Saturday, May 14, 2016

The Universal Appeal of the Code

Alliance-based killboards and other tools related to in-game mechanics make it simpler to follow what's going on in EVE. Simplification doesn't always go hand-in-hand with accuracy, however. Some things, like the Code, transcend game mechanics. Rebels and skeptics think they can avoid the influence of the New Order by setting CODE. to red or indulging in absurd fantasies of a CODE. break-up. Not so. The Code has an appeal that goes beyond corporations, alliances, factions, and coalitions.


A group of nice young Goons from the Ministry of Love came across a pair of AFK miners. This sight instantly persuaded them that the Code was right all along. They destroyed the Hulk, its pod, and Hulk's alt's Retriever.


With the zeal of the newly converted, the Goons celebrated a victory that they knew had been made possible by the Code. Gank recipient Ravirr To called them "goatfuckers"; local rebel Nova Draconus was similarly skeptical of the Code.


Ravirr was instructed to calm down, but he categorically refused.


The longer the Goons remained in the system, the more they understood the depth of highsec's needs. Those accustomed to dwelling in nullsec are often shocked by the sorry state of the bot-aspirant miner.


Highsec's problems, like those of the world, cannot be fixed in a single day. Even multiple Goons telling the miner to calm down didn't do the trick. Nova Draconus was disgusted by the sight of Goons enforcing the Code.


Nova and Ravirr discussed the threat posed by highsec ganking. They seemed ready to appeal for help from CCP, but it would've been easier for them to send a petition to me--with 10 million isk enclosed, of course.


Maximus Decimus Urelius's Retriever was destroyed by another group of Code enthusiasts from outside CODE. Hailing from The-Culture and Templis CALSF, the gankers encouraged Maximus to buy a permit. He, too, absolutely refused.


In addition to requesting 10 million isk, the gankers informed Maximus of his need to obey other provisions of the Code, such as offering the traditional "gf" or another sign of respect. Again, Maximus couldn't see the wisdom in it.


Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Even though talking to Maximus must have seemed like talking to a brick wall, he was actually getting closer to compliance with each EVEmail.


From "FUCK YOUR CODE. dont contact me again" to "i would like to request a mineing permit please" in less than an hour. Just imagine the opportunities Maximus would've missed, had the gankers taken him at his word and stopped pressing the issue. This is why the New Order--inside and outside of CODE.--will never give up on the Code. Highsec is worth fighting for.

33 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. CONGRATULATIONS!!

      Dear Wolf Soprano:

      We're pleased to inform you that your recent post to MB has been selected by the Miner Bumping (MB) Quality Control Committee, as a candidate for the Clueless User of the Month (CUM) award. Our patented analysis software, the Junk Interception Software Module (JISM v4.8) has rated your post on the following criteria thusly:

      AWARENESS OF GROUP STANDARDS: -4000

      STRENGTH OF CONCEPT: -3000

      IMPLEMENTATION OF CONCEPT: -5500

      OVERALL PRESENTATION: -1750

      ENTERTAINMENT VALUE: 0

      TASTELESSNESS: 0

      TOTAL SCORE: -14250

      BONUS: -1000*

      ADJUSTED TOTAL SCORE: -15250

      *Note - your post has surpassed the previously held record of minus 13,050 points, which qualifies you for a bonus award of -1000 points. Congratulations on your achievement! You have attained an honor rarely bestowed upon posters, old and new, to this group. Your dribblings in MB will stand as an example for future generations of clueless, mewling, newbies. They will gaze in awe at your decapitated, mummified head jammed atop a pike at the gate to our little corner of Hell, and be reminded to read our FAQ and lurk until they get the hang of what passes for culture here.

      As a candidate for the CUM award, you will will receive all the abuse the MB community can heap upon you for the remainder of your earthly life. You will enjoy having your every post taunted and mocked by some of the blog's finest, and most twisted minds. You and your wretched companions will huddle in fear, awaiting the next assault upon your security, your integrity, your very being. You will also receive the hatred and derision of your newfound "best enemies" at absolutely no cost to you.

      Should your post receive the prestigious CUM award, you will be whisked away to our magnificent desert resort, Calabozo De Pistas, in colorful Baja California for 5 wonderful days and 4 glorious nights. Once there you will be treated to every method of clue insertion known by our most experienced clue technicians, anal, oral, genital, nasal, ocular, aural, axial, you name it, they'll do it. They will treat you ruthlessly, as they cater to their own every whim. And you won't have to lift a finger, in fact you won't be able to lift a finger if they're doing their jobs correctly.

