Monday, November 11, 2013

High-Level Diplomatic Correspondence

When I'm not tipping my hat to a new shareholder, or taking my hat off to the responsible citizens of highsec collectively, I wear a lot of hats. One of the hats I wear is that of Diplomat-in-Chief. It's one thing to encourage people to gank random miners, but when you're building a civilization... Well, that involves a lot of paperwork.


Absalom Gerhardt filed a formal complaint against Agent Alyth Nerun. I wasn't familiar with Alyth before this, but after reading Absalom's complaint, I already had a high opinion of the new Agent. However, I still had to answer the petition. That's what a Father of the New Order does (when he feels like it).


I dashed off a quick reply with some advice on handling the situation. Generally, obeying the Code and paying a bumper 10 million isk per mining character will clear things up. Sending an Agent his money is like rebooting your computer--you should always try it first.


Infected Space-Monkey wasn't happy when Agent Gaylord Fappington destroyed his ship, so he flung some ironic insults at him. That's fine. This was a low-level matter, and it didn't need my attention. But Gaylord's next act of Code enforcement was another story.


You see, governing highsec is a lot like reading "Game of Thrones". You need to know all of the different families and houses and conflicting loyalties and such. For example, Gaylord Fappington is of the highsec Fappingtons, one of the most well-regarded families in empire space. You see their good work everywhere.


But because the New Order transcends corporations, alliances, and coalitions, things can get complicated in a hurry. Gaylord is an Agent, but is also a member of GoonSwarm Federation, the most powerful of the nullsec alliances. What happens when worlds collide?


Tyler Oney, the CEO of a small highsec mining corporation, was disturbed by Gaylord's enforcement of the Code. He sent a complaint to the Goon CEO, The Mittani. Note that even when speaking with the leader of the largest EVE alliance, a highsec carebear will still claim to "have friends in larger corps then yours".


Could a conflict between Gaylord and Tyler lead to the New Order being drawn into a war with the Goons? Luckily, The Mittani was more interested in settling the score with Tyler Oney, whose breach of diplomatic protocol didn't impress the sophisticated nullsec leader.


The New Order dodged a bullet. Tyler's wrath shifted away from Agent Gaylord Fappington and toward The Mittani and his thousands of Goons. Despite Gaylord's role in the kerfuffle, he and the New Order were able to slide by.


The Mittani tweeted about the incident and gave our hero some much-deserved kudos. All's well that ends well. Another catastrophe averted.


As we saw with the Fappington Affair, EVE galaxy can, at times, resemble a powder keg. Actually, most EVE players are eager for peace. When Erotica 1 planted some Sovereignty Blocking Units (SBUs) in Providence on a whim, an interested party contacted CODEdot's CEO Khoda Khan and suggested we join the N3 coalition.


And time, of course, heals all wounds. Remember Reaver Revaer from edition #45 of the Highsec Miner Grab Bag? The screenshot above was his response to getting ganked. But just a few days later...


...another victory for the New Order. Time is always on our side. We're running a marathon, not a sprint. In the end, highsec will be ours.

24 comments:

  1. The Tyler series from Mittens is hard to get through... so many huge walls of text tears.

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  2. Nobody is naive enough to believe that CODE is anything but a Goon puppet. Dream on...,

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. /me checks for black and yellow stripes around self, or confident swagger that comes from being the dominant force in nullsec

      nope. just me in dr pepper sleeping pants...and the only string is the drawstring holding them up.

      Delete
  3. All these people are always complaining you guys are praying on the weak. TBH I'd complain to James too if you prayed on me. How does that work exactly? Do you sit or stand on them while you say your prayers? What about all the whining and squirming? Does that bother you while you pray?

    Maybe thats why so many people call you guys a cult, you're always praying on people.

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  4. Eh same junk diffrent day. James you need to get your act together. You, your corp, your alliance is all a joke. You all claim to be elite pvpers yet all we see is made up trash kills d400 is a joke half of his kills are set up if not all of them. Show a real battle that "CODE" gets into and walks away victorious. Remember James when we say real battle we mean something other then a mining barge or a orca. You and i both know that will never happen your crew just dont have the balls or the backbone. Erotica1 now thats biggest waste of space that ever walked the face of the earth nobody has ever won a "bonus room" I even laugh when i say bonus room when referring to Erotica1. Might as well call it give us all your possessions while we laugh and make a complete tool out of you. Your band of merry men don't even know the meaning of the word honor and integrity. Anybody who reads this site with half a brain can tell that your group is nothing but poor bullied white trash kids that stay at home with momma because your too afraid to go outside. Seriously man get with the program and lets see the so called Saviour of HIghsec do something actually good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Summarize this wall of text: "I'm butthurt"

      Delete
    2. “You all claim to be elite pvpers” Actually, this is often times used to inspire more tears toward someone who is unwilling, or unable to comprehend what PvP means. Elite PvP’ers, as I see them, are those too afraid to undock in fear of tarnishing their KB and would rather be EFT Warriors.

