Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Rusell's Revenge, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Disgraced leader of the anti-Code "movement" Rusell returned to the Anti-Ganking channel to deliver a fiery sermon against the New Order. But could he make his fellow rebels forget about his most recent defeats--and get them to embrace him as their leader once more?


Rusell sidled up to Jennifer en Marland, one of the channel moderators. A few words of flattery to consolidate his position and Rusell was on his way.


That was enough sucking up. Rusell pivoted from his unsolicited compliments and got ready to wind himself up for another anti-Code rant. He began by cursing the mighty CODE. alliance for ruining Red Frog Freight's profit margins.


Rusell expressed his insincere appreciation for PvP'ers of all stripes. He had no problem with risk in highsec, you see. But he made an exception for Goons and CODE. They took the whole PvP/risk thing too far.


Rusell offered his most cogent explanation yet of why he couldn't accept the gankers, despite loving PvP and risk. According to Rusell, ganking exploits a flaw in the highsec game mechanics--mechanics which CCP hasn't put the finishing touches on after 14 years.


Tickles TheClown came to the Anti-Ganking channel seeking help with wardecs his corp had received. Instead, his concerns had been shrugged off by Rusell, who saw non-CODE. adversaries as a mere distraction.


Rusell again advised Tickles to simply drop corp and avoid the PvP and risk he loved so much. With that problem solved, Rusell returned to his sermon about CODE.'s "exploits".


It soon became clear that Rusell's reputation for unquestioned wisdom had indeed taken a hit. Bogus Military Jargon challenged him to name an exploit used by CODE. Rusell side-stepped the question by repeating his accusations.


Rusell claimed that CODE. exploits exploits in the game. Needless to say, it's an outrageous lie. From its inception, our organization has always acted well within the boundaries of the EULA. We're arguably the most EULA-compliant group in EVE.


Jennifer urged Rusell to put aside his burning hatred for the New Order. But Rusell was committed to his mission of vengeance.


Carebears complain that highsec is too dangerous because they don't "expect" to be attacked there. One might assume that all of our warnings over the past five years haven't gotten these Goofuses to adjust their expectations. More likely, the skill and stealth of our Agents is so great that we're always able to take our enemies by surprise. This is known as elite PvP.


Tickles' pity party threatened to divert too much attention, so Rusell quickly got the conversation back on track by talking about himself again.


As Rusell began another speech, he name-dropped a corporation called Iustitiae. Rusell founded Iustitiae in September 2015. Since then, Rusell had moved heaven and earth to try to get the corporation to grow. In spite of his efforts, the corp's population flatlined.


This is the corp's entire EveWho join history. Iustitiae currently has one member.


The Anti-Ganking channel had nothing better to do than to listen to Rusell reminisce about the once-great Iustitiae. At its height, it had two members.

At any moment, Rusell could snap out of his doldrums and launch his next attack against CODE. Would the New Order survive?

To be continued...

29 comments:

  1. "The miners are bots. The miners are quite literally less than human. They deserve to be wiped out, every last one of them. To the extent that they still feel anything, it should only be fear, humiliation, and misery." James 315 - XII.II.MMXI

    \0/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. These players have little or no experience in EVE and the ever changing game play. THIS IS EVE !!!. Make your own play style but be smart about it or you will be spanked.

      Delete
    2. The code is bots always doin the same repetitive action day in and day out with nothing but their programmer to praise.

      Delete
  2. "The Anti-Ganking channel had nothing better to do than to listen to Rusell reminisce about the once-great Iustitiae. At its height, it had two members"

    James never fails make me lol. He should run for CSM. Heads would explode, tears would rain down, and I'm pretty sure some wives and children would suffer.

    In game of course.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haahhaaha I giggled a little.

      Delete
    2. He will not be elected. He has already broken the law by impersonating an elected official.

      Delete
  3. Rusell sure is a shitter

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Doh! You beat me to it. ;)

      But yea, I fear Rusell will never be capable of understanding just how ignorant he is. Everything he bitches about being wrong with EVE, is what actually makes EVE great and unique.

      Rusell is a dangerous shitter at that. If it were up to him there would eventually be no PVP in EVE without the written consent of all parties involved.

