Sunday, November 10, 2013

Hats Off, or One Hundred Fifty Billion in Shares Sold

Take a good look at the picture below. It's a picture of me, so I shouldn't need to twist your arm:

Notice anything missing? You guessed it: I'm not wearing a hat. That's because my hat's off--to you, you productive citizens of highsec, you busy little bees. Today we've reached an extraordinary milestone: Over 150 billion isk worth of New Order shares have been sold! Many shares have been sold just in the last few days.

Some from old shareholders...

...and some from new.

Kremlin-watchers, take note of the maneuvering between members of the GoonSwarm economic cabal. Goon CFO Weaselior dramatically increased his ownership of New Order shares in what appears to be a deliberate bid to out-purchase CSM representative and fellow cabal member mynnna.

And then there's the feel-good story of the week. Regular readers of the MinerBumping Forum have probably encountered oOReikaOo Michiko. A few weeks ago, her fuse was lit when Agent Brutal Anna suicide-ganked her 66 million isk Retriever. That may not sound like a big deal, but apparently it was.

The gank prompted Reika to start a thread in which she pondered,
"So lets say I wanted to destroy The New Order. How would I go about disrupting your plans? Of course Hypothetically speaking since this latest escapade has confirmed for me I should never ever leave my hangar, but maybe one day when I have like 100 mil SP I may want to clean the Eve universe of trolls."
The talk of never leaving her hangar concerned Agent John E Normus, who encouraged her not to quit. Reika sighed,
"Im not going to , probably .. I dunno yet .. I was really excited after talking to the people at EVE Vegas but none of them are responding now that the boobs arent in their faces -.- so back to being a small tiny miner in a vast empty wasteland of death"
Things seemed to be going well until I posted about one of Erotica 1's bonus rounds, which unfortunately resulted in a Code-violating miner losing all of his possessions. The post caused Reika to go into a downward spiral, marked by a MinerBumping forum thread entitled, "Frankly im sick to my stomach disgusted":
"I wished Erotica1 a happy birthday because I think everyone deserves a happy joyous birthday... but now I can only truly say I wish that Erotica1 would die in front of his PC releasing his bowels on his chair, and being discovered alone with 50 cats eating his corpse."
Things went downhill from there. Finding little support for her anti-Order sentiment on the New Order forum, Reika decamped to the official EVE forums, where she started a thread in the Assembly Hall subforum, entitled "[Request] Review of possible New Order EULA Breach".

Unlike most Assembly Hall threads, this one attracted quite a bit of notice, as Reika went into detail about the New Order's alleged cyber-bullying. (For the record, I would never allow cyber-bullying in the New Order. Part of the reason I created the Order in the first place was to strike back against the bot-aspirants, whom I consider to be guilty of passive-aggressively bullying in the way that they refuse to accept my leadership.)

Reika didn't get a very warm reception on EVE-O, either, but she promised to fight the good fight:
"Im currently having the evidence reviewed by a specialist in cyberbullying. I should have it within the week."
Due to the activity of this thread, no fewer than three CSM representatives replied.

However, they didn't take her side. Reika had no choice but to concede:
"And oh btw GM Riven , you suck , told you it would be a **** storm. I told you I didn't trust the CSM , and I hope you can see why now."
But wait! I told you that this was a feel-good story. It is. Reika had a change of heart and announced her intention to become a shareholder in the New Order! Indeed she did, purchasing a billion isk worth of shares.

So let's get down to it.

oOReikaOo Michiko earns a Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™ for her purchase of 1,000 shares, which sent us over the 139 billion mark. Agent Bing Bangboom earns a Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™ for his purchase of 1,050 shares, which sent us over the 140 billion mark. Leia Jadesol is up next, earning a Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™ for her purchase of 500 shares, which sent us over the 141 billion mark.

Then came Weaselior, whose purchase of 4,145 shares sent us past the 142, 143, 144, and 145 billion marks. Clearly, a Quadruple Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™ was in order for that one. Last, but certainly not least, Pooboi earns a Quintuple Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™ for his purchase of 5,500 shares, which sent us over the 146, 147, 148, 149, and 150 billion isk marks.


I'm happy to say that most of the new isk has already gone to reimburse Agents of the New Order for the gank ships they exploded while bringing Code violators to justice. Your efforts are greatly appreciated by all.


  1. I challenge these shareholders to beat my investment.

  2. oh man, woman or what ever you are this is getting old! The same as you are OLD and slow!
    I have and am right now in some of so called New Order space and i ve been mining afk and botting nothing has happened i have 10 alts out at once!
    Its good to know that when you move on to the next system the old system is free from you and your cult followers....
    More to come soon

    The One that knows you in RL TOO


    Now Guess Who

    1. No pics, no proof, no one cares.

    2. Yes!! THANK YOU!!!

      First you give us the 'ole "I'm mining anyway" argument - I refer you to the Code (you READ the Code right?)

      "Q. HA HA I am mining ice right now, you can't stop me!

      As Supreme Protector, some may expect me to doggedly enforce the rules at all times against all offenders. This is a misperception of my role. Aside from those who have purchased indulgences, I will bump whomever I choose, whenever I choose. Your mining operations are entirely at my mercy. If I feel like stopping you from mining, I will; if not, I won't."

      Then you hit us with vague RL threats. (You're seeing AND watching us? EVERY day of the week? :shudder:)

      Then you finish with "Now Guess Who"

      Congrats anon poster- you really stuck it to us!!

      I simply can't wait for your "More to come soon"!


    3. Hey Guess Who, that's a pretty fun gig. I have a better one, I get an untraceable disposable cell phone, then call the local sheriff's department and claim that I'm speeding on a public thoroughfare. I mean, talk about ownage, I'm just laughing and laughing and all they can do in return is hang up on me, raging impotently at my godlike power! Do you do that too? What a rush! Whenever I walk by a police officer later, I kinda get a little stiffy, thinking about how they think they're so big and bad with their badge and gun, but I've completely ruined their life with my little phone calls, and they don't even know it. Can you believe that? Call me later, ok?


      Guess Who Two (Too?)

  3. "Im currently having the evidence reviewed by a specialist in cyberbullying. I should have it within the week."

    How does one specialize in cyberbullying?

    1. well one is a lawyer. starts playing eve. gets his ship destroyed or assets stolen.
      tadaaa specialist in cyber bullying.
      but to not to discriminate other people, beeing a lawyer is not necessary, beeing a space lawyer is fine too.


    2. It's offered as part of a dual degree program in space lawyering.

  4. As a brief aside: I was very pleasantly surprised to see Frying Doom purchase 500 shares, as I remember that he used to be anti-New Order on the forums. It renews hope in my heart that reason and good intentions win in the end. Welcome, Frying Doom!

    1. I gave him an inside look at the glorious bonus rounds and all the documentation. He's been hit by Cupid's arrow. :o)

      I can't speak for his gaming style, but I can say that he is a good guy who enjoys seeing people take responsibility for their actions.

  5. galactic-rock-hounds are botting and breaking the code. look them up

    Character: Elvira jones Arjar flys orca and they have at least 5 hulks.

  6. I thank you guys for fueling my catalysts, which will be repaid by more tears to come.
    ~McCope McCopenhagen

  7. I am filled with joy to see the New Order continue to grow and thrive, and anxiously await the day when I can take up arms once more in the name of the Code.

    Much love for our shareholders, our veteran crusaders, and all the new faces of the order.

    -Galaxy Pig


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