Sunday, February 26, 2017

Kills of the Week

It was a disaster of a week for the bot-aspirants and Anti-Gankers, who suffered countless humiliating defeats. The spirit of the Code, as ever, was on full display in highsec. I can't imagine why someone wouldn't buy a mining permit these days. You owe it to yourself! With that thought in mind, from the week of February 19th @ 00:00 EVEtime through February 25th @ 23:59 EVEtime...

Sally Hekki was in a really big hurry. She completely forgot to use modules of any kind on her hauling ship. Indeed, she was in such a hurry she forgot to select a proper ship to haul her 17.4 billion isk cargo. Worst of all, she forgot to buy a New Order permit. It was that last point that got her into the most trouble, because Agent Eva Mavas was on the lookout for permit-less haulers.

How do blueprint copies add up to 17.4 billion isk? When you have over a thousand of them, almost anything's possible.

It was a rough week for Star Uitra. At least, that's what I assume, because why would a happy, healthy, focused individual autopilot their 14.4 billion isk freighter through Niarja? Star was disposed of by Agents Skiff Poddington, Bint Bint, SynthiaGreey, Ricki Lake Show, Fabulous Andy, BoneyTooth Thompkins ISK-Chip, Yojiro, Gea Stormbound, Jack Fizzleblade, Turkey Baster, Git Guud Nurd, Archibald Fizzleblade, Gottfried Fizzleblade, Lawrence Lawton, Slipstream Prediouca, Ivana Freemam, Skeezy McSkeez, Industrial Regulation Supervisor, James Poddington, Schizz Popinov, Franz Fizzleblade, Hulk Poddington, Karl Friedrich Fizzleblade, Hagen Fizzleblade, Interstellar Jihad, Hermann Fizzleblade, and Laelynn Kino.

Our Agents were pleased: They got Fortizar and Orca kills for free!

If you're the type of EVE player who likes to keep his ear to the ground--or if you happened to go to Jita--then you know I've buried the lede this week. For 'twas the week of Burn Jita, which saw the destruction of scores of freighters and jump freighters worth over half a trillion isk. A strong contingent of Imperium tourists made their way to highsec, where they were supplied with free gank ships by their nullsec overlords--and steadied by the presence of elite New Order forces. Needless to say, Estellaa picked the wrong day to bring her 16.8 billion isk jump freighter (with ORE cargo expanders, no less!) to the Jita neighborhood.

Agents Hugh Mahn, Admiral Mason, Jason Kusion, Taruga Serly, hyprviper1, Morrigan Laima, Mildron Klinker, Brodog827, ishmael Asanari, Admiral Atradies, Molly Klinker, BJBee 3894, GR13Fy, Sol oizum, Daavid Cee, Hudson Kade, Scott Houlihan, TheArtistFormerlyKnownAs Chuck, Interstellar Jihad, Moratok, DisMafugga, AvidSensei, BJBee 236, Fiddly Pop, Labam Ducati, Neuntausendeins, BJBee009, Telur Curie, Sprag, BJ4Kiddos, Gaius Hadsburg, Paladium Azoun, Eugenie Brazier, BJBee 069, Count Ragnar Danneskjold, BJBee 198, Marchio Trogdor, Ayatola Whoami, Teemo KHJ, BJBee FinalBlow, Seon Tien, BJBee 368, sup hifire, BJBee ForThePope, David Gradivus, Kyt Thrace, BJBee 8675, BJBee000, DHare3 Hellbound, Mifune SwordGod, Justin Schereau, BJBee 064, SgtCanadian Misha, BJBee 66666, Schizz Popinov...

(huff, puff)

Yoda Explosion, BJBee 101, Draunti Utrigas, BJBee 043, BJBee 654, Gan King, unholy truth, Star Motsu, Pacifyn, BJBee 659, uninstall 01, BJBee 1029, BJBee 76543, BJBee 697, Minor Nuisance, BJBee314, BJBee 760, Cheeseloving Gaoshi, BJBee251, Icedslayer Dash, TheDoctorUK, Git Guud Nurd, MrAssasin, Nicky-V, Scootercus, BJBee 785, BJBee 3247, Jewbacca Murica, BJBee 878, Kimberlay Trald, G Rod, Dragalis Miraxim, TheNurseUK, Updyke, Donna Medialis, Jiucyy Naari, BJBee 269, BJBee 783, The Pink Pansy, BJBee 5150, BJBee 606, Joco Skljoco, BJBee 0806, massiah Achasse, Major Sniper, grenus, Tiger Goodwin, BJBee 718, Norrec Lafisques, Folie1234, Ethamor, Pax Sex, Tyee 0301, Jade Theory, Nashoba, Foooka You Whale, Foooka You Dolphine, Captain Ham Solo, HSM Captain, and Natalya White performed elite PvP to score this kill.

