Friday, June 30, 2017

Kruisin' for a Bruisin'


When miners like Bael Vulpes lose a fail-fit mining ship, they're generally sent an informative EVEmail. But they get more than an EVEmail: They get a choice.


Bael chose not to buy a permit and embark on an exciting journey of Code compliance. His ego was too big for that. And that meant the miner was setting himself up for another fall.


Agent Unconsentual Friend again extended the miner an invitation to a better life. Would Bael accept the gracious invitation, or would he make an even bigger fool of himself?


Ah, poor miner. Though highsec Retriever pilots should show humility, Bael felt compelled to puff himself up. He spun a story about somehow profiting a billion isk from an alleged CODE. heist. It's not clear exactly how Bael was supposed to have made money off of the theft, but it had something to do with CODE. "front companies" buying stuff from him.


Bael's humiliation came swiftly. Several months after the Ruse Kruise, highsec miners are still falling for it. One can only imagine how the world-beating Retriever pilot must've felt in this moment. Time for Bael to give up the act.


Miners are good at digging themselves into a hole. Bael denied that the Ruse Kruise was a prank, insisting that "market guys" had made money off of the theft. Presumably Bael was one of those market guys. A minute later, however, Bael reconsidered and sent another EVEmail:


Doubts were beginning to creep into Bael's mind. He was no longer sure exactly what had happened, but he still believed that he'd somehow been hooked up with cheap ships that he re-sold to CODE. front companies at an outrageous profit.


Bael's story was a little vague and growing fuzzier by the minute, so Agent Unconsentual requested clarification.


The miner concluded the exchange by changing the subject, referring to some kind of CODE. "rebranding". Sadly, Bael wasn't in the mood to elaborate any further.


The Ruse Kruise is the gift that keeps on giving. Even as recently as this week, people are still passing the story around.


This phenomenon can only be partly explained by the silliness and gullibility of Goofuses who still yearn for a victory against the New Order. The other part of the equation is the extraordinary relevance of the mighty CODE. alliance. We're what's happening in EVE, so we're what EVE players talk about. A word of caution, though: If you want to speak about EVE without looking foolish, remember that the CODE always wins. Always!

40 comments:

  1. CHODE. = GOONS

    Failing daily, and Jamey is lying to cover his failures.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wrong on every point. It's spelled CODE.; His name is James 315; The Code Always Wins, and you're afraid of us.

      Delete
    2. Maybe The Savior will gank my beautiful virgin vessel

      Delete
    3. James is unable to win the law prevents his victory.

      Delete
  2. It's amazing the positions these Goofuses contort themselves into simply to avoid paying 10m ISK. Get a permit today--it's easier.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. James developed a great business plan with good execution. Perhaps borrowing some from historic wars, although when hunting or fishing, one still is required to purchase a permit to be legal.

      Delete
    2. I get my permit from CCP every month, no need to pay these clowns.

      Delete
    3. Does CODE. issue special permits for alpha clones? Are there social programs in place to help the 'less fortunate' pilots?

      I only ask because I know a certain alpha that needs a permit but can't seem to afford one.

      Delete
    4. Permits are on sale right now for the low low price of only 10m ISK for a year. If you can't afford that, you're not trying! What a deal.

      Delete
    5. Bomb, scalp, skin and dry.

      Delete
    6. Bomb, scalp, skin and dry.
      I'm not that kind of Doctor. Seek out a dermatologist! XD

      Delete
    7. You're not a doctor at all. Other wise it would be Dr. Lawrence Lawton.
      The bomb, bomb, bomb is the destruction of your factory, scalping, skinning and drying is to make you into a foot stool for my office in nullsec.

      Delete
    8. Sounds like you need to ask your doctor for some butthurt cream, anon! Your puny threats mean nothing to The Code.

      Delete
    9. I'm not talking about code, I'm directing this discussion at you professor.

      Delete
    10. I am one with The Code. Send me an evemail if you dare and we'll soon find out what stuff you're made of.

      Delete
    11. So it is written, so shall it be done.

      Delete
    12. OK so, no ghetto permits. I know an alpha that's not gonna be happy.

      Delete
    13. Hi, Anon 1209. In medicine, you become 'Dr' first, of course. Later, if you fulfil certain criteria, you become 'Prof'. The latter doesn't cancel out the former, but represents an agreed-upon enhancement of status.

      Not every doctor becomes a professor; but every professor must at one time have been a doctor.

      Delete
    14. IM sorry Lawton but you have yet to purchase a comment permit and are still seen as a criminal and an uneducated monkey. You can be purged of all these sinful issues by simply buying the appropriate permit.

      Your better,
      Troll.

      Delete
    15. For the record, there has been no evemail from anon140.

      Delete
    16. I don't think he plays TBH

      Delete
    17. Maybe that person does play and is more intelligent than the Professor?

      Delete
  3. hahahahahahaha people will believe anything.

    Antigankers are truly failing right now \0\ 0/0/ \0/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wolf, failure is good :)

      Delete
    2. "failure is good"

      That explains a lot.

      Delete
    3. Wolf is still learning that the courts look down on child abuse. She unfortunately has lost visitation rights to her children while she awaits trial.

      Delete
  4. I check this site daily cuz it's the best EVE related comedy on the intertubes...well done!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Agreed, this is the premier site for salty tears and silly carebear shenanigans.

      Even the comments are chock full of idiots crying about nazis and extortion. And just when you think you've seen it all, along comes a lost goon alt and he fluffs an alpha leech.

      Best EVE site evah!

      Delete
    2. Yeah it gets even funny when it gets nerfed because code monkeys cant take PvP comments.

      Delete
  5. I still have a permit but wow that CODE is dead, can I go back and mine without permit?

    Anyone interested in buying a second-hand mining permit for 5M ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you have the balls you can contact the Agent you purchased the permit from and ask them. If you have the balls...

      Delete
    2. But code needs permits now in order to cry on their own blog.

      Delete
  6. Carebears are too stingy to pay 10m isk, they get FURIOUS about losing a 30m isk Retriever, yet they can't remember petty things like whether or not they made 1.1b isk in the most awesome heist ever.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Code is still upset that miners get paid decent money for mining, they cry and rage over how they just enjoy the game. Code then makes a blog to cry on and get upset when people tell em to grow up.

      Delete
  7. How did that reddit shitter not get flamed?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Lol carebears and their tall tales. Every other one is either the alt of a powerful null pilot, or a market mogul that has too much ISK to spend.

    And they will try very hard to make us believe this AFTER they get ganked in a hisec belt scrabbling for shit ore like street urchins.

    Anyone pve'ing in hisec is too scared to play EVE.

    and, the 1.1b ISK that shitter was bragging about making...HA! I spend that much each month on Quafe and sex slaves. ahahahahah I love to hear poors brag about making pennies ;)

    I am still loling about the "Code front companies", that guy has to be ag.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm still laughing at code and how they still think they matter.

      Delete
  9. Reeks of bias is strong in this blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *The reek of

      ftfy. English is hard?

      Delete
    2. Yeah James doesn't do reality too well, his fuck boys don't either.

      Delete

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