Saturday, October 8, 2016

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #116

According to Gavin Farstrider, people come to EVE for the PvE and quit when they discover they're stuck doing a bunch of unpleasant PvP. Logic like that can only mean it's time for another edition of the Highsec Miner Grab Bag!

Some anonymous carebears--particularly those who post in the comments or on Reddit--claim that they never see our Agents. They say they've spent years mining without ever being ganked. They're anonymous for a reason: their killboards would tell a different story. A story like Shane Markov's.

The New Order is extraordinarily efficient. Carebears can barely set foot in highsec before our Agents take away their expensive, unlicensed toys.

Woe to the miner who thinks he can get by without a permit.

The New Order doesn't discriminate against carebears based on their education level. Some miners are graduates of CODE University, while others got their education from the school of hard bumps.

I received an "urgent" message from James 3I5, but it turned out to be a false alarm.

James 3I5, not to be confused with James 3l5 or the other impostors out there, actually sent me a fairly low-priority message.

Carebears never stop coming up with new reasons why other people owe them money.

Miners, if you're interacting with an Agent and you don't end up sending them isk, you're doing it wrong.

How pervasive is the CODE. alliance's influence on EVE? Consider this exchange...

Even when a non-CODE. member kills someone in lowsec, CODE. is blamed. At the rate things are going, one day 100% of EVE-related thoughts will be somehow connected to the New Order.

More evidence: J Conway was reminded why he quit playing EVE. Was he ganked? No. He simply saw someone write "CODE" in local chat, and that was enough to make him want to leave the game. What a bigot!

But fear not. Most highsec dwellers are being won over. Our Agents are the most prominent celebrities in the game right now. Can anyone doubt highsec belongs to us--and that we are living in the age of the New Order?


  1. the tears from these antiganking recruits is glorious!

    1. wolf calm down. we know code will win.
      manic miner account tons know this, why we support the interactive game james 315 wants in the mmo game.

  2. That last carebear was correct, gankers are the friendliest people in the game. They try to help everyone, but some are beyond help, doomed to spend their days as lonely bot-aspirant bait in a spaceship shooting pvp mmo.

    Sadly they will not learn. WILL not learn.
    Why does ag continue try to defend willfully ignorant carebears? What manner of insanity is this?

    Why is ag trying to kill EVE?

    1. The guy still sits in our public channel where we bring people to for a conversation after to this day. You will possibly see him in his own catalyst soon. :)

  3. Wolfs dick cancer a story for the kids and grandkids for sure!

    1. What is it with highsec minerfags and cancer?

    2. What is it with Ben Li's salt

    3. What is it with ag carebears blaming everything on the wrong people?....

      They really are that ignorant. It took me a while to realize it, but they are all scared, especially the hsm idiots, thats why i joined the Pandemic Horde anti ganking militia.

      PHag for lyfe!

      The rest of you hisec ag idiots need to man up and join a group, you useless hisec shitters.

      I'm Kip Winger, premier Highsec Online Moderator and Operator for the Pandemic Horde anti ganking militia. We won't stop untill highsec is completely safe and trigger free for all bots. Fuck CCP and their "pvpmmo" game! We want safety!

  4. Mehrunes Jinglebells has a 5% efficiency rating with most of his (avoidable) losses being outside of highsec.
    He has a bad habit of lingering on gates in vulnerable blockade runners. No surprise, he's in CO2.

  5. Congratulations to all the highsec minerbots featured today, and welcome to your honorary induction into the Pandemic Horde anti ganking militia. You have all shown the qualities found in true PHags.

    And don't forget to see me, Kip Winger, for free buttcream and ice packs, looks like you guys can use them.

    As PHag's premier Highsec Online Moderator and Operator I would also like to invite everyone to attend the next Highsec Online Moderator and Operator training confrence. I know you will all make great H.O.M.O.'s!

    Remember to vote for me, Kip Winger, for Highsec CSM!
    Help make highsec great again, elect another PHag H.O.M.O. to CSM!


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