Monday, May 21, 2018

Bob Wins, Part 4

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent Bob the Fourth saw extraordinary success in selling permits, even when miners didn't intend to spend quite as much isk as they ended up doing. Nevertheless, even a licensed miner merits monitoring.


The shift toward miners using Orcas with named drones has had some unanticipated consequences. Unanticipated for the miners, that is. Our Agents are capable of stealing the drones and then making a nice bit of isk by selling them.


New Order Agents also receive something else in the bargain--intel. By recording the identities of miners who purchase the drones, our Agents can track them down and steal or destroy those very same drones. The cycle of justice continues.
Bob the Fourth > gf miner.
Bob the Fourth > mining permits, just 10 Million ISK.
Ryhos Gunerre > I thought that was a Code thing
Bob the Fourth > Indeed it is, I enforce the Code and you should follow it.
Agent Bob sold stolen 'Augmented' Mining Drones to Barabbas xxx, and then smartbombed them to death. This act of elite PvP caught the attention of others in local.
Ryhos Gunerre > I'll pass
Bob the Fourth > So did Barabbas xxx. It just cost him his Augmented Drones.
Ryhos Gunerre > Still gonna pass
Barabbas xxx > everythings replaceable
Barabbas xxx > well, not gold magnates but generally
Barabbas was lucky in one thing, at least: He'd been at his keyboard at the time. Otherwise, Bob would've bumped the Orca away and stolen the drones--and maybe sold them to Barabbas again.
Ryhos Gunerre > Bob its to bad. I docked up in my hulk. I think i am going to call it a day. Also the Ice Miners from Niballe let me know to avoid you whenmining
Bob the Fourth > Don't worry, I know all about your Hulk.
Ryhos Gunerre > ;)
Ryhos Gunerre > Good because i'm heading out
Bob's reputation for power and excellence spread further. This had a funny side effect.


Barabbas had some interest in doing things other than mining. EVE has a steep learning curve, so the miner sought advice from someone good at EVE. Who better than an Agent of the New Order?


In fact, this is a common phenomenon. The "victims" of Code enforcement often seek out Agents for help. We're the only ones who truly care about the fate of highsec carebears, after all.


And, I mean, it's not like you can get useful advice from a member of Anti-Ganking.


Over time, Barabbas found himself wondering why so many people hate the mighty CODE. alliance. I've written an 11-part series on the subject, but the short version is that people who hate CODE. are bad and dumb. Initially, Barabbas took it for granted that CODE. should be hated, but when he cracked open his mind a little, truth started to seep in.


One day, Bob found an extra 10 million isk in his wallet. Had the day finally arrived?
Barabbas xxx > hello, how are you?
Bob the Fourth > I'm very well thanks. Is that 10 Million you buying a permit?
Barabbas xxx > no not for me. there were some new guys mining in ventures in my fleet earlier. but there have gone now. i just wanted them to have a good time :)
Barabbas xxx > buy some plasmas or a cruiser with it!!
The miner saw the wisdom in giving Bob money, but was not quite ready to purchase a permit.


Still, he was getting there. Slowly, but surely.


Even so, we mustn't sugarcoat anything less than total compliance. As this kill from someone else's wardec demonstrates, only 100% Code-compliance is worthy of highsec.

To be continued...

11 comments:

  1. Oh my! Can't tell the last time I was so excited about how a series will continue! Such a magnificent and strong test of a promising but ultimately doubtful miner.

    I'm full of hope that our miners are slowly reforming. Barabbas xxx will see how the wisdom of the Code, it's agents and the loss of his orca dwarfs all the teachings he received in EvE Uni.

    Praise James! \o/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I also hope these miners will see the light, but I must ask myself why the miner was mining in highsec in the first place.

      The only reason I see is that the miner is a natural born carebear. Only a natural born carebear can be so risk adverse that it mines in highsec, and any carebear who's first instinct is to mine in highsec cannot possibly be converted with a few kind words and a pat on the back.

      He's mining in highsec because he's scared to leave the perceived "safety" of highsec. That's cowardice, and there's no place for cowards in EVE.

      Even if you can look past the cowardice, he's still mining instead of PVPing. In a PVP game. Again, there's no place for cowards here.

      You cannot save highsec carebears without specialized deprograming. They are wired wrong and the only way to correct that is to break them down and completely remove any of the carebear traits. Only then can you be assured that the carebear is truly adherent and not just trying to hide behind a permit. Like a coward.

      If you want to fix them, first you must break them. That's why gankers attack pedojedus so vehemently, they're trying to save him from himself, to correct his criminal ways. To make him a better person in the hopes he can be reached before he goes full shardani.

      Because gankers care.


      Always!

      Delete
  2. "And, I mean, it's not like you can get useful advice from a member of Anti-Ganking."

    ReplyDelete
  3. Meh seems made up

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ignoanon too simple to post anything but "mehseemsmadeup".

    Filthy animal

    ReplyDelete
  5. Jesus loves you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And he mows my lawn.

      Delete
    2. That was funny. Good job.

      Delete
    3. Your false god is dead.

      Delete

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