunch sociopathic assholes as well since they are played by the same people. Tell me, how is World War Bee going?

  3. Wah wah Code wankers jerking each other off on these forums daily. Code is highsec carebears incognito.

    1. Yet you visit us daily to whine and post your drivel. You should write a story about it and post it on the anti-ganking blog that no one reads.

    2. Wahh wahh nitetime you robot non original responder. Get some new lines.

    3. That whineanon is not even trying. BM is giving up under the constant onslaught of ..... civilization.

      Why is it miners resort to foul language when they fail? That does not promote good sportsmanship. EVE would have so many more players if CCP could remove miners like the ones featured here.

      It is time to say "no more!"

      We need to take back hisec from these nasty hisec miners. Complete removal of hisec is the only option, no more shelter for terrorists!

      If you love your null/low home, you must take the fight to the savage carebear, before they overpopulate and destroy the last great bastion of sandbox pvp!

      Make EvE great again! James 315 for CSM!

    4. I don't like code, but you sound like a retard or little child. Or some code member trying to troll anti-gankers.

    5. 1119: I think he is BM's lost puppy dog who follows him around on the forums.

  4. But where oh where is Ming?

  5. I stopped using webber frig when flying freighter from Jita to other trade hubs because I rarely meet CODE on my way lately. Usualy it's 1 or 2 players in some 0.5 system, but often there are no CODE pilots at all.

    I'm really sorry about the death of New Order, you did good job at providing shelter for those who are not capable of normal PvP, but still in a need of attention and some kills.

    1. Yet you still post anonymously out of fear of being hunted or targeted.

    2. Lol, these anon miner lies

    3. Ohhh yummy tears Nitetime. We are just using the system they you guys put in place. If you got rid of Anonymous you would also see 1/2 of these shit posts are from you and your friends!

    4. Oh shit, CODE. is dead?!?

      *checks zkill for July 2016*

      Hey wait a minute...


    5. at AnonymousJuly 25, 2016 at 7:24 PM

      You call those several kills per day a sign of healthy, alive alliance? Would you be kind and check killrate exactly one year ago, to compare apples to apples.

  6. the only good miner is a rekt miner

    1. "Get a permit, or get rekt"

      Words to EvE by.

    2. Its "Get a Permit and get Rekt". Previous post showed that. Ohhh the font is a tad too small... could get ganked again. Maybe the new order needs a group vision program, along with a head CT scan.

    3. then why do you keep pink mining laser under your sofa?

  7. Thanks for your tears 643.
    It seems you support ag and hisec miners. Why be a child molestor? You can do better.

    The CODE always Wins! Always!
    Remove hisec tody! Save EVE from scummy pedophiles!

  8. Lol 643 is either Shaun or Azure, or both. Keep your kids away from those pedos!

  9. We here at AG are human beings and we abhor IRL violence, regardless of what the miners say when they are ganked. Although, recently an AG member offed himself and his kid, this is the exception and not the rule. We play this game for fun. It is just that our definition of fun is different than yours. We are also not those sicko pedophiles like James, Wolf, Lawrence, and Nitetime are. We are just your normal everyday people who play a game.

  10. The only possible way to know they are RL child molesters is to be molested by them. I'm sorry about your experience.

  11. Hey anon 1031
    It's too late to backpedal and make excuses. If you support hisec miner carebears then you support RL violence and in game nasty attitudes.

    Choose a side, so-called "white knight". But don't complain or make excuses when you are lost in the crowd of nasty paedophile child murdering hisecc carebears, it was your decision to side with them.

  12. This is the minerbumping site, if you carebears want to make excuses for you and your kind, go to the childmurdering site. Or the kiddiepiddiling site. We don't believe anything you crybears post here.

    Get rekt hisec miner pedos!


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