Monday, October 21, 2013

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #44

No refunds. Welcome to the forty-fourth edition of the Highsec Miner Grab Bag!

Second Hand picked a bad time to give me the ol' Miner Bingo saw of "if you're bumping me, you're not bumping anyone else". But it occurred to me that as long as she's spouting nonsense to me, she's not spouting nonsense to any of my Agents. So I continued to bump, for their sake.

Piligrim Russ shed the most enigmatic tears after Guybertini ganked him. Somewhere in the rage was a genuine concern for Guybertini's health, though.

Let's be honest. If you're a highsec miner, you probably have a lot of free time on your hands, and you're not very discriminating in how you choose to spend it. So you may as well take the necessary time to comply with local Agents' requests.

Joppa Ikkala gave me a sarcastic compliment about how I run my "guild". Contrary to Joppa's expectations, forwarding me Guybertini's form EVEmail gave me warm fuzzies. I'm so proud of my guild.

Kinao D'Horid didn't quite make it to ninety-five theses, but he sent me a fairly long list of complaints about the New Order. I'll treat it as a lightning round and quickly address his concerns:

1. You can send me isk any time.
3. Bump fellow miners for isk.
3.(?) See above.
4. All must obey the Code.
5. Sorry for your loss.
6. What? The New Order is the most fun thing in highsec!

It's as true in EVE as it is anywhere else on the internet: If someone claims they're blocking you, they're not blocking you. People who actually block you tend to block you rather than talk to you.

The only thing less intimidating than "powerful friends in nullsec" is powerful friends in highsec. All the powerful friends you can make in highsec belong to the New Order anyway.

In a stunning turn of events, rebels SPIONKOP and John Cadenza accused the New Order of being populated by bots. Not so. The New Order is the finest collection of humans in highsec. And if we did let bots join our ranks, they would be human-aspirants, like Data from Star Trek.

Putting the rumors to rest, I have never appeared on the cover of "Crack Whore Magazine". However, I was Time magazine's Person of the Year in 2006!

Gradious Minayin wants me to change how he feels. Easy enough. Buck up, kiddo. Also, you can send me 10 million isk.

As anyone will tell you, the New Order is the best thing ever to happen to miners of highsec. If you want to learn why, there are several hundred posts on MinerBumping for you to read, for a start. If you have any questions after that, I'll be happy to answer them.


  1. Just reread Time's 2006 person of the year article (after first reading in early 2007). Indeed, James 315 was person of the year then! Notice also in this grab bag how honourable agent Seraphina Bibbs handles an unruly miner.

  2. I am also happy to report that Gradious Minayin has purchased his permit and is now Code compliant.

    Some miners are smart enough to get their permit instead of getting ganked.


  3. "It's kind of a long story"

    Gave me a chuckle.

    1. If you have a spare hour, go to the links page and check out (under Other Relevant Links):

      Manifesto II

      It kind of is a long story and very enlightening. There's a lot of sense in there, mixed in with some of the best role play in an MMO ever.

  4. It's amusing, during an expedition this weekend to look at the state of Amarr space I found most miners to be running tanked fits and responding in local but still no permits. And they say that the New Order has had no effect on miners.

  5. Krominal and his bumping alt Kalorned and fellow ganking alt Keraina Talie-Kuo are decidedly under-represented on Minerbumping.

    Just check the Gamis Kill-board here:

    Kalorned has been tirelessly enforcing the code in Gamis (at least for 4 hour stretches) -for at least the last two months. Meanwhile Krominal's activity levels have been so high his sec rating is -9.8.

    Kalorned also offers miners a very fair, reasonable and specially priced deal: Instead of paying the $10m isk, invest the $10m isk in Catalyst, Thrasher or Cormorants and gank a multi-boxing bastard. Do this and your permit is as good as paid.

    The kill mail looks nice too and it is indelible proof that the miner's dues to the Code have been paid.

    1. Wow. I love that. I will offer the option to buy and use a catalyst on a fellow miner as a possibility to everybody I offer permits. I would bet good money that most of the miners will agree its the most fun you can have for 10m isk.

    2. Well after Kalorned spent maybe 30 minutes chasing me around bookmarked asteroids in Gamis he gave up and I went back to mining ice.

      I was the only guy there and the field was brand new. There was over a PLEX worth of ice in the field of maybe 25 asteroids.

      Then out comes this A-hole in a fleet of multiboxed Mackinaws. Of all the asteroids he could have gone to he just warps on top of mine.

      Screw that - time to gank someone worthy of being ganked I think.

      So I mailed Kalorned to see if I couldn't put $10m isk to better use in a cormorant guns so we could get one of the Macks.

      Turns out they were tanked to all hell and that day I moved to Curse and haven't mined ice since.

    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

    4. A permit in exchange for killmails? What is this cleverness on minerbumping?

      There might be hope for it, yet. Instead of coercing miners to pay you to look the other way, have them actually go out and do something other than mining.. That idea could well lead to the highsec revolution that has been so long overdue.

      (Wish there were a way to edit posts AFTER you post them.. Damned typos)

    5. The really sneaky part was it came at the suggestion of a miner....

  6. The bit about advertising in-system prior to ganks is a valid point. As much as you'd like to believe it, your site here isn't exactly the first result in every google search. Giving them the chance to show that they're not bots etc before paffing them would be pretty cool.

    That said, this edition's examples are pretty amusing. I like the one with sports.. his Russian makes about as much sense as his English. Prime example of the idiocy that pervades highsec on all fronts.


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