Sunday, July 3, 2016

Kills of the Week

Imagine the highsec of the future as a paradisiacal garden. That's our goal. To get there, we'll need to remove the weeds and thorns of bot-aspirancy and carebearism. Anything less than perfection would ruin the whole experience. (Which would be bad for retaining new players!) Here are some examples of the imperfections our Agents removed during the week of June 26th @ 00:00 EVEtime through July 2nd @ 23:59 EVEtime.



"But they never warned me about the Code!" So much for that excuse.


Duly warned freighter pilot Feanor Arthie lost 20 billion isk while transporting a Fortizar in a triple-anti-tanked Obelisk. Feanor's name and modus operandi have produced much speculation about a possible connection to the notorious X-FEANOR. Our Agents seek the truth no matter where it leads. Feanor was brought to justice by Agents Daki Senpai, Nullus Modus, Lawrence Lawton, Miros Homar, BAE B BLUE, SynthiaGreey, Etrisa, Oryae Veris, Fabulous Andy, Logical Fallacy, The O'Reilly Factor, Yvain Bluewater, Ricki Lake Show, Jack Fizzleblade, Hermann Fizzleblade, BAE B PEW, Nin Rin, Unwarranted Assumption, Logical Fatality, Prixm Wind, Hayley, Miner Compliance Officer, Franz Fizzleblade, Archibald Fizzleblade, Gendo a, Zaand Schtvaal, Surprise Cargo Extraction, Gendo e, Pika Pew, James Poddington, and Zentar Brigs.



Roderick Cruz's contribution to the latest edition of the Highsec Miner Grab Bag is elucidated by his blingy Mackinaw loss. Agents Krominal, Kibbera, and Keraina Talie-Kuo were astonished by the miner's willingness to risk 829 million isk in an untanked ship. (His excuses were unpersuasive.)



Take a look at DriftSlime Arnst's Tengu fit. See if you can arrive at an estimate of the Tengu's DPS and its active tank EHP boost per second. Take a moment if you'd like; the rest of this post will be here when you return. Ready? The answer to both is zero, for the man-bot was AFK. Agents from highsec's first family did what they do best. Jason Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Justin Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jake Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Joel Kusion, and Joseph Kusion, highsec thanks you.



Two kills from a busy previous week. First, AgentSnuggles007 Sirtobie ticked all the boxes with his mining Mammoth. We've got a cloak, a single mining laser, an absence of tanking modules (or any midslots, for that matter), and some odd choices for rigs. How to make this ensemble complete? Autopiloting on AFK will get you close. What's missing? Ah, yes. A PLEX in the cargo. Agents Rick Therapist, Carebears' Nightmare, and Brutal Anna added one more ingredient--a nice, big explosion.



G'Kars Hope was a conflicted carebear. He used some tanking modules, but he allowed himself plenty of indulgences, too. Friends, if you're going to comply with the Code, go all the way. Agent CaptainBRO is beginning to make a name for himself by targeting Code violators in industrial ships. Did he score a PLEX kill here?


No. Instead, the hauler was moving more than a billion isk worth of compressed ore. You can probably guess whether any of that was mined with a valid permit.



The remaining shuttle autopiloters are coming under more and more scrutiny. Larsol stuck out like a sore thumb and was easily intercepted by Agent Lucia.


Carebears, check your implants. If you don't want to end up like Larsol, you know what to do.

27 comments:

  1. In b4 wolf. Zopiclone won.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Science fair experiment still going strong I see James? Many Guinea pigs carrying out your work. Nice to see that you found so manny lemmings.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You should write a story about that on the Hisec Militia blog that nobody reads.

      Delete
    2. HSM is not a blog site, it's a virus site! I got cooties from there last week!
      Or was it cooter?
      Either way there's a lot of both over there.
      XD

      Delete
    3. Nitetime is a good little lemming. Very obedient.

      Delete
  3. Inb4 antigankers cry anonymously on the blog while generating traffic!

    Thankyou in advance for generating the views XD XD xddddd

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi my name is wolf soprano. I am an addict. I have a problem with shitposting on this forum everyday because this forum is all I have left. I have been banned from all other forums due to my weak and cruel personality. Please help. I just can't stop shitposting daily. I think I am winning even though I am actually not playing any games because of being a shitposter through and through. Please help me. I am a lost little child and have a need to lash out at society because I am a little person inside. Please help me.

      Delete
    2. Thats some fine tears there 247. We are sure you really feel that way about Loyal, and it makes us lol even more.

      You poor sad bastard, you must be physically unable to stop yourself from responding. That means CODE Wins!

      Always!

      Delete
    3. Based on the time stamp wolf anon tears. Right on cue. Thank Wolf you don't disappoint. Code wins? Wolfies mental state is slipping. You call that victory? Guess you are winning then.

      Delete
  4. Four more years!
    Four more years!
    Four more years!

    ReplyDelete
  5. What's missing from AG?
    Just the F.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is it 'fun'? Fun is missing from ag.

      Or maybe 'friendly'

      Well it can't be 'fail', that's not missing from ag.

      XD

      Delete
  6. Four more zopiclones!
    Four more zopiclones!
    Four more zopiclones! Overdose!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hear one of the zopi side effects is anal leakage. This would explain a lot about hisec miners.

      Delete
    2. That's gross even for wolf to respond like that. But that's all he has left after being banned. Shitposting daily.

      Delete
    3. Hahaha exactly anon 417. Loyal anon is a shit talking miner. Zkill doesn't lie. Thanks for connecting the two for us. Shit = miner = loyal anon/ wolf soprano/ davey/ BM and whoever else he posts as. Fucking turd for brains. Winning shitposing.

      Delete
    4. Man thats a lot of butthurt salt, fags ;)

      Delete
  7. Code is just a bunch of money hungry miners in disguise.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. https://zkillboard.com/kill/47464328/

      https://zkillboard.com/kill/46905831/

      Butt hurt miner is actually loyal anon/Wolf soprano/davey/Anons very sad to find out that he's been shitposting himself. Miner loyalanon gets mad like a nub and loses his mind joins code and starts ganking people for revenge. Sad little guy really feel bad for him. Keep trying to stay relevant after being banned for losing your shit in local chat for 8 hours. Sanity does not reside in your little mind.

      Delete
    2. Haha all that shit talk about miners. Anon 417 wrote "I hear one of the zopi side effects is anal leakage. This would explain a lot about hisec miners." Would explain a lot about wolf soprano talking from his ass since he is really a miner. Who the fuck mines in a hulk. Moron.

      Delete
    3. Thanks for the tears, you fags never disappoint!

      Delete
    4. Lol even that fake loyal zkillboard is better than these miner fags kb.
      Nice fail hisec sperglords

      Delete
    5. Not fake. That's wolfs main before loyalanon. The only character he managed to save from a ban so far. I like the "once a miner always a shit" connection. Hold onto that character it's all you got! Oh and the delicious shitposting on these boards daily. Seems you have that too.

      Delete
  8. Loyal anon a miner. Shit for brains. Nice blinged out hulk bud.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nice fall into the troll trap, dumbass ;)

      Delete
    2. Nice hulk kill. A loss is a loss. But that one is pretty. Only idiots fly hulks. Ergo he's an idiot. Code logic.

      Delete
  9. But where oh where is Ming?

    ReplyDelete

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