Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Call in the Kevlary, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Kevlary Odunen lost a 35 million isk Retriever, but he received a comprehensive EVEmail summary of the laws and regulations that govern New Order territory, where he was a resident. More than a fair trade, one would think. But Kevlary subjected the messenger, Agent Bing Bangboom, to a fusillade of profanity-laden messages. Even worse, Kevlary insulted Bing's intelligence by denying that he was a miner.

One reason why our Agents don't engage in temper tantrums: They're too focused on facts.

Carebears frequently violate the Code provision that requires them to show good sportsmanship. Not only do they neglect to drop a "gf" in local after being ganked--they don't even give our Agents props for beating them in an argument. Bing probably knew that the above exchanges weren't going to result in Kevlary saying touché.

As expected, the miner blew up at him. Highsec miners can explode even if they don't have a ship anymore.
Channel Name: Why am I dead?
Listener: Bing Bangboom
Session started: 2016.04.08 03:28:15
EVE System > Channel MOTD: Persons found in breach of the Law of Highsec will henceforth have their equipment decomissioned. This communications frequency should be utilized to discuss said punitive actions and to determine a preventative plan of action to ensure future compliance.
Though Bing won the argument (as usual), he wasn't finished. Bing isn't motivated by glory; he genuinely wants to help miners enjoy playing EVE. To do that, he'd need some assistance from his fellow Agents, who all feel the same way.
Lament von Gankenheim > invite him here
Lament von Gankenheim > Kevlary Odunen \o
Kevlary Odunen > Fuck you.
Bing met up with Agents Lament von Gankenheim and Kalorned, who were busy fielding questions in the "Why am I dead?" channel. Kevlary was invited to join. He accepted the invite, but he wasn't happy to be there.
Lament von Gankenheim > miner, im going to have to ask you to please calm down
Kevlary Odunen > I am calm.
Lament von Gankenheim > greeting other humans with an expletive is not calm.
Kevlary Odunen > Words have meaning.
Kevlary Odunen > Can't handle it....
Kevlary Odunen > You're limitations are your poblem
Basically, it was like an intervention. Kevlary didn't see that he had a problem, though. He thought everyone else had the problem.
Kalorned > What limitations do we have?
Kevlary Odunen > Apparently... words.
Lament von Gankenheim > The Code is the greatest compliation of words that EVE has ever seen
Kevlary Odunen > Code is shit
Kevlary Odunen > Fuck code
Kevlary Odunen > Code is bullshit
The source of the trouble was quickly identified: Kevlary had insufficient respect and appreciation for the Code.
Bing Bangboom > LVG, Kevlary Odunen isn't a regular miner. He has a pvp alt who is experienced in Eve.
Kalorned > Why didn't you say that up front Kevlary?
Kalorned > We took you to be a miner
Kevlary Odunen > Isn't CCP
Kevlary Odunen > Isn't Concord.
Kevlary ignored the Agents' questions and continued his rant. Kevlary didn't think the Code had any value. He should've known better: The Code was clearly more powerful than his untanked Retriever.
Kevlary Odunen > It's bullshit you made up because you can't cut it.
Lament von Gankenheim > i can see youre confused
Kevlary Odunen > I'm not confused in the least.
Kevlary Odunen > Comprehend this....
Kevlary Odunen > It's a big fucking universe.
The miner tried to impart his own philosophy to our Agents. His philosophy was an empty one. Moreover, he lacked credibility. New Order Agents are in an exalted position, standing at the very pinnacle of EVE success. Kevlary was the angry former owner of a mining barge.
Lament von Gankenheim > yes it is
Lament von Gankenheim > and in highsec
Lament von Gankenheim > you get a permit
Lament von Gankenheim > or you get rekt
Bing Bangboom > He knows that part
How much antimatter does it take to knock some sense into a miner? Our Agents were about to find out.
Lament von Gankenheim > i dont see a permit in your bio
Kevlary Odunen > There are not permits in this game.
Lament von Gankenheim > i would love to hear, move in depth about how you are not a miner
Kevlary Odunen > Well....Let me get in my NAGA..... what the fuck am I then?
Lament von Gankenheim > lying?
Kevlary had an active imagination. He could look at an AFK Retriever and see a PvP warrior. But he couldn't conceptualize a 10 million isk mining permit. A rebel miner's capacity to imagine is usually selective.
Kevlary Odunen > I'm captain of whatever fucking ship I'm in.
Lament von Gankenheim > and James 315 is the captain of whatever ship you are in, in highsec
Kevlary Odunen > Fuck James.
Lament von Gankenheim > miner, calm down
Kevlary Odunen > I am calm.
Kevlary Odunen > I'm just sick of worthless pieces of shits like you that are so retarded that you think I'm going to play this game, by rules you make up.
The miner refused to embrace the reality of highsec. He wouldn't praise--or refrain from insulting--the Saviour who had made it possible for him to experience interactive emergent content. He had three Agents helping him, but was there any hope for Kevlary?

To be continued...


  1. An intelligent new order agent? Surely you jest...the way you clowns repeatedly gank the same ships, you are as bot-aspirant and brainless as you claim the miners are...

