Sunday, July 7, 2013

Kills of the Week

We all had a blast celebrating the New Order's birthday last month, but now it's time to get back into the swing of things. We all have normal lives, after all. Let's take a closer look at some interesting kills made by the New Order during the week of June 30th @ 00:00 EVEtime through July 6th @ 23:59 EVEtime.

What's this? No, you're not seeing double. Illegal miner Worm H0 learned that when it comes to rebelling against the Code, persistence doesn't pay off--it just gets you killed twice. Agent Ophidia Black paid a follow-up visit to Worm an hour and a half after the first Hulk kill. Worm hadn't learned her lesson yet, so she got a refresher course in Code compliance.

There's a myth floating around out there that I'm against people reading while they mine. This is incorrect. I'm all in favor of miners who read--they need to read local. If they read the wrong things, they'll end up like wakko Dallocort. This bookish miner was caught mining in a Retriever with more than eighty skillbooks in the cargo. He probably thought he was in a single-player game and could spend all his days reading. Anyone remember that Twilight Zone episode "Time Enough at Last"? This story ended pretty much the same way. Agent Spine Ripper killed the miner and closed the library for good. If only wakko had read the Code!

Expensive things can come in small packages. Ivon Dragomiloff, a suspected bot-aspirant, was AFK in a shuttle. Agent D400 caught him loitering near a stargate. D400 didn't need to notify him before he opened fire, because all highsec residents are deemed to have been made aware of the New Order and its Code. Inexplicably, Ivon didn't take any action to get into compliance, despite being legally deemed to be on notice. His shuttle was popped, and his pod--worth more than 2 billion isk--exploded.

Agents of the New Order have traveled far and wide across our mighty empire. Even the Ammatar Mandate has been touched by the Order. SaberSeven became infuriated when he saw Agent Kalorned enforcing the Code by bumping some miners. SaberSeven brought his Pilgrim to attack, but he was swiftly destroyed by Kalorned and Agent CONCORD Police Captain. Kalorned provided the chat log:

SaberSeven > that is some pretty good bumping but yo realize somone will eventually show up and gank you right?
Kalorned > SaberSeven That's not possible
Kalorned > The stabber is invincible
SaberSeven > oh fuck it
SaberSeven > ill get concorded just to shoot him
Rebecca Ambrye > scann him first
SaberSeven > just gotta time it right
Kalorned > Sure thing buddy
Kalorned > time it
SaberSeven > i am suspect you could shoot me
Kalorned > Friend, violence is not hte answer
Kalorned > Think this trhough
Kalorned > And we can all go home and see our families
SaberSeven > eh my family sucks
SaberSeven > good-die
Kalorned > Oh dear

SaberSeven > ah bastards
SaberSeven > they ecm bow
SaberSeven > now**
Kalorned > Another criminal brought to justice

Of all the suicide gank ships that have been used in vain, SaberSeven's tech II fitted Pilgrim has got to be one of the finest. SaberSeven was astonished by its failure. His parting remark referring to Concord, "they ECM now", is a bit like exclaiming "guns fire bullets now?" Let this serve as a lesson to all. Concord uses ECM, guns fire bullets, and Agents of the New Order always, always win.


  1. Worm hadn't learned her lesson yet...

    What? Of course she learned a lesson: the first time she learned that a Small Shield Booster I did not save her from gank. So, the second time she changed her fit to have a Small C5-L Emergency Shield Overload.

    Too bad that one didn't save her either. But... she's learning!

  2. You know what would have been better to gank with than a Pilgrim?



  3. I guess carebears forget they ask for things like Concord to ECM you until it bites them in the ass.

  4. If only there was some reference on ganking available ....or some group of pilots you could learn the trade from....of course the problem is if there were such a group you might find out how much nicer they are than the rude, crude and socially unacceptable miners.

  5. But why 80 books, when he only needed just one to save him ?!

    After all, we are reasonable...

