Tuesday, November 29, 2016

Calming the Miners of Osmon, Part 3

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent Liek DarZ brought the Code to the miners of Osmon. He soon learned that they were in desperate need of his calming influence.


Agent Liek observed that the miners had peculiar ideas about PvP. Namely, they were against it. This is a strange attitude to have. It would be like signing up to play EVE Online even though you hate spaceships. But it was worse than that--the miners lacked civility.


To the carebears of Osmon, ganking someone is as impolite as sending them a real-life death threat. No wonder they petition ganks.


Our Agent was confident that he could bring the miners to their senses, if only they would calm down.


As a trained Agent of the New Order, Liek knew to instruct the miners to calm down. The tricky part is, when miners aren't calm, they don't follow instructions very well.


Seeing the Osmon mining community in such a sorry state, Liek DarZ relied entirely upon his faith in the Code.


The Code guarantees ultimate victory in highsec. Every Agent knows that no matter how much opposition they face, they will be rewarded if only they continue to press onward.


Agent Liek encountered Hannah Galvinov illegally mining in a fail-fit Retriever. He stopped her criminal enterprise dead in its tracks. But could he start her rehabilitation?


Hannah didn't seem like a prime candidate for a mining permit. She denied the legitimacy of the New Order.


Hannah also lacked a basic knowledge of the Code. How can one follow a Code if one doesn't know it? Our Agent stepped in to help her, effectively acting as Hannah's private tutor.


A breakthrough: Hannah began to calm down. And once she started calming down, her desire to become calm only grew.


...And calm miners buy permits.


Agent Liek DarZ experienced the victory of the Code in Osmon. Miners saw wisdom in compliance.


It doesn't hurt that Liek is a likeable fellow--a quality possessed by all our Agents. You know what's interesting? When miners buy permits and obey the Code, they start to become likeable, too.

14 comments:

  1. Liek truly is a class act and a damn good ganker, I knew this story would have a happy ending!


    AG, you now have permission to fill the comments with fresh tears for Wolf.


    -Oink

    ReplyDelete
  2. Savior, you should add "Calming down" as one of the blog labels!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Replies
    1. The CODE is dead long live goons

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    2. Hey what's up guys it's scarce here and we have a double upload for today because we have some fucking HUGE stories to talk about. Now our first topic comes from Faze Rain where he tweets: "Just found out a deep dark secret from my girlfriend" and everyone gets worried and then he tweets: "She puts milk before she puts in cereal." like this is fucking crazy i did not expect his girlfriend to do this shit but imma try to stay neutral although im more biased towards rain in this situation. Next topic we have for today is from leafyishere now apparently one of his haters made a video accusing leafyishere of sexually harassing him, like if this is true this is gonna be fucking HUGE. But later leafy tweeted out saying: "i didnt do that" so he didnt do it. and that's it for the video today i hope you enjoyed and if you did please leave a thumbs up and i'll see you later peace.

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  4. Miners like that are exactly whats wrong with a society that gives medals for participation... CODE. won, they lost.

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  5. Great job Agent DarZ! An Agent's secondary role is to set a good example for the miners of highsec, and yours is exemplary.

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  6. Zopiclone is ganking more than loyalanon. Too fucking funny. Feels bad man

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So you don't know about the new Wolf alts. And you think crying here will somehow make you feel better?
      Confirmed zopifag alt.

      Delete
    2. Story checks out.

      Zopiclone is ganking more than loyalanon.

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  7. But where oh where is Ming?

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  8. Im amused at anon 809 implying goonswarm hate CODE. must be a new pleb trying to be relevant

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nah, just another impotent highsec PHag. Can't EVE properly so he posts tears here, where we can all laugh at him. So Code wins again.

      Delete
  9. You guys are fun to read, but what forever fails my comprehension is why miners choose to pay a 10M permit on goodwill rather that buying a good tank for their ships and/or mining aligned? Which is what they should do anyways. But then I just mined for some months before getting to do less boring stuff and I'm not in the miner mindset.

    ReplyDelete

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