    1. Thanks for the salt, your tears will quench our souls! ;)

    2. Also rather unimaginative as demonstrated above.

    3. Also rather unimaginative as demonstrated above.

    4. Also rather unimaginative as demonstrated above.

    5. Also rather unimaginative as demonstrated above.

    6. Also rather unimaginative as demonstrated above.

  2. Blasphemy! From the mouth of one we're trying so hard to save!

    If it weren't for BBB's masterful handling of friendly and supportive dialogue (as in 'the last time I saw you, you were the Captain of a pod'), I'd have remained mortified after reading such an outburst.

    Well done, Bing and the Lads!

    1. I loled so hard at "Captain of a pod"
      Miners make it too easy XD

    2. Last time i saw you, you were the Captain of a pod!

      I am always pleased to see an agent set some blowhard miner bot straight

      Aggrieved carebears, the pride of AG

  3. This is something to tell the grandchildren!!

  4. Can I ask dear anon posters, do you even read the articles or do you go straight to the comments section and breathlessly seek out comments by wolf to write weird homoerotic comments?!
    I'm genuinely interested to know!

    1. We come here for the delusional mind of wolfie thinking that he is still winning EVE. I wont burst his special bubble and wont tell him that hes banned from playing the game. Why would I want to break his little special bubble of warm fuzzy carebear feelings about a game he is banned from. ye ye. you are still totally winning wolfie. winning at EVE a game you are totally playing now. keep up the good work wolfie. antiganking still failing and stuff. keep up the hard work inside eve. *bubble* goes *POP*

    2. Man there are some salty carebear bitches posting on this site. Anom950, your tears are weapons grade friend! Thanks for stopping by. 10/10

    3. Only the Lord James 315 knows how many times bitteranon was ganked by loyal.

  5. Antiganking is failing so hard right now

    1. don't be mad bro because you can't login to eve anymore. I hear WoW has a new program to help the nubs get an instant high level character. Maybe you should go there?

    2. Why would he do that? All the real spergy tears are right here! Thanks for your donation btw

    3. No worries. Loyalanon has so much more time now to respond to your posts here on minerbumping now that he isn't playing EvE. His botting on these forums can reign supreme.

    4. Maybe he'll even talk to those kids of his.

  6. "The last time I saw you, you were Captain of a pod."

    Dammit BingBangBoom, taking all the best comebacks and leaving none for us.

  7. "But Christ has indeed been raised from the dead, the first fruits of those who have fallen asleep. For since death came through a man, the resurrection of the dead comes also through a man. For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive." - 1 Corinthians 15:20-22

    1. Remember Mathew 6:5 good sir. Remember also the New Order clearly walks with Jesus, and so should we all. Jesus owned a permit.

  8. Dear Loyalanon,
    I only knew you for a short time, and I was only privileged to gank on a few of your fleets. These past couple of days have not been the same without the triumphs of victory that roared over code comms, with your amazing accent. Loyal, you will truly be missed. It's a shame though that I did not get to expirience more.

  9. And in hisec
    You get a permit
    Or you get rekt

    Poetry from one of EvE's most eloquent and helpful players, and quite the looker too !!!

  10. This is why newer players to the game wont play long. These nerds who cant cut it in the other aspects of PvP get a hard-on by ganking new players... honestly it sounds extremely gay too.. "were high sec badasses" if you cunts were half the players you pretend to be in front of the new players that you bully while they try to learn the game you would step out below 0.5 where the real badasses will teach you how to play. Maybe you kids should try it eh? Take a fleet out on a roam, learn the real definition of "rekt" ��

    1. "real badasses"
      Proof or GTFO you twat. From your own experience please.
      Nothing? That's what we thought.

  11. James, can we add a new feature to the blog? I think we need a section right under the New Order treasury to give us the current status of AG. It wouldn't be too hard to update since the status would always be "Failing".

  12. But where was AG to stop these ganks?

    *looks around*

  13. Oh my!!

    Looks like many corps are dropping out of CODE. I mean the majority of them are leaving! Lack of funding from Goons? Too many multi-boxing pilots banned? Rats leaving a ship? Who knows, but it doesn't bode well for the CODE agents...good luck to all those that remain.

  14. Add standard new order agent response to anything you say. 1. Calm down miner. 2. Nice Salt. 3. Rinse and repeat while adding drivel about AG failing.

    lol the only original one in CODE was Jimmy boy. The rest of you are just drones. Enjoy your drone RP tho.

    1. Well said anon 7:10 AM. Sometimes I feel that most commentators are just CODE. monkeys with multiple personalities.. but then again, that would mean they actually have personality.

    2. Not drones, They are blind sheep =)
      The proof! http://oi68.tinypic.com/s2uqtz.jpg

    3. Lol you guys and your fluff fest. I like how fake veers feels the need to post as multiple anons, then make a point to agree with his 'witty' alter.

      Pleas never stop posting spergy shit on this blog, miners. Your butthurt, and inability to deal with said anal brusing, is what keeps this blog alive.

      And this blog is by far the most entertaining EvE blog, bar none.

      Fake Veers best Veers!!!

      Salt Lake City was very entertaining, and higblights the real cancer in New Eden, the entitled carebear.

      All the "real badasses" support what ALL gankers are doing for EvE.

      The rest of you anon botbears are better off in hisec, you will never survive past 0.5!


  15. The writing is on the wall for CHODE. and Jamey: https://www.reddit.com/r/Eve/comments/4fkvm8/8_out_of_11_corps_leave_code/

    1. Silly bear thinks that CODE. Alliance is what makes the New Order...

  16. Please! Someone tell these carebears they are being trolled! I mean i like tears as much as anyone, but this seems kinda cruel.


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