Monday, June 27, 2016

The Wise Man in Local, Part 1

CCP has admitted that the best content in EVE is the content made by the players themselves. And nobody makes better content than the New Order of Highsec.
EVE System > Channel changed to Local : Bahromab
Aaaarrgg > gf
Alastra Starlaa > Aaaarrgg according to code you are obliged to challenge a miner with a message before ganking
Aaaarrgg > read again
Aaaarrgg > everyone should be aware of the Code by now
Content arrived in the Bahromab system when Agent Aaaarrgg engaged in elite PvP with an enemy Retriever piloted by Sir Darkan. The miner was vanquished. In an instant, the system came to life.
Alastra Starlaa > also your whole ethos is about punishing afk play not ganking people for giggles,
Aaaarrgg > well i entered local, he didnt dock
Aaaarrgg > no wave
Aaaarrgg > totally afk, pod sat there for ages
Alastra Starlaa > code has fallen a long way from what it was supposed to be because of pilots like you that hide behind it
Once upon a time, it was fashionable for miners to deny the existence of the Code. Then the space lawyers came along and declared that although the Code existed, it was a violation of the EULA. Now the space lawyers argue with Agents on the Code's terms.
Baron Ayol > sad
Baron Ayol > pathetic
Aaaarrgg > oh boy the miners are revolting today :)
Alastra Starlaa > i'm not a miner i'm just doing a mission
Alastra Starlaa > i'm a newbro looking to get into real pvp
Aaaarrgg > well shoot someone
The self-proclaimed "newbro", whose character as indeed only a few days old, lamented the fact that Agents do not follow the Code. Alastra also claimed that the New Order isn't as principled as it used to be. When this line of argument first appeared, I asked where all of those nostalgic supporters were during the early days of the Code. Now we know--they weren't playing EVE yet.
Aaaarrgg > but id suggest you actually read minerbumping and see what James315 actually says
Alastra Starlaa > yeah i read it
Alastra Starlaa > and it contradicts itself
Aaaarrgg > in that case if i were you i would mail James with your critique of the Code
Alastra Starlaa > i did he is never online
Another complaint I see these days: Rebels and skeptics are disappointed that I'm never online. But thanks to the watchlist nerf--which predates Alastra--how could they know when I'm online? Regardless, you can always find me in highsec. Wherever my Agents are doing my work, there I am also.
Aaaarrgg > talking about contradictions
Aaaarrgg > you are a newbro
Aaaarrgg > and talking about the code like you know it for a while :)
Aaaarrgg > which is it
Alastra Starlaa > everyone knows about the code its one of the first things people warn eachother about
And with that single comment, Alastra Starlaa condemned countless newbies who claim ignorance as an excuse for disobeying the Code. At the same time, Alastra dealt a mortal blow to the rebels and skeptics who deny the New Order's relevance. New players who haven't yet learned of the existence of The Mittani or Pandemic Legion are studying the Code. We are the biggest thing in EVE right now. To think that people say EVE is dying--it sounds like the game is thriving!
Alastra Starlaa > but also some people read about games before they get into them or watch youtube channels
Alastra Starlaa > i got into eve by watching wingspanTT
Aaaarrgg > so everybody knows about the Code :)
Aaaarrgg > \o/
Aaaarrgg > AG usually claim Code are irrelevant, now you change your tack
Aaaarrgg took a moment to bask in the glory of the Code's victory. Our Agents win victories even during their aggression timers.
Alastra Starlaa > but noone believes you are doing it for the good of the game
Aaaarrgg > we believe we do :)
Alastra Starlaa > code is irrelevant in one respect, people will suicide gank wether they try to justify it with the "code" is irrelevant
Alastra Starlaa > all the code means is gankers are less honest
As long as we're busting myths, how about another one? People say that ganking would continue even if the Code didn't exist. Actually, CCP's own report at the end of 2012 stated that following their nerfs to ganking, miner ganking was at an all-time low (see toward the bottom of page 104). Then the New Order created its army of Knights. Today, we're the first thing every player learns about. We single-handedly resurrected the practice of miner ganking. Another reason to thank your New Order content creators.
Aaaarrgg > well since you are a newbro, you dont remember eve 4 years ago
Aaaarrgg > every belt in highsec strip mined completely within a few hours of DT by flocks of bot miners in cargo fit hulks
Aaaarrgg > that doesnt happen anymore, the belts are full \o/
Sparkle Sauce > i remember eve 4 years ago
Sparkle Sauce > yeah thats an exageration
Aaaarrgg > not really
Sparkle Sauce > it was never as bad as that
Because of the presence of a single New Order Agent, Bahromab local evolved. Its silence, having been broken, gave way to a fruitful conversation. Naturally, our Agent was at the center of it all, enthroned by the carebears' attention.
Aaaarrgg > go back on the forums
Aaaarrgg > and read all the threads on the lack of ore
Sparkle Sauce > i've read the threads but i was playing then and i never had any problem finding ore
Sparkle Sauce > so the threads exagerat, it was just a few people bitching about their systems and assuming it was the state of the game
Alastra Starlaa > i dont know why you cant just admit you do it because you like being destructive, there is no shame in it
Aaaarrgg > why would i when Highsec still needs saved from the bots getting a toehold again
Our hero made the best possible use of his 15-minute timer. He taught the miners about EVE history and the Code. Even those who disagreed with the Code found a reason to remain at their keyboards.
Aaaarrgg > well those few folk made threads everyday for a couple of years
Sparkle Sauce > yeah but there is a certain kind of person who makes bitchty threads on forums if you follow me
Alastra Starlaa > you arent targeting bots
Alastra Starlaa > you are targeting soft targets for fun
Alastra Starlaa > otherwise you wouldnt have attempted to scramble me
Aaaarrgg > when was that
Then Alastra made a solemn accusation against our Agent. She charged Aaaarrgg with attempted ganking.
Alastra Starlaa > thats why i even bothered calling you on your bullshit normally i just ignore code pilots when i see them ganking they arent relevant to my playstyle
Alastra Starlaa > you did it a moment ago on the belt
Aaaarrgg > the retriever ?
Alastra Starlaa > no you tried to scramble my little mining frigate
Believing her own ship was under attack during the Retriever gank, Alastra had fled from the asteroid belt in her Venture. Wait a minute--didn't Alastra say earlier that she wasn't a miner? Typical. I wish I had 10 million isk for every time I heard that one.
Aaaarrgg > nope
Aaaarrgg > dont even have them on overview
Alastra Starlaa > i got a white message on my screen saying scramble attempt failed
Alastra Starlaa > so dont even try it
Aaaarrgg > post it in local
Alastra Starlaa > i didn't screen shot it
Alastra Starlaa > those little white messages are there and gone
Alastra Starlaa > and of course you are denying it because it was against code
Next, the miner accused Aaaarrgg of lying. She believed he was trying to cover up his warp scramble attempt. Aaaarrgg scrolled through his log.

