It was a particularly bad week to be a bot-aspirant in highsec. Our Agents were out in force.
The mighty CODE. alliance dominated the killboards. For a time, nearly all of the high-value kills in the entire galaxy were made by CODE. Look at all of those lovely CODE. alliance logos. Mine is literally the face of elite PvP. Many carebears were punished for their decadence during the week of October 16th @ 00:00 EVEtime through October 22nd @ 23:59 EVEtime.
Let's start with three doses of absurdity. Valkyrie Hellscythe piloted an outrageous Noctis worth over 900 million isk; it was promptly blapped by Agent Ralliana. The second dose of absurdity is the reason why this Noctis was worth so much:
Yes, for some reason Valkyrie saw fit to include four ORE Strip Miners in her Noctis' cargo. I think we all know how our Agents feel about ORE Strip Miners. And as for the third dose? Valkyrie lost another 900 million isk Noctis to a different Agent 21 minutes later. It, too, was carrying four ORE Strip Miners.
And, my friends, the week only gets crazier from here.
lab guru lived up to her name. Her Bustard was carrying a lab's worth of blueprints. It wasn't long before Agents Xunasy, Australian Excellence, Tax Collector Emile, Imastupid fc, and Lul GitGud Kid had her in their sights.
lab guru's ship dropped 6.8 billion isk worth of blueprint originals. You can be sure they're being put to better use now.
We know there's such a thing as an anti-tank fit, in which a ship's cargo mods lower the ship's hitpoints. When I look at SniperWolf90's 1.4 billion isk Mackinaw, I see an isk anti-tank. That is, his blingy shield mods (to say nothing of the blingy yield mods) are worth so much isk that they do more to attract incoming fire than to tank it. Agents Shadow Cyrilus, Lichelle Marie, Mildron Klinker, and Salah ad-Din al-Jawahiri must have salivated when they scanned the Mackinaw. Or perhaps they simply saw a non-compliant Mackinaw and destroyed it without needing to scan it first. Either way, they also destroyed SniperWolf90's billion isk pod.
Last week, everyone's favorite Anti-Ganker Crazy'Ivan managed to lose a 3.3 billion isk faction battleship. He's probably used to losing expensive stuff by now, but...
Crazy'Ivan was ganked by Agent-aspirant Yulai Crus Cerebi. This NPC displayed more humanity than most of the highsec miners we encounter.
Verdith'Tanath packed up his Anshar and set his autopilot for Jita. With a triple-anti-tanked jump freighter and 52.7 billion isk at stake, he saw no reason not to go AFK. Then he stumbled upon a fleet full of reasons: Agents Synamic, Sinister Minister, Archibald Fizzleblade, Unfit ForDoody, SynthiaGreey, Samsa, Baukert Schietschip, Jack Fizzleblade, Kyalla Ahashion, Rick Nederlander, Hermann Fizzleblade, Alexis Grixis, Whitney Wooberg, Jasper Esper, Asha Vantthellere, Arobaz, Heck Heckington, Yuliana Tang, Lawrence Lawton, Another ShadeOf Whyte, Franz Fizzleblade, Shazna Solta, Mack Poddington, Grant Bant, Law Abiding Citizen, Tim Simsalabim, 4R084Z, James Poddington, Hagen Fizzleblade, Liz Cadelanne, Urziel TheGunner, Auroroa Lowe, Groenteboer, Sigmund Jund, Amanantian, Beep Meep Beep, and Justinian Ganglious.
Incidentally, the Anshar had plenty of jump fuel. It was only missing a pilot. A mining permit wouldn't have hurt, either.
Yikes. oriental jew lost one of the most expensive pods we've recorded on MinerBumping. Agent Winnie Po0h had the pleasure of devouring 7.7 billion isk worth of implants. This came immediately after oriental jew lost his 8.9 billion isk Bowhead.
In case you were curious, this is what a 7.7 billion isk pod looks like. Can anyone doubt that highsec needs us?