Sunday, September 18, 2016

Kills of the Week

The New Order was on the march again this week, winning numerous impressive victories against its enemies. The bots and bot-aspirants were in full retreat. While the forces of the Code fought bravely, the carebears were stricken with panic and behaved in a dishonourable fashion. Let's examine some of the more memorable battles that took place during the week of September 11th @ 00:00 EVEtime through September 17th @ 23:59 EVEtime.



MitsUki Eriker wasn't autopiloting; she wasn't even AFK. In fact, she sought out combat with Agents Booster Mord and Krig Povelli. Big mistake.


Suicide ganking isn't as easy as our Agents make it look. Marauder pilots, leave ganking to the professionals. Or better yet, join the New Order and we'll show you how it's done.



Every so often, the identity of a truly exceptional highsec criminal must be brought to highsec's attention. Such is the case with Solarminx, who managed to lose more than twenty billion isk over the past several months, while mining in highsec. Agents Zaleuth and Haleuth eliminated only the latest of her blingy Mackinaws, as well as a billion isk pod. Earlier this year, Solarminx lost a 2.3 billion isk Mackinaw(!) which she flew near Jita during a wardec. Code enforcers, please be on the lookout for this dangerous miner.



Kul Teil proved one of the laws of carebear behavior: Any time CCP introduces something new into the game, carebears will find a way to do something stupid with it. Kul's 2.4 billion isk Gila was destroyed by Agents Eva Mavas, Lucia, and Snapcase. It was filled with skins, including a titan skin worth over a billion isk. For some reason, Kul thought it belonged in the cargo bay of his Gila.



Linuz Vip's fuel bay was filled with fuel, but his heart and mind were empty. By contrast, Agents Winnie Po0h, Jayson Kusion, Turkey Baster, Jason Kusion, ThatOleSerpent, Chapo Muerte, Allise Soprano, Kblickens, Jackson Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Justin Kusion, Joel Kusion, Jake Kusion, Milkmypigeon, and KoHfeTHbIu TpoLLb were fueled by the promise of the Code. Even with plenty of fuel for his jump drive, Linuz could go nowhere. Our Agents, armed with the Code, can go anywhere they choose.



Speaking of carebears interacting badly with a new EVE feature: Kachirly Foundation corp set up a citadel in Uedama. Their illegal operations were soon challenged by the Uedama Permit inspection corp, which promptly declared war. Our heroes won! Congrats to Agents Ben Li, Zuzu Aqua, Zahard Ignis, Spryt3, Beliar Gray, Velia Canus, Gentaros, and Kristopher Rocancourt.



Unselm practiced the outdated, dying tradition of autopiloting through highsec in a shuttle. It was the most expensive journey he ever took. Agent XENOs Edmalbrurdus spotted the 3 billion isk pod and practiced one of the New Order's own customs.


Look at all those combat implants! As the saying goes, you can put lipstick on a bot-aspirant, but it's still just a bot-aspirant.

5 comments:

  1. Is this really ANOTHER week of failure from antiganking? looks ilke it!!!

    The Code always winning!!!!!1

    ReplyDelete
  2. But where oh where is Ming?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ben Li is such a scrub wannabe

    ReplyDelete
  4. You can put lipstick on a pig, but it will always be James 315.

    BM

    ReplyDelete

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