  6. SaberSeven clearly has his heart in the right place but could do with some advice. Talking of which I observed one of the most expertly executed ganks I have ever seen at the weekend.

    One second Bing Bangboom was bumping miners in Kino, the next, he was dispatched with a "boom" to much local applause.

    This was an "invincible" Fleet Stabber and in 0.7 space.

    I am told the local hero made a profit from the gank of the bumper as a result of the donations.

    1. As a frequent reader of this site I was surprised to read this.
      I wondered to myself if this was just makebelieve and set about finding the truth and I found
      Although with that said, it is not the 'traditional' invincible stabber fit with less tank in the midslots and propulsion rigs instead of shield rigs.
      One of the names on the killmail rang a bell...Jennifer en Marland...I had to look through the combat stories section to find it but she was featured in an article where she failed to gank James 315 himself with 3 catalysts and a Brutix. I can only presume she has become somewhat better at ganking since then.

  7. EMERGENT ATK \o/ We still win!


  8. The story is actually pretty interesting.

    What the Anonymous poster above failed to mention was that

    1) It was Jennifer en Marland in a Vexor assisted by
    2) a friend, Kaldar Andedare in a Caracal.
    3) The Saint Tsero was also in the ice field at the same time.

    So, I admit, I was playing around in a potentially (and eventually an actually) dangerous situation. Flying what I call the "Almost Invincible Fleet Stabber, since JeM has now cost me THREE of them, I bumped and zoomed around for close to an hour before the gank, with JeM and Kaldar yellow boxing and chasing me around the whole time. I would occasionally passive target one and loose a few rounds of Sodium Fireworks into their hulls making for a sight and sound extravaganza, all the while collecting the insults and tears of the admiring bot aspirant crowd.

    My tank, if you look at the kill mail, was somewhat compromised by the presence of a passive targeter and a ship scanner which I carry FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES only! In any case, I got to having too much fun and allowed them to get too close and BOOM! My (insured) 63 million ISK Stabber Fleet Issue was destroyed by.... about an equally amount of ISK of (uninsured) Cruiser fleet. The investigation will probably say pilot error.

    I will admit it was very bothersome to have to fly to Amarr and get another SFI. In a funk, I returned to Kino where I was somewhat involved in Spine Ripper's destruction of a Hulk, Retriever and 2 pods, exacting 300 million ISK worth of revenge on the local bot aspirant mining fleet. I'm feeling much better now, thanks for asking.

    I also possess a kill right each on JeM and Kaldar so I don't think I will be seeing them much in Kino for the next 29 days, 8 hours, 13 minutes.

    Highsec is worth fighting for.
    (Dying too apparently)

    Bing Bangboom
    Agent of the New Order of Highsec
    Belligerent Undesirable

    1. I was wondering when this was going to finally happen. Thank goodness the new kill rights allow us to hold to account those responsible for unseating an agent from his mount. I suspect that retribution will be swift and merciless.

    2. How dare they attack an official vessel of the New Order, especially one that is fitted for education and field research on not aspirants? Its like opening fire on a school bus. :(

    3. If only you'd have followed the Code, and equipped your Stabber properly... Such a shame for a so called Agent to fall in the sin of bot aspirancy.
      Speaking of botting, did you buy a bumping permit?

    4. Hi Bobbins ^

  9. Nullsec residents are busy folk. We at 401k have an ongoing disbute with some noisy neighbours and are the subject of two merc wardecs. However never let it be said that we tolerate code violators.
    Whilst this hero was taking time out to relax he saw a high sec criminal. Instantly he was hard at work with no thought to his own safety. Minus one 2.7 bill isk mining barge with no fittings.

    1. Now that's a nice covetor kill!


    2. I'm afraid nullsec is not of interest to the Order at the moment. We'll be coming for you as well soon enough, but for now our mission is to make Highsec compliant.

    3. What is that "we"? Are you a representative of the New Order now, Bobbins?


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