      Your daily schedule will include being pummeled in every orifice round the clock with various large, pointed and spiked clue devices. Our technicians ensure you'll receive maximum pain with minimum loss of blood so that you'll be ready for the final night of your stay.

      That night, your last night, holds the special enchantment of a "Celabracion de la Squick", at which you will be the guest of honor. You will experience a night you'll never forget, or remember, for that matter. The highlight of the evening comes during those final few moments of consciousness when you will feel the gentle slap of our clue technician's nutsack against your nose as he drives the final clue home - "Post Quality, Discourage Crap."

      Delete
    2. Wow. A disgusting story for all the grandkids.

      Delete
    3. You should, it was about you, and it was freaking hilarious.

      -Oink

      Delete
    4. Yeah, Wolf doesn't "do" reading. Plenty of CODE. breakers to WoW.

      ~ Asia Leigh

      Delete
    5. Speak like Yoda Wolf does sometimes. Then again, he used to be our master with the force. After the ban, he has become more powerful than we can ever imagine!!


      -Galaxy Pig

      Delete
    6. You should try and read it Snigie, it's a good article.

      ~ Asia Leigh

      Delete
    7. Lol that butthurt miner must really live up to his name, what a wall of text that no one is going to read.

      All Wolf has to do to collect tears is post a simple factiod in these comments, and the splerg will fly!

      CODE wins again.

      the character may have retired but his vision is unstoppable.

      Dead or compliant, carebears will be governed by the CODE!

      Delete
    8. Simple is what simple does :D

      ~ Asia Leigh

      Delete
    9. For example, take a look at anon 142, he tries to come up with something witty, but failed miserably. I didn't even laugh. Simple minds indeed. Then we have Wolf and Snigie who are too lazy to read some text. If they are lazy here, what does that say about them in real life?

      Delete
    10. @359
      Comprehension much?
      Get a permit or get rekt

      Delete
    11. 413 I will not get a permit so bend over so I can fuck you in the ass.

      Delete
  2. This blog-post is chock-full of wisdom.

    Even though the mighty CODE. Alliance daily - hourly - brings to the citizens of Highsec its laser-focussed benevolence, sometimes too little regard is paid to the many supporters who toil away in far-flung belts and systems, who shun the limelight, yea even of the Saviour's Blog, to bring the sweet justice of his Code to those who might fail and fall without it.

    What a blessing is our beloved Code.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. fuck your code

      Delete
    2. Succinct, Anon, but curiously lacking in impact.

      Delete
  3. Don't the goons have a war to lose?

    ReplyDelete
  4. When the goons go, the code codes too. Looks like the AG movement is building up steam, and it smells better than what comes out of your ass.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The one that comes out of your ass can EvE better than all ag combined, and if you really think ag will ever win, it is smarter too.

      Delete
  5. Yet another glorious victory for the mighty CODE. Alliance!

    I don't understand why the miner did not calm down, despite receiving repeated commands to do so?

    Praise James! \0/

    ReplyDelete
  6. another failure from anti-ganking.

    they sure do love failing non-stop daily continuously ALL the time!!!!1

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This from a guy who takes pleasure in an AG mod committing suicide and murdering his young son...sick

      Delete
    2. Yepps, murdering his young son was sick.

      Dead ag? Welp that's one less shitheel around ruining EvE and RL for everyone, and lets face it, his spawn had his genetics so it would have been just as useless in game and IRL. AND he was a mod for ag? Goddamn that explains a lot!

      So what's the problem beers?
      You didnt know the asshole or his kid, but that dont stop you from using them too.
      Hypocrite

      And whats not to take pleasure in? One less useless retard and his defective offspring on a planet of nearly 7 BILLION people.

      So what did we lose? How many people do you think this planet can support, Beers? You need to learn some resource management friend, because unlike EvE, we are all stuck on this one rock.
      Retards and their defective genetics are not needed, they will just bring down the rest of us.

      He probably did the rest of us a favor. Any of the rest of you ag defectives wanna join him?
      Become AN HERO today! Help save the world!

      Delete
  7. This is a story for all the newCUMmers :D

    ReplyDelete
  8. Also a story for the children and grandchildren!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Also a parable for the miners!
    Get a permit or get rekt!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hey ag! I got some steam coming for youz! I hear you likes it!

    ReplyDelete
  11. The Miner: http://oi58.tinypic.com/2usirsl.jpg

    ReplyDelete
  12. A group of nice young Goons from the Ministry of Love

    ReplyDelete
  13. If goons actually spent more time fighting the war in nullsec instead of fucking about ganking miners, then maybe they would be winning, or at least prolonging the war.

    ReplyDelete

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