Thursday, March 1, 2018

The Return of Bob, Part 1

Miners, get your permits in order. Bob the Fourth is back.

I think that can be arranged:

Three hours earlier...

Expensive mining drones have become a serious problem in highsec. They're a sinister combination of decadence and insufficient tank. You don't even need to destroy a miner's ship to gank his drones.

Orca pilot Merkilo Tay probably assumed that her ship had enough hitpoints to discourage all but the most determined of gankers. Eventually, however, she realized that over 2 billion isk worth of mining drones had gone missing.

Merkilo tracked down the Agent who had smartbombed her drones to death, and she opened a private convo. She was hoping to get her drones back, but she got a bunch of New Order red tape instead.

Bob is a "by the book" kind of guy. Sure, he'd hand over billions of isk to reimburse a miner--but only after each and ever prerequisite was met. And Merkilo still had a long way to go.

Greedy carebears, on the other hand, prefer to cut corners.

Meanwhile, Merkilo was trash-talking our Agent in local chat. For future reference, miners, that's not how you ask someone for money.

Merkilo was eager to get the money and move on. She had lots of mining to do, after all. Agent Bob was moving much too slowly for her taste.

Previously, the miner had been laser-focused on isk. But at the very moment that she sensed she might have to part with some money of her own, she suddenly became concerned about right and wrong.

Now, at last, Merkilo's focus switched to protocol. She was confident that the Code had been broken--and not by her.

Bob wasn't buying what Merkilo was selling. Like pretty much every other Code-violator in highsec, Merkilo had been ganked by our Agents before. She knew the drill. Time to pay up.

Smart EVE players know that trustworthiness is in short supply in this game. You can trust the Agents of the New Order, and you can trust Chribba--and I'm not so sure about Chribba. But would Bob's word of honour be enough to persuade Merkilo to buy a mining permit?

To be continued...


  1. This Chribba might well offer a good service, however his failure to display a mining permit leaves much to be desired.

    It's safer to place your trust in us. The fact that no-one has ever been scammed by an Agent of The New Order speaks volumes.

    1. Never ever been scammed, that's all the guarantee a highsec miner will ever need.


    2. Newb question, who is Chribba?

    3. "Who is Chribba?" Wow that is a noob question.


      Chribba is the veldspar kang baybee!

      And he holds all the stuffs.

  2. Anybody who costs a russian and collects salt from siberia is good in my book.

    Get rekt ukranian.

  3. wow just wow antigankers are failing so hard right now.

    why are they having meltdowns left right and center?

  4. Hurray! Bob is back! (Everybody act like we've been busy!)

    1. I love his professionalism. I bet will sell that permit!

  5. The New Order is the most honest organization in eve. Unlike the goons, they honor their ransoms.

    1. Lol sounds like another Pandemic Horde anti ganker. Why you hate'n on Gewnz, PHag?


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