Sunday, March 11, 2018

Kills of the Week

Fact versus fiction. People get fed a lot of nonsense about not needing a permit, not needing to obey the Code, etc. (Sadly, newbros are disproportionately victimized by this sort of anti-Code propaganda, which only gets them killed.) But there comes a time in every EVE player's life when he is confronted by undeniable facts--in the form of API-verified killmails. What you are about to see are six examples of facts, from the week of March 4th @ 00:00 EVEtime through March 10th @ 23:59 EVEtime.

"I can get away with flying a 1.4 billion isk Mackinaw. I'll never get caught. Even the mighty CODE. alliance can't be everywhere at once." Such were the musings of Morgulus Estidal. Perhaps he found these delusions comforting--until his inevitable demise at the hands of Agents iZaEaRl, Throatslashar, and Aine Earl.

Our Agents observe a lot of poorly fit ships that attempt to pass through Uedama. A Cupcake's Golem takes the cake. It was unarmed for some reason, it was capacitor-tanked for some reason... and it still managed to be blingy! Agents Joel Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jason Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Jake Kusion, and Justin Kusion defended the honour of Uedama by taking A Cupcake out.

Big Bob Jackson's armor said, "Don't bother." But his expensive cargo--and his lack of a New Order permit--screamed, "Shoot me!" Agents holdmybeer, Ruby Rozei, Christine Rozei, The Confiscator, Koruma Darrknauv, Shanade Rozei, Tawny Rozei, Sherri Rozei, Trump The King, Lagatha Rozei, Giselle Rozei, Ivanka Rozei, Katy Rozei, Baron Rozei, Harletta Quinn, Kermakakku, and Lobo El Lobo listened to the angels perched on their shoulders and ganked the carebear.

Dabomb04 chose not to tank his jump freighter, preferring to boost the ship's speed instead. But as we all know, an AFK autopiloting hauler without a permit is going nowhere fast but zKillboard. Agents Tax Collector Larry, Tax Collector AynRand, Tax Collector HongMei, Australian Excellence, Trump The King, Shanade Rozei, Tax Collector Hill, C-ta Vilosa, Tax Collector Stroheim, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Tax Collector Max, Tax Collector BokChoy, Christine Rozei, Sherri Rozei, Tax Collector Aruka, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector Richard, Giselle Rozei, Ruby Rozei, Tax Collector Kittens, Tawny Rozei, Lagatha Rozei, Katy Rozei, Ivanka Rozei, Baron Rozei, Harletta Quinn, and Lobo El Lobo deleted another 21 billion isk from EVE's black market economy.

Mike Doran had 38.9 billion isk on the line, but he sure didn't act like it. He could've activated his jump drive at any time to teleport to safety. That is not the way of the Goofus, however. And Mike Doran was most definitely a Goofus.

Agents Tawny Rozei, C-ta Vilosa, Ruby Rozei, Trump The King, Sherri Rozei, Australian Excellence, Shanade Rozei, Lagatha Rozei, Ivanka Rozei, Katy Rozei, Christine Rozei, Giselle Rozei, Tax Collector Alison, Tax Collector Larry, Tax Collector HongMei, Tax Collector Aruka, Tax Collector Max, Tax Collector BokChoy, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Tax Collector Hill, Tax Collector Stroheim, Taxman Daniel, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector Kittens, Baron Rozei, Dr Hattrick, I eat RedCrayons, and Harletta Quinn instructed the misguided carebear in the ways of the Code with a gripping, relevant demonstration.

What a boring way to spend your isk. Judging by his cargo, being ganked was probably the first time this guy ever had any excitement in his life.

On occasion, our Agents hone their skills by doing a bit of casual target practice in a safer, lower-stakes, less-elite environment: Lowsec. Burenka Ololoev happened to be piloting a transport ship through lowsec, only to be ambushed by the New Order. He was then podded by Agents Trump The King, holdmybeer, and Lillie Naari, losing 3 billion isk in the process.

Some lowsec dwellers look down upon CODE., but the truth is that if we ever did decide to conquer lowsec for some reason, the whole rotten place would collapse in a week. Highsec PvP is EVE's endgame.


  1. wow just wow. ANOTHER week of failure from antiganking. Just continually non-stop failing daily and they STILL try.

    never forget shardani

  2. Mackinaw losses in highsec are not only silly, but unnecessary. Why do they not just fly Skiffs? How much more ore can he possibly be mining that warrants the need for a blingy mack over a tanky skiff?

    And how long will he have to mine in highsec to replace it? That must have been weeks or months even worth of highsec grubbing to pay off that fit.

    Let's face it, all.of these kills were mercy killings. The game and the community are better off now. Even if those carebears didn't learn anything it makes them easier to identify for more efficient enforcement action in the future.

    That level of ignorance should definitely be punished in EvE. Natural selection at work, and working as intended.


  3. So.....

    Where was ag?

  4. What a wonderful week. Keep up the good work everyone!

  5. This is a wonderful post. I enjoyed the information lot. I will bookmark this page. Thanks for sharing this information.

    1. Get out third world spambot shitter.


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