      “d400 is a joke half of his kills are set up …” Oh my goodness! You’re so right! The hundreds of billions worth of isk was all set up! I mean, that shuttle carrying Plex!!! Man, he so went to Jita.. Bought the Plex.. Brought it back in a shuttle just so he could kill it! You’re an idiot.

      “Show a real battle that "CODE" gets into …” Clearly you don’t read, or can’t read. So, there was this Low-sec tower, right? N.O. attacked this tower, right? People came to try and stop this, right? N.O. won. All this time you whinebears cry that Exhumers can’t shoot back and when N.O. accomplishes a goal where it sends agents to an area where anyone can free-fire on just about anything, you gloss over it… probably because it doesn’t support your whining.

      “Erotica1… nobody has ever won a "bonus room" Erotica is an amazing person. And people have won the Bonus Room… You just have to show complete faith.

      Ehh, I try not to write walls of text, so I’ll sum everything else up. We are happy, thanks. You have to earn our respect (honor/integrity). Anybody who reads this site is above average in intelligence. I live in a flat away from my parents. James 315 is saving High-sec, if that’s not “good” then I don’t know what is.

      Delete
    3. also, mr anonymous #6,728,402 - perhaps you arent aware that the New Order is represented by MANY more corps, in MANY other alliances. a player by the name of loyalanon, just for example, leads kills of a more tactical nature than the pursuit of compliance. i assure you pvp ships die every day to New Order hands.
      unless you think lokis, or golems arent pvp ships when we killed them 2 nights ago.

      Delete
    4. "You and i both know that will never happen your crew just dont have the balls or the backbone."

      And yet YOU, Mr. (Ms.?) Anonymous, post without identifying yourself. Now if THAT is not the definition of the pot calling the kettle black, I don't know what is...

      -Mila McShanks

      Delete
  5. I feel like Pee Wee Herman, watching his adventure on the big screen in the form of a spy thriller. I lived it James, but only you could tell the tale the way it needed to be told. May my gratitude echo forth from the guns of my Catalysts.

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    Replies
    1. Exactly how I felt.

      It's why he is the master.

      Delete
    2. You are a gentleman and a scholar, Fapp.

      Delete
    3. Good job, sir, keep it up!

      -Mila McShanks

      P.S. Can someone give me a quick how-to on setting up my name so I don't have to keep posting anonymously? I am not very tech-savvy... Send me an email in-game or reply here plznthx!

      Delete
  6. My favorite quotes for this post:

    James 315 > However, I still had to answer the petition. That's what a Father of the New Order does (when he feels like it).
    > Have the miners tried paying him off?

    Infected Space Monkey > I hope hemorids on ass take over for you

    Tyler Oney > Third. WE got to war. and I go after everyone. ... I dont want any problems man...

    LOL

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    Replies
    1. Mine was
      "I have friends in larger corps then yours".
      I wish we had a camera on him when he finally looked up who he was threatening.

      Delete
    2. "hemorids on ass" LOL

      I believe he meant hemorrhoids, and I understand it is a hard word to spell, but the clarification of where they cause issues... Priceless!

      -Mila McShanks

      Delete
    3. Mine was:

      "Sending an Agent his money is like rebooting your computer--you should always try it first."

      Comedy gold right there!

      - Guybertini

      Delete
  7. Three days in the belts of Frarn and it already made it to the frontpage. I feel honored.

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    Replies
    1. You're doing quality work. Keep it up!

      Delete
    2. "For those who save the rocks,
      We o7 You!"

      -Mila McShanks humming AC/DC

      Delete
  8. "I have friends in larger corps then yours".

    Hmmm well they're no good to you playing World of Tanks or Warcraft or whatever it is they do.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Some 8 man carebear corp threatened The Mittani? ROFLMAO OMG I hope there is a follow up to this.

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  10. Note that even when speaking with the leader of the largest EVE alliance, a highsec carebear will still claim to "have friends in larger corps then yours"

    LOL!!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I have no problem with CODE. joining N3. On a few conditions. First we rename the coalition NO4, then every member has to uphold the code one a month, lest they get purged. Truly we're bringing law to the lawless.

    ReplyDelete

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