Thursday, March 15, 2018

Parenting by the Code, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Neil Muutaras went to his friendly neighborhood Agent to buy a mining permit from her. Out of nowhere, the miner went on a foul-mouthed rant in local about the Code. Agent Alt 00 was considering her options when the miner suddenly made another about-face: He apologized for the rant and claimed his teenage son was to blame.


Anyone who enforces the Code is bound to come across a carebear who shifts blame to friends and family members who allegedly have access to his computer. With rare exceptions, these excuses are nothing more than that--excuses.


Neil didn't hesitate to throw his son under the metaphorical bus. That shouldn't be taken as evidence of his son's nonexistence, however. It's pretty standard behavior for highsec miners. Most of them would sell their own grandmother for a little extra isk.


Ah, there's that word: "Also." When uttered by an Agent of the New Order, you know that inspiration is about to strike.


Neil was once again the meek, mild miner that he'd been when he first approached Alt 00 and asked to buy a permit. Maybe there was something to Neil's story about his son. After all, why would he go on a psychotic tirade against the New Order in local, only to immediately send our Agent money and attempt to make amends?


As everyone in local looked on, Alt 00's idea took root in her mind and began to blossom.


In a situation such as this, a simple apology by EVEmail wouldn't do.


Protip: The name of the Saviour of Highsec is even more effective than the D-scanner. Speaking my name in local is usually enough to flush out a rebel or two.


Non-compliants hate to see their fellow miners obeying the rules. They know that every time a miner follows the Code, it brings more heat on the remaining rebels.


Before long, Alt 00 received a photo of the handwritten apology letter and portrait from Neil--or his son, Jacob:


Click here for full-size image.


For the sake of comparison.


Alt 00 found herself troubled by some of the flaws in the letter, especially the reference to "John 315". She considered that maybe this first attempt at an apology should be rejected out of hand, rather than being forwarded to the Saviour. So our Agent turned to the official diplomat for the mighty CODE. alliance: Light Neutron Blaster II.


Of course, Light Neutron Blaster II isn't the name of an EVE character; it's an item. Alt 00 made a rare use of the walking-in-stations feature to consult the item as one would an oracle.

She sensed its dissatisfaction.


Click here for full-size image. As you can see, Neil (or his son) retrieved the letter and made some alterations.


As our Agent pointed out, the most revealing thing about the letter was the condition of the paper itself. The letter had obviously been crumpled into a ball and thrown away, rather than being framed--or at least given a place of prominence on Neil's refrigerator. This miner (and his son, if he exists) still has much to learn about the Code, I think.

27 comments:

  1. Right Neil, that's a start. Now your boy needs to write that out 100 times over his school. I want to see that written 10 foot high.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Teaching your kids to mine while you "check dinner"

    Disgracefull!

    ReplyDelete
  3. wow just wow. antigankers are failing so hard right now. if they only had a non-autistic - non-cringey leader who isn't just taking all the donations for himself (i.e Thomas's 30 bil donation that went nowhere but to himself)

    antiganking are just failing so hard right now.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They're saving that money for a rainy day. XD

      Delete
  4. It's clear that Jamey and his CHODE. slaves would gank their own grandmother without a seconds hesitation.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If the grandmother in question was not Code compliant, then that would be the natural course of action.

      Delete
    2. My grandmother would cut off your balls and feed them to dogs. Hell yes I'd gank her if she played EVE. Cuz she'd gank me first.

      Delete
    3. If she didn't have a mining permit definitely.

      Delete
    4. PVP = <3

      So yeah, I'd gank my grnadma.

      Delete
  5. The only thing that 'kid' needed was an assbeating.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Wow you guys really cant separate game from reality.

    SAD.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Holy fuck you actually had some kid draw the carebear pirate king.

    Damn is that how you got shardani to kill his kid?

    Seems you got Apache saying its ok to beat your kids over a video game as well.

    Fucking losers, no wonder you complain about kids and shitheads in high sec, you're just as fucked in the head.

    Stay in your safe space children.

    P.S. Try to keep in in game because making one guy kill his kid was already way over the line. Don't start punishing kids in real life again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Speaking of ass-beating, this one is still salty from last night. XD

      Delete
    2. LOL. Best cringey rant of all time.

      Not our fault shardani got so upset over ganking and a video game.

      Even his wife said he wasn't a nice person in real life - but you missed that didn't you.

      Keep ranting and raving it generates traffic for the blog.

      You should have told him to keep it in game XD

      Delete
    3. Oh look. Fucktard speaks. Ok, fucktard, here's the deal. Any kid that 'jumps' onto his father's computer and starts typing shit like 'he' did deserves to get punished. Now I know worthless millennial scum like you think that means a discussion and a time out, but sorry, real humans spank their kids sometimes, when they have it coming. This must be why your pathetic generation is considered the worst of all time. Now go kill yourself. Not joking. Oh, and that POS killed his kid because he was Just. Like. You. Nobody 'made' him do it. You worthless pedophilic degenerate scumbag.

      No wonder you're so chickenshit you post as 'Anon'. What's it like being an actual coward? Are you proud of being a coward, scum? Inquiring minds and all that.

      Delete
    4. Hey apache do explain what it's like being so cowardly that you have to beat up on children and idiots to feel good.

      Then explain what your doing advocating for players top breast their kids over a video game.

      You know what don't bother you're the type of child abuser that needs to be thrown of a cliff

      Btw your profile is as anon as it gets so don't think because you put a name on it makes you any less of an anon.

      Or your real name out so people know where your child abuser ass is and maybe someone can get you the help you need or the ass beating you deserve for wanting to beat kids over some stupid video game.

      Delete
    5. Apache is trying to get someone else to commit suicide.

      Typical code behavior.

      Delete
  8. You guys need help if your seriously telling people to do things in real life to satisfy your in game impotent rage.

    Stop telling players to do shit to their kids.
    It's just a fucking game.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do you actually believe the miner had a kid. Pretty sure he's just a kid himself getting a ruse out of this page. That's one way to make a headline after all.

      Delete
    2. Still fucked up that your boys telling people to do things out of game, and wow looking at your boy apache I'd say he had a bit much anger telling people to kill themselves. Seriously if you acting like that you proving the anons point. Not code like behavior, your supposed to act professional not like miners.

      Delete
    3. No one is my "boy", I am posting anonymously and have claimed no allegiance to a side. I haven't played eve in years and I was mostly a highsec mission runner, got bored (surprise). Found out about this website afterwards and come here for lulz at work.

      Delete
    4. so much delicious salty tears XD XD

      Delete
    5. Wolf crying again.

      Delete
  9. Im still wanting to see screenshots of the dog from that autopiloter.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wow. That miner's son is as lazy and poorly disciplined as the miner himself. Retrieving the crumpled paper and scrawling a few corrections at the bottom? Also I'm pretty sure he wrote he was "Sally" instead of "sorry". A final draft is in order.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lawton, reveling in bringing RL into the game makes you a miner. You are just as sad as a miner now and are a disgrace.

      Keep it in game or you're a miner.

      Delete
  11. Sounds like a fake story to me. Nice try james, but your not fooling anyone.

    ReplyDelete

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