Our hero was telling the truth. Only the Retriever had been scrambled. Alastra's Venture was never attacked at all. Aaaarrgg posted a screenshot of the log and made it available to everyone in Bahromab local. Faced with this undeniable evidence, would the "newbro" admit she was wrong?

To be continued...


  1. Preheat the barbecue so it’s hot, or until the coals turn white.
    Rinse the fish under cold water and pat dry with kitchen paper.
    Twist the stalks off from the bunch of coriander and place in a pestle and mortar, keeping the leaves for the garnish. Remove the tough outer leaves from the lemongrass, trim and add to the mortar.
    Peel, slice and add the garlic and ginger, then slice and add the chilli (if using). Add the lime leaves, then bash them a bit to release the flavours.
    For each trout, take a large double sheet of newspaper and line with greaseproof paper.
    Slice 3 limes, then place a line of the slices in the middle of each newspaper. Lay the fish on top and stuff the cavity with half the herby mixture, season with sea salt and drizzle with oil. Top with more lime slices and drizzle with more oil and salt.
    Wrap up the newspaper and tie with string. Dunk both parcels in a bucket of water and leave to soak for no more than 5 minutes.
    Barbecue the fish parcels, uncovered, for 30 minutes or until the flesh is firm. The newspaper will be black, but don’t worry – the important thing is that the fish will be cooked to perfection.
    Remove the fish from the paper, drizzle with any juices, top with coriander leaves and serve with lime wedges.

  2. Code is a bunch of autistic shitters. Don't even bother engaging in a normal conversation with them. This message brought to by the story for the grandkids foundation.