      Delete
    2. Language. This is a family game. Follow your code.

      Delete
    3. Anon437 The Code says:
      "Keep local clean. MINERS should be courteous in local and should refrain from the use of profanity."

      Your impotent rage is obvious. As is your failure to read/comprehend the Code, miner.

      Lol nice try, but this isn't local chat. So I would suggest you watch how you speak to a superior.

      Just sayin'

      ;)

      Delete
    4. We're all shitters:)

      Delete
  4. It's quite painful watching Rusell writhe his way through a conversation. Thank goodness we have James as a guide.

    I know English isn't the guy's first language, but what he says is utter drivel anyway, so it doesn't matter. It wouldn't sound any better in his own tongue.

    Banter and blather aside, he's quite a nasty piece of narcissism. And here, I mean the person and not the character.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Leave the RL person out of the gaming environment.

      Delete
    2. This is out of game.

      Are you so enraged that you cannot see the difference?

      Rusell needs help, and you would deny him that by "keeping it in game"?

      Just to try to make a point huh? Way to fail daily ag, you gonna lose another one if you don't get him help.

      Delete
    3. Anon 0438, thanks for your suggestion. Ordinarily, I don't pay too much attention to in/out of game personality. But let me tell you something:

      There are some personality traits you can fake quite easily - the villain, the saint, etc. Some people can even sustain the invention without trouble; but it is usually invention. Real saints, real villains are unlikely to be attracted to EVE.

      However, one of the types of person who is attracted to the game, is he or she who wants an audience and doesn't mind getting one via a point-and-click space-sim. In this case, the very narcissistic Mr Rusell.

      ...Unless you, Anon, have anecdotal evidence that folks are joining the player base in order to role-play egotists and narcissists?

      It's just one of those things people don't fake; ergo I believe Rusell to be the same in or out of game. And I certainly won't apologise for saying so!

      Delete
  5. Gud gawd, Rusell you need a new hobby. For your own safety and mental health, you need a break from EVE.


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Leave RL out of the gaming environment.

      Delete
  6. Ehnea have you subbed yet?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nope she remains a hero of high sec.

      Delete
    2. No. I haven't. Now cry tears for me, bawhawhawhaw.

      Delete
    3. Ehnea projecting is always lulzy, but your "bawhawhaw" seems forced. Gritting those teeth I bet. Be easy on those welfare choppers friend, I hear they are much softer than real ones.

      Try harder.

      No wait, try harder in RL. Like an education and a job maybe, so you can afford to contribute. The only other explanation I can think is that you are only here to try and get revenge on whoever made you rage quit last time, or the time before that.

      If you want to be part of this community you need a subscription and a permit.

      If you don't contribute, your opinion don't count.

      You will pass in time, like all the other mad shitters, but while you are here you should show the proper deference, miner.

      Delete

    4. AnonymousJune 15, 2017 at 3:28 PM

      No. To all the demands you made.

      Delete
  7. Nothing like seeing frogs splatted on the gates of uedama.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. May many frogs hop down your throat.

      Delete
  8. I wonder if I can turn Ehnea into a subbed, compliant, and better behaved miner

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Subbed? Depends entirely on me.
      Compliant? Baw-haw-haw! Errr, no.
      Better behaved? Hey, be nice to me and I'll be nice back. Simple!

      Delete
  9. How is Jen Maryland these days?

    ReplyDelete
  10. "According to Rusell, ganking exploits a flaw in the highsec game mechanics--mechanics which CCP hasn't put the finishing touches on after 14 years."

    Well - in the guy's defence... Eve is.. in some ways a laughably awful game. And there's much that should have been improved upon over the last 14 years, but hasn't.

    Sure Eve is a great big sand box and for that you can forgive a lot but... So much of it is absurdly primitive. The interface, the environments.. it's all very dated. Some of that is on the devs who may just think they can milk their cash cow with minimal reinvestment - a visual tweak here and there.. etc, but a lot of it is on the player-base who.. upon reading the forums are some of the most closed minded and change-averse people out there.

    -- and maybe that's why player numbers are down and why Star citizen raised 148 million bucks. Regardless of whether Star Citizen game is any good, it proves there's demand for what Eve could/should have been.

    ReplyDelete

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