Among other things, the jump freighter pilot was hauling a three-pack of PLEX. And people ask why Jita gets burned.

sam hassan somehow managed to fail-fit his Retriever with a capacitor tank and bloat the ship's value to 202 million isk. Don't worry, though--Agents Pod-Goo Repoman and Aaaarrgg were never going to let this one slide.

Coercers were the primary doctrine ship of Burn Jita. Perhaps it was an omen that at the beginning of this week, Arthur Timergaliev assembled a Coercer into one of the worst mining ships ever to disgrace the asteroid belts of highsec. Look at that nonsense. Agent Alexander Kirenski brought a Catalyst to the asteroid belt and showed Arthur how a destroyer is meant to be used.

After all this time, naked pods continue to streak through highsec trade routes. Leviathan I was caught autopiloting near Hek by Agent William Telluric, who has a zero-tolerance policy for unescorted pods.

Leviathan's pod traveled about as fast as a pod can go on autopilot. But it was only a matter of time before justice caught up with her.


  1. Woooah amazing kills of the week.

    So funny to see antiganking getting laughed out of jita.

    Praise James!!!!!!

  2. Ahhhhh. I had just missed out on running with everyone on that fleet too. Mebbe next time I'll be able to get my CONCORD baptism in.

  3. Over half a trillion ISK worth of law-breaking ships were cleansed in anti-matter. Where were the anti-gankers? What were they even doing?

  4. Can't get over that Heron. What was she thinking? No mods, cargo hold full of BPCs; and to top it all she tries to traverse Aufay with Eva Mavas in residence. Sheesh.

    Even I'm eyes-everywhere when I travel through there; and I have my Permit sitting proudly in my bio!

  5. This post made me buy mining permit.
    Ex-Ag miner. Praise James 315

    1. Anon 229,
      Please post with your main if you are a proud permit-holder.

    2. (it's your latest acquisition, he trusts no one by the way. Have fun with him.)

    3. Nighttime Video - you need to train your irony detection skills. Obviously for the reason you stated they are not proud. XDXD

  6. But where oh where is Ming?

  7. The highsec failitia had all weekend to stop gankers in the Burn Jita event, and they failed at every opportunity.

    Why would anyone call themselves "anti-ganking" when in reality all ag did was provide even more ships to kill? And right on our warp-ins. Thanks "ag".

    So not only did they NOT save a single target, they actually contributed to the overall ISK destroyed by not knowing how to play the game.

    Oh and that 2 hours or more that ag wasted guarding a gankers alt decoy freighter while Jita burned, EVERYONE was laughing about that, even the CCP gank alts that were there.

    ag, now is the time for Seppuku. You cannot dishonor yourselves any more than you did this weekend, do the right thing.

    In game of course you silly Kalynn wannabes!


    1. I too found that anti-ganking merely served to provide additional targets for us to shoot at our leisure after the freighter ganks.

      They also provided the valuable service of returning our empty pods to the staging station, saving us the journey back. Often it would take no less than four of them to destroy my pods.

      I have never seen so many anti-gankers in one area, yet so much total failure.

  8. So.....

    Where is ag now?

    Will the "highsec militia" disband? (Let's face it, you can't disband something that does not exist)

    Will kip winger ever find a good 'pvp skills' bookmark? (If you get that one you were in burn jita fleet, or you are kip)

    How many ships could a white knight save IF a white knight could save ship?

    Where is that shitter kotex at lately?

  9. "So not only did they NOT save a single target . . ."

    Really? Not a single one, huh? Must be that "new math", where one=none? Because I know for a fact that at least one save was recorded:

    Note I didn't say only one was saved, only that I have one save recorded.

    And in anticipation of his standard reply:
    Nitetime Video: "Virus. Didn't click."


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