    1. This is a lesson for the grandchildren for sure.

    2. Loyalanon approves this message

    3. Continue to post impotent anonymous tears, you are the shitters. Lowlife carebear scum, soon to be eradicated from EvE. ;)

  3. I like where this story is going! I'm also getting hungry, recipe anon, you nefarious bastard...

    Any way we can get you to post 'to be continued...' recipes when we have 'to be continued...' minerbumping episodes?

    -Galaxy Pig

    1. Place the carrot, onion, leek, celery, and pork knuckles into a large stockpot. Throw in the peppercorns, and season with salt to taste. Add enough water to the pot to cover the vegetables. Cover, and cook over medium heat for 2 to 3 hours, or until everything is tender. Remove the knuckles from the water, and drain. Reserve vegetables and cooking liquid.
      Preheat the oven to 425 degrees F ( 220 degrees C). Melt the shortening in an enamel coated cast iron baking dish or pan.


    2. Note from the kitchen:
      hard to do 'to be continued...' recipies as it is often unclear how many episodes to follow.
      Currently we are considering multi-course menues for our valued customers.

  4. Replies
    1. Killing carebears in the name of the savior helps too :)

  5. EvE players from all zones need to band together to fight the hisec carebear bot cancer that's killing EvE.

    We must drop everything else and slaughter the hisec carebear trash. Everyone should petition CCP to remove hisec mining and pve from our game.

    If you care about EvE you must kill hisec minerbots, it's our only hope for a better EvE.

    Imagine an EvE where there are no hisec miners to threaten RL death and destruction, an EvE where your entire family could PvP without the threat of some shitheel miner pedo talking to your children, or threatening to rape your wife. The EvE we all deserve.

    Every day we allow hisec carebear trash to play, EvE becomes more like WoW.

    1. Wow. Code reminds me of real life biggots in Britain telling anyone that looks remotely different to fuck off and leave. Well done to paint your image. Evexit.

    2. Oh well, looks like Zopiclone is just a hisec miner after all, cannot seperate the game from RL.

      What? No hitler/nazi refrences there zopibear?

      Maybe you would like France, i hear it smells like body odor and fear this time of year, now that everyone is welcome.

    3. Hi Zopiclone, I'm disappointed in the uncharacteristically caustic tone of your remarks.

      Are you British? I am, and I can say quite without malice that it was a mistake to hold the referendum, a bigger mistake to make it an 'In-Out' choice, for it polarised a population seething with discontent over a number of issues.

      The fallout, including the disgraceful reactions you mention, has been disastrous.

      Why not sympathise with the awful situation in which we find ourselves, and reach out to those of us Brits who don't fit the description you gave, above?

    4. @126
      Butthurt much fag?
      Zopi is playing YOU, carebear. We see him for what he is.

      Thanks for you autistic tears, greasy carebear. CODE wins every time you post ignorant crap.

    5. @Rob
      Zopibear is showing his true colors, why does this suprise anyone?

    6. Wow what a spectrum of responses. Year Rob the Brexit is definitely a humpty dumpty moment. Never should of gotten this far. To the Salty Anons: LOL. ;)

    7. The amount of Code tears from one Zopiclone post is staggering. He/she seems to have really burned you baddies. Cool to see someone actually making Code kids cry a bit. Good to see a balance in the universe.

    8. Hahahahaha looks like he did. He stole your sanity @413. The fact that you called him zopifag, zopigirl, zopibear just shows how butt hurt he caused you personally. Your CODE Anon tears are more delicious than ever. The fact that CODE hides behind Anons is so funny. Brilliant that he inflicted tears to griefers. Brilliant!

    9. Obligatory hahahahaha. Hahahahahahaha. Brilliant! Name calling is sure making it seem like you are winning. Hahahahahaha

  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

  7. Zopiclone belongs to a class of medicines commonly called Z drugs. It works by acting on the way messages are sent in your brain, which help you to sleep. It reduces the time it takes for you to fall asleep and increases the length of time you spend sleeping.

    Zopiclone will often work well in the short term, but it is not normally prescribed for more than two to four weeks. This is because your body gets used to it within a short period of time and after this it is unlikely to have the same effect. Your body may also become dependent on it when it is taken for longer periods of time than this.

