Monday, September 30, 2019

The Point


When a miner loses a mining ship, sometimes he'll rage. On other occasions, a miner may be more philosophical about the loss.


Sadly, one of the more common philosophies among miners is nihilism.


Despite being a newcomer, Kunari Yeva somehow knew to respond to the gank by voicing concerns about EVE's player retention rates. But Agent Aiko Danuja was prepared. She anticipated Kunari's reaction--and set a trap for him.


Less than 60 seconds after the miner invoked EVE's subscription numbers, Agent Aiko had him in checkmate. Kunari was stunned.

All of you new Agents out there, I hope you're taking notes.


After Kunari collected himself, he spoke up--only to be outmaneuvered once again. Things were not going well for Kunari.


For the first time, the miner considered the consequences of the Code's permit requirement. Was it feasible for him to collect 10 million isk?


The miner had been podded back to where he came from. His prospects looked bleak. Yet Aiko was hopeful.


Without realizing it, Kunari laid out a case in favor of ganking miners in rookie systems.


CCP claims that they plan to overhaul the new player experience again. I can only hope that the next version of the tutorial is better tailored to life in modern highsec.


It seemed as though every time Kunari opened his mouth, he stepped on another landmine.


As it is written, "Although profit is a primary motive of my new business, I strongly believe that corporations should also seek to make a positive contribution to the community. I would like to think that I 'do well by doing good.'"


Kunari struggled to absorb the lessons that our Agent taught him that day. Two things he learned, though:

1. You can't beat an Agent in spaceship combat.
2. You can't beat an Agent in debate.

Better get a permit.

16 comments:

  1. Jamey's running out of content, it's getting obvious with all these "new alts" just to write a story to keep the blog post streak up.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You should write a post about it on the hisec militia blog that no one reads.

      Delete
    2. - James writes a post practically every day for several years now
      - Millions of views show people enjoy the content
      - Billions of ISK worth of ships are destroyed all the time, corps are awoxed, carebears brought to justice, ...
      - You yourself visit this blog every day
      - You engage with the content, write comments, etc.
      "Jamey's running out of content"

      Delete
    3. This page gets like three thousand views per day.

      Delete
  2. Minerbumping.com: On a blog post streak since 2012!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Habitual mining offense! Princess Aiko foreshadows a time when we won't have to deal with the usual tough criminals we see on this blog, just a few misguided youngsters, casually sniffing veldspar here and there in Ventures.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Princess Aiko is so dreamy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Princess Aiko DESTROYS born-again CAREBEAR with airtight logic!

      Delete
    2. an old guard supporter like the dark priestess Aiko, rising high in popularity like that, makes me worrying about our future.

      Delete
  5. "I don't know where miners go when they die"

    I've got a pretty dammed good idea, and they deserve it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Princess Aiko is my favourite agent by far.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Okay. This is just disgusting. This site is a god damned space cult, which is not a problem by itself, but the probelm is that you ruin the game for the people who want to play it a different way. There is NOTHING wrong with botting. There is NOTHING wrong with hi-sec AFK mining. Humans are weak and stupid, your thrill of PvP doesn't make nearly as much profit as botting does. The argument for lo-sec is valid, but that requires the player to not be AFK sometimes, which defeats the point. Human interaction is boring. I want to gather and provide, while making a profit. CONCORD should be made to arrive instantly, so that you filthy gankers all die, and not accomplish your goal. Bumping is fine, but you can't bump everyone. If you have a powerful enough computer, you can make more bots than the agents can manage to bump. Your efforts are futile. You won't stop us. You are just miserable, because you seek human interaction in an MMO, instead of getting human interaction IRL. This organisation is sad, and weak.

    ReplyDelete

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