Tuesday, May 20, 2014

No Easy Awox, Part 1

He is one of the great monsters of highsec.


From his first appearance, TDD Dominaters has sought to oppose the New Order by any means at his disposal.


Luckily, TDD didn't have any means at his disposal.


That didn't stop TDD from periodically threatening our Agents and the Order we so cherish.


TDD briefly flirted with a Code-compliant lifestyle, but he found it too restrictive. So TDD renounced the mining permit he'd purchased, by mining AFK. He was caught and his license was revoked, as was his mining equipment. TDD vowed revenge.


Then came TDD's great transformation. He reinvented himself as a civic leader. From now on, he would run a highsec corporation of his own. Gone were the vile profanities and childish threats. He claimed the art of diplomacy as his "key of power".


But the carebear didn't understand diplomacy as well as he thought. His corporation soon ran afoul of the New Order. Now TDD would be a war leader.


The New Order was scandalized to learn the shocking truth about TDD's corporation. It recruited dozens of new EVE players and exploited them with a tax rate of 50%. And that was less than TDD originally proposed!


A glorious crusade unfolded. Within a short time, the New Order liberated the new players by forcing TDD to close the corp. Agents from Bad Touches also succeeded in forcing TDD to shut down subsequent corps.


Jer'ith Bodas chose to celebrate his EVE birthday by awoxing. Who would the target be? (Well, if not TDD Dominaters, this post has had a lot of setup that went nowhere.)


Nothing in highsec escapes the watchful eyes of the New Order. TDD was caught exploiting new EVE players yet again. He would've gotten away with it, too, if the New Order didn't exist.


TDD's latest corporation was called The United Capsuleers of EvE. It was an atrocity.


This was no ordinary awox assignment. This was a rescue mission. The new players were spared. The sole target was the big cheese himself, CEO TDD Dominaters. But the man remained elusive, opting not to bring his own vessels out into the ore belts and ice anomalies. Still, our heroes watched and waited. Then they witnessed an outrage that even they couldn't have imagined. It came in the form of an EVEmail sent by TDD to his corporation:


It was undeniable proof that TDD intended to supplant the Code-based Order by which all highsec is governed with his own "Corporatorcracy". Worse yet, he planned to entice new players into buying "shares" in the travesty. This only came to light because Jer'ith had placed his awox alt in the corporation. Now that the New Order knew of the dastardly plot, it was time to act.

To be continued...

15 comments:

  1. BeBopAReBop RhubarbPieMay 20, 2014 at 8:54 PM

    I'm shivering in my boots. I hope the New Order wins against this menace!

    ReplyDelete
  2. That's a quick 250m scam right there.

    Either that or he is the aids of highsec.

    ReplyDelete
  3. It says right in the corp description:

    Languages Required: English

    It looks more like Klingon run through Google translate to me.

    BBB

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. post more wardec adventures pls

      Delete
  4. Some strange people living in highsec...

    ReplyDelete
  5. so whats the diference between this guy and James 315? :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Literacy. Legitimacy. Loyalty. Leadership.

      I'm out of L's.

      -EasyKill

      Delete
  6. I wish I could find humor in this, and laugh at the antics that are unfolding. Unfortunately I cannot, as I can only understand one side of this story.

    I'm pretty sure TDD decides what to type by pouring alphabet soup in his mouth and spitting it all over a whiteboard (They're remarkable! Get it? Hurr hurr hurrrrr). His messages are completely undecipherable without experiencing successive blows to the head.

    -EasyKill

    ReplyDelete
  7. This is my second favourite awox story.... I don't even need to see the end. Good Job agent and good show of patiences waiting for the right time!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I just don't understand.
    Why would TDD think leading a corporation/corporations in this way will ever do any good to anyone? Nevermind that I don't understand how he seems to believe someone with his intellectual abilities is even remotely fit to lead a corporation...

    -Fab

    ReplyDelete
  9. If "Dimplomacy" isn't already in the dictionary, it should be.

    ReplyDelete
  10. "Corporatorcracy".
    .......
    wtfidonteven

    ----Mike Adoulin

    ReplyDelete
  11. This is the kind of case that keeps you awake at night, pouring over case files and surveillance finding something that will bring that guy down.

    ReplyDelete
  12. When it comes to in game shares, there's only one way it can end.

    Badly for the issuer when they decide to take a week off and miss the all important vote. But perhaps I'm wrong and it'll be a unique story in the world of Eve Online.

    ReplyDelete

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