  8. Zopiclone is your friend! Kindest nicest ganker I ever met. Not like those other code shitters.

    1. If by kindest you mean 'lying crybear that fooled all the miners with his excuses after he left CODE' then yes, yes he is.
      One thing the crybears didnt see was zopibear behind the scenes making fun of crybears and plotting ways to extract tears from the sobbing bitches like anon 152.
      Now these same crybears worship zopi as if he were the king of carebears, which i guess he is.
      All hail zopibear! The best liar in ag.

    2. Brilliant! The Code on salt.

    3. Only cry bears we see is CODE Anons spitting anger. What a nice change.

    4. 433 please point out the CODE tears, i dont think you really understand what that means, but you keep trying hard friend.

    5. wow loving these tears. zopi post more so I can read all the replies XD

  9. I loled at all the hisec miner carebear tears, they really do get mad when you point out how bad Zopiclone lied to them.

    Wait till they find out Loyal is still playing on his main and Zopi is just ganking on a new character.

    It's hard to believe any 'adults' are that easily fooled, or that quick to sperg retarded shit.

    Looks like CODE wins again! Always! :D

    1. Shhhh remember that the fact that loyalanon is still playing is supposed to a secret. Shhhh don't tell anyone that loyal anon is his new/old character. He might get banned again. Don't spoil it for him. EvE is all he has left in life.

    2. Zopiclone still ganks. Yeah old news bro. He just doesn't do it in the name of your Jesus. He's also the nicest ganker ever. Just the nicest person you will ever meet. Sweetheart really.

    3. 453, how can anyone be a 'nice' ganker? AG says all hisec gankers are RL criminals.

      I say he is just like all the rest of the hisec gankers. And so does you leaders in AG.

      Your contradictions are not surprising, you are a crybear after all.

    4. Just a sweetheart. AG approves this message. All is relative. An enemy of my enemy is my friend.

    5. It's not just about ganking. Just cause people are playing a game on two different sides, it's about respect. Zopi is the best clone I've met! Aaaarrgg is also quite nice actually. Sorry I won't tell anyone else. :)

    6. Meant to also say... There are others out there that have respect. But, there are also many that don't.

    7. Hey kip does kalynn shardani have your respect?

    8. Hey... It's one of the 'many'... How is shuffleboard going? Things going good at the old 'retirement' home... I hear the food there taste like shit. Or it is actual shit... I don't know. Welp, good luck with that.

  10. See, this is why i advocate the removal of hisec pve from EvE. All it does is encourage carebears to continue to believe they deserve some sort of special treatment.

    Well they do, they deserve to be ganked until they move to low/null or quit. They are just to toxic to leave unattended in hisec.

    AND, they probably should not be allowed to post here without adult supervision. For everyone's sake.

  11. All hail zopiliar! King of the hisec pedophiles!
    Hisec miners, you deserve him :)
    We will not stand in the way of your love!

    1. BM why are switching sides? The Code doesn't always win. Don't let them get to you too. Oh no the code is a monster that has taken BM from us!

  12. Thats got to be the same crybear posting all that zopiluv. One poor delusional hisec miner carebear. Blinded by his hatred of gankers because of his own daily fail, he will latch onto anything his frail mind thinks makes his argument valid.

    I bet he tears like a river when he gets ganked in game.

    1. Must be. Clearly all the posts are all ONE person including your own. A schitzo perhaps? Maybe someone trolling you from within. Maybe even your own leader? Fuck it if we will ever know and find out.

  13. Best comment section in a while. Came here for a story and left with Code tears too. 10/10 Would read again.

    1. Comments are better than today's story.

  14. This site should be renamed.

    I propose a couple options"

    Miners Whining
    Miner Trolling

    1. Miner whoring
      Miner salt collecting
      Code self admiration society
      Code circle jerk

      All appropriate to uplift the fragile minds of code.

  15. These comments really get out of control, with the emotions. I treasure each one though, and I believe James 315 does too, because no matter how hard to read they are, people taking the time to shitpost means that the Code is still relevant. In fact, if shitposting is a valid indicator, The Code is more relevant than ever before!

  16. The,uhh... "flow" of this comments section makes me really think this is just the usual codedot shilling. You know, where codedot members log in as Anon to sperginate under the guise of being a victimized miner, throwing threats and "tears", then logging back into thier ganker account to rile up the "miner anon".

    The telltales are the writing styles being so similar between "I hate codefags!" and the opposing "I hate minerfags!".

    1. So CODE is trying to stay self relevant. Cool detective work.


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