Thursday, November 30, 2017

Where You Send the Money, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Alyssa Yazria purchased a mining permit from Agent Aaaarrgg after he killed her Retriever. However, Alyssa didn't seem interested in forming a friendship with Aaaarrgg or in absorbing the Code on a deep level; she only wanted to know where to send her money. Before long, Alyssa lost another Retriever, this time to members of the Wreckonomics corporation.

Alyssa was annoyed by the gank--so much so that she mistakenly referred to herself as being "podded", though actually she only lost her mining vessel. However, the miner took comfort in the power of her permit.

The spokesman of the ganker squad, Razakien Okel, clearly knew more about the Code than Alyssa did. The miner complained that she'd only gone out for a "quick smoke". Carebears, if you're really going to be so quick, why don't you dock up for the duration of the smoke? By your own admission, you'll only lose a small amount of mining time.

Rather than apologizing, Alyssa doubled-down on her grievance. She cursed the gankers for playing EVE the way it's meant to be played.

When Alyssa was ganked by Aaaarrgg, she complained about the stress of having her mother in the ICU. Now she had a whole new batch of personal problems that supposedly justified violating the Code that she'd agreed to obey.

Razakien offered to help the miner, but she was too busy confessing her heretical opinions about the Code.

Highsec miners are known for their extraordinary hypocrisy: They look down on people for ganking miners because it lacks skill/risk, yet they purposefully engage in the least skillful/risky activity in EVE. Alyssa's own response to this suggests a retort that could be used by our Agents: "My main is an elite nullsec PvP'er. I only use this character to relax and chill by ganking carebears in highsec."

Of course, Alyssa's reaction to being ganked proved that she did not, in fact, have some heroic nullsec main. If she hated being ganked in highsec, she could spend more time on her nullsec character, instead of threatening to quit EVE entirely.

The miner sent a complaint letter to Aaaarrgg, the Agent who'd sold her the mining permit. She then realized a potential problem: Did the Wreckonomics corporation have anything to do with the Code? Unlike Aaaarrgg, they're not a member of the mighty CODE. alliance.

In fact, virtually all suicide ganking in highsec is performed by Agents of the New Order. You might run into a few who gankers aren't affiliated with us in some way, but basically anyone who ganks believes wholeheartedly in the Code. We're ridiculously relevant.

Alyssa didn't wait for a response from Aaaarrgg. She went right back into the asteroid belts and, several hours later, Wreckonomics corp ganked her again. And this time, they made sure to get her pod, too.

Agent Razakien had been courteous enough to invite Alyssa to a convo, but she only accepted the invite after she was ganked. She accused our heroes of stealing her implants (if only it were possible!).

Not every miner is a quick study. Some need to be repeatedly killed before they can learn anything new. Guess which type of miner Alyssa is?

Alyssa finally admitted that she never cared about the Code. She only wanted an easy way to avoid the inconvenience of PvP and other players in a multiplayer PvP game. Without absolute safety--while AFK--Alyssa saw no purpose in continuing with EVE. I suppose her illustrious nullsec character wasn't reason enough.

With that in mind, I'd like to propose some additional content for the EVE tutorial: "Attention new players: If you can't obey the Code, GET OUT."


  1. Are autists angry this time of the morning ?
    " obey the CODE. Or explode"

    Never forget ag moderator shardani

  2. Will these vulgar miners ever learn? I wonder if CCP could perhaps add a tutorial that teaches miners about politeness? Clearly, as James 315 wrote, the NPE is in need of some serious tweaking.

  3. "With that in mind, I'd like to propose some additional content for the EVE tutorial: "Attention new players: If you can't obey the Code, GET OUT."

    So Jamey now admits that he and his CHODE. slaves are indeed hurting Eve's retention numbers, aka griefing. What a hypocrite he is.

    1. Actually, he's only 'hurting Eve's retention numbers' if said new players do, in fact, 'GET OUT'.

      Fortunately for CCP (and ourselves) at least some of them are staying. No, it's the cranky 10-year carebears who talk most about leaving, but then talk is mostly all they do anyway, if they're not AFK.

    2. Greifing and no honour are the catchcry of ineptitude and often spruked by those who exploded.

  4. Alyssa Yazria has some real gaul to be on that high horse. Like wut.

  5. It's trash like OP that has dropped Eve membership to the point of begging for players and giving it away for free. Eve had the draw of PVP if you want, that's the definition of high sec.

