Friday, July 15, 2016

Anti-Gankers Explain the Code, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Sam Calaticcrowd made his way into the Anti-Ganking channel for the first time, braving its toxic atmosphere in order to learn about this "CODE" thing everyone in EVE is always talking about.


The Anti-Gankers revealed an intense dislike of the Code--and an equally profound ignorance of it.


Sam was suspected of being a spy. However, there was no evidence either way, so the Anti-Gankers allowed him remain. Litigating the matter would've been a hassle. It was easier to quietly resent him instead.


Tailsko repeated his horror story about being harassed by New Order Agents in other games. The experience was so traumatic that he couldn't seem to remember anything about it, including the names of the Agents or even the name of the game.


So far, Sam felt uninformed. He had good instincts.


Another Anti-Ganker, Sodium Oxide, entered the mix. His reason for hating the New Order was simple: They gank miners and freighters. Faced with such a phenomenon, what reasonable person wouldn't devote his life to failing to stop ganks?


Sodium Oxide was the heavyweight of the group, a serious Anti-Ganker with an impressive résumé: He'd once leeched on the killmail of an Agent's Catalyst as it was being killed by CONCORD. Also, he once killed a Kestrel apparently unrelated to the New Order. In short, Sodium Oxide didn't just talk the talk, he walked the walk.


Sam wasn't sure yet if he shared the Anti-Gankers' hatred of the Code.


The more the Anti-Gankers talked about the CODE. alliance, the more it seemed to capture Sam's imagination. The Anti-Gankers aren't known for winning hearts and minds.


ShaliWhacker accused our Agents of not honouring their permits. He couldn't remember the names of any Agents who'd ganked permitholders, but they were likely the same Agents who harassed Tailsko in another game. This all took place in the aftermath of a 100 billion isk heist that cleaned out the New Order Treasury.

Then came the linking of memes.


Actually, since that 100 billion isk theft, our Treasury has only 150.9 trillion remaining.


Anti-Gankers are the New Order's secret weapon. They convert even more people to our way of thinking than most Agents do.


After Sam left, the Anti-Gankers resumed their idle gossip. The rant indeed sounds interesting, but unfortunately you won't find it anywhere. The last remaining copy was deleted by one of our directors.

21 comments:

  1. Might have been 40-50 billion isk James but do tell us more.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Prozac and Ritalin for loyalanon daily.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why would I need Prozac when I can just watch the AG channel for a few minutes to get a good laugh?

      Delete
    2. Because they are laughing at you and you are too stupid to realize it?

      BM.

      Delete
    3. So just Ritalin then? Mmmmk. Daily dosage and you'll be a better you.

      Delete
  3. Lol hisec ag carebears are utterly useless

    ReplyDelete
  4. oh man that AG conspiracy theory about the great 315. so good.

    Get your tinfoil hats everyone

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. this comment has earned a Supreme Protector's Tip of the Tinfoil-Hat™

      Delete
  5. Heres some more laughs gents - https://forums.eveonline.com/default.aspx?g=search&search=drysonbennington

    AG's brightest

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Go play some Pokemon Go in traffic Wolfe :) catch the cars if you can. Since you are banned and all.

      Delete
  6. But where oh where is Ming?

    ReplyDelete
  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You know Wolf? I think that this is the most that you have posted in awhile. It's good to see you let your psychopathic and sociopathic tendencies show. It is healthy to let out all that pent up rage from being ass raped by the 315 tentacle monster.

    BM.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't forget the Ritalin too loyalanon. Ritalin is easy! Daily winning bud. We are all rooting for you. Well not really, but the Ritalin should help.

      Delete
  9. "In short, Sodium Oxide didn't just talk the talk, he walked the walk."

    Comedy gold right there. The Code always wins!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Nothing like quality tears in the morning.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Lol these were exceptionally funny episodes.

    Who doesn't love reading the nonsense in the AG channel while giving them all 315,315 ISK bounties? Lolololol

    The stuff AGers don't know never ceases to amaze me.


    -Galaxy Pig

    ReplyDelete
  12. I wonder if there more of these wild theories on the hisec militia blog that nobody reads?

    ReplyDelete
  13. It's not true. I have a copy of the rant available for 100B, message me in game for a copy! (permit holders only)

    ReplyDelete
  14. CODE kills miners, ag kills minors.

    CODE always wins! Always!

    ReplyDelete

Note: If you are unable to post a comment, try enabling the "allow third-party cookies" option on your browser.