Saturday, May 17, 2014

Mission of Mercy, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Highsec mission runner Mrk9331 became enraged and wished rape upon Agent Malcolm Shinhwa, who looted his wrecks and disrupted the mission rats' aggro. Rather than attack Malcolm's Incursus with his Myrmidon, Mrk9331 accused him of stealing his money, time, and life.


Malcolm sagely pointed out that an EVE player with six years in the game might be wasting his own time by choosing a career of level 2 missions. When others in local starting chiming in, Mrk9331 insisted he wasn't really mad.


...But some doubted.


To prove he wasn't mad at Malcolm, Mrk9331 brought out the big guns. He dramatically revealed that he was an Educator and an English specialist. If Mrk9331 were truly angry, he could use his powers to cut to the core of Malcolm's "real person". So far, Mrk9331 had refrained, and Malcolm's real person remained unscathed. So far.


Mrk9331 elaborated on his earlier remark about wanting Malcolm to be raped. He explained that he was merely observing that Malcolm might himself be a rapist in real life. This he deduced from the fact that Malcolm had looted some wrecks.


Mrk9331 forgot about one thing, though. In highsec, it's the Agents of the New Order who do the educating. Carebears are the ones who need to learn.


Locals were amazed to hear that Mrk9331's rage was based on the loss of a few Hammerhead drones. What would Mrk9331 do if he lost a Retriever?


Despite his anger--and despite the fact that Malcolm's looting of wrecks made him freely attackable--Mrk9331 didn't open fire on Malcolm's frigate. He yellow-boxed it with his Myrmidon, but that was all. He knew it was silly to get so worked up about a few medium drones. It was the principle of the thing. Carebears put principle above all else.


The Miner Bingo quotes continued to dribble out. Mrk9331 just wanted to "relax" and to be left alone in the most crowded area of the most populated single-shard MMO in the world.


At length, Mrk9331 began to calm down. The reconciliation between Agent and bot-aspirant was cut short when the Educator had to go play soccer. (At least that wasn't an excuse for being AFK.)


And so it was that an English specialist discovered that even he still had things to learn. For the first time, Mrk9331 experienced EVE. An Agent of the New Order showed him that highsec hadn't forgotten him. When given an apology, Malcolm freely gave forgiveness in return. Now that's a mensch.

19 comments:

  1. "mensch ärger dich nicht!"
    please Jimmy stay with english, your stories are bad enough in every literal way. throwing in german words with the wrong meaning show, that you try to act smart, but you fail miserably.
    So, i was right, malmagot made guy upset, but couldnt bait him with his frigate. in this case even jimmes rewrite shows, that missionplayer was the smarter guy.
    :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, the person wishing IRL rape upon someone else in the game is the smarter guy.

      Delete
    2. Also he was using mensch in the Yiddish sense not the German sense

      Delete
    3. So........ Why do you even read the articleS are so bad. And hiding behind the anon tag.... Bitch when we enforce, bitch when we show mercy and forgiveness... Be a man name yourself and come play.

      Delete
  2. JUST GANK HIM AND BE DONE WITH IT
    >=(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. www.monkeyinthecage.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/the-thing-flamethrower.jpg

      Delete
    2. Really good to see Mrk calm down at the end. There's hope for him yet.

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    3. Well done, Agent Malcolm!

      Your patience and forgiveness is a shining example to us all - that in order to save high-sec, we must have a thick skin and sometimes expect others to wish RL violence upon us.

      By being patient with the carebear, you made him actually understand how poorly he was behaving, and by doing that you made high-sec a better place. I salute you.

      Delete
  3. your loosing it.
    your selfrightious texts have entertained me often during the last years.
    but they get more and more borring recently.
    like this one. so much text... so little smacktalk. not a single unit of veldspar.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. In one of your first two lines you used "your"correctly, in the other you didn't. Do you know witch witch is which? Homophones the worst kind of racism.

      Delete
  4. Jimbo is mad at mission runners now too?

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  5. Is this guy really an English educator? I noticed him making some spelling/use errors that are pretty obvious even to me.

    I think I believe him, though, because an impostor probably wouldn't whine that much about the boring parts of his job.

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  6. I would hope any teacher who thinks the children in his charge are thick would leave the profession immediately.

    Thick people don't run level 2 missions despite having an older character elsewhere, or whine about losing a few drones, or not take a shot at a legal target, despite being badly pve fitted.

    Oh wait.. Hmm.. like the age of the character is meaningless perhaps he's not really an educator at all. I noticed the spelling mistake did anyone else?

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  7. His rage is barely worthy of posting, but I suppose it was a lighter day then. Glad to hear he apologized, Malcolm is an alright fella... a lot better candidates for wishing RL rape upon.

    Now if only Malcolm realized the vast majority of CODE. would not have apologized in the same situation, maybe he'd stop defending their social behaviour so much. Food for thought, Malcy.

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  8. Kind of a bland ending but glad to see the apology!

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  9. the NO an Sarah Palin are doing GODS work

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would like to believe that Sarah Palin is a RL alt of James 315

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  10. An educator who specialises in English should know how to use their, there and they're properly.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well Done Agent Malcolm Shinwa, your expert management of the unruly Carebear and ultimate successful resolution of that situation was superb. Pure textbook example.

    Oh and this... "It was the principle of the thing. Carebears put principle above all else." ... Comedy gold!

    - Guybertini

    ReplyDelete

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