    1. Excuse me, but NO NO NO NO NO NO NO x100 NO

      For all you guys that are new both here and ingame let me bestow some useful education about eve.

      1. High Sec = Safer, Not totally safe. Concord is there to punish not protect. Attacks can happen anywhere regardless of security status and whether or not you want to be attacked.

      2. Get used to the idea that everytime you press undock or leave the protection of a POS shield you are consenting to PvP and risk getting blown up. This applies anywhere from a 1.0 High Sec system up to a C6 wormhole.

      3. Scamming is allowed. If its too good to be true, it usually is.

      4. Almost 100% of the time you lose a ship due to a suicide gank, a gate camp, or getting caught out solo it is your fault. It is also 100% your fault if you lose a pod in high sec or low sec. Learn from it and move on.

      5. Never AFK undocked. It is inviting you to be blown up.

      6. The auto-pilot button. Never use it. It will get you killed. This includes High Sec.

      7. Raging in local after you get killed only puts you on everyone's shitlist and accomplishes nothing.

      8. You can get killed for a number of reasons in this game. This includes Battle over resources, War between corporations, you annoyed them, they were bored, or for no reason at all.

      9. Protect yourself at all times using all the tools and mechanics available to you. Never expect someone else to protect you. They probably won't.

      10. Have Fun! This really is a fun game if you take the above advice to heart and follow those guidelines to a T.

    2. Many versions of those 10 points are pasted all over the net, good effort, but posting them again here won't keep the stupid people out.

      The only way to save EVE is to keep it so hard that the most ignorant can't get a foothold. We should punish stupidity with excessive force. I started EVE expecting a game that was directed by natural selection. Unlike evolution however, the CCP devs keep trying to protect the weak, diseased, and mentally deficient instead of culling them naturally.

      CCP should quit trying to control what comes naturally. Nature's a bitch yea, but the alternative is surely worse when EVE is flooded with afk highsec shitters who squeal all day about changing EVE to make it easier for more shitters to join.

      What's wrong with a little exclusivity?

      Stop fucking with nature CCP! Remove CONCORD and let EVE develop naturally.

    3. Yeah I know, But its there for anyone willing to listen which they probably won't anyway.

      I do have to put some blame for this on CCP though. When they try and get new players, they don't fully tell players what they are getting into.

      There is an add on some random webpage advertising a Space MMO and the first thing that a random passerby thinks is its World of Warcraft in Space and plays it according to that assumption.

      I think CCP can do a much better job in conveying what the game actually is through their tutorials.

      I would add a career path agent for the darker side of EvE that goes through a series of different scenarios as both the player being the victim and the perpetrator with various dialogs explaining the involved mechanics of both avoiding and perpetrating these acts.

      Example: Suicide ganking tutorial
      The game gives you a venture and tells you to warp to a dead space and mine an asteroid. A couple minutes later a NPC warps in and blows you up. Then a series of dialog boxes come up explaining what happened and some of the tools and mechanics available to avoid it in the future. Then another tutorial where you have to successfully suicide gank an NPC venture in the same exact scenario above with dialog boxes explaining the relevant mechanics.

    4. There was no tutorial when i started playing and compared to now ,was literally that image that is thrown around showing a cliff representing the learning curve.

      More players then too.

      Socialising and inclusivity went a long way to learning self defense.

      The most important aspect was attitude and persistence. These days people expect everything given to them and believe they are entitled.

      That is the real problem.

  6. Another example of CODE. preventing cancer.

    " whatever you do.....don't smoke "

  7. - "My main is an elite nullsec PvP'er. I only use this character to relax and chill by ganking carebears in highsec."

    Why hell yea I'm gonna start using that one every time.

    1. Good use of a character slot. Well done.

  8. Where do these miners get the idea that mining is a legitimate vocation, and that legitimacy implies the right to do it in James 315 Territory, AFK, untanked, without interference? It's no wonder these pilots claim to hate EVE. A more humane NPE would teach outright that mining in highsec is dangerous, unrewarding, and a sure recipe for burnout.

  9. The salt is real, I want the murder lover back.


Note: If you are unable to post a comment, try enabling the "allow third-party cookies" option on your browser.