Thursday, October 3, 2013
The Hard Sell, Part 1
Victory! Nearly a dozen Agents, including three Brutixes, succeeded in destroying Avacyn Eternal's fail-fit Orca in a 0.7 security system. Six hundred million in contraband down the drain. Avacyn might have thought our Agents would be fooled by the shield mods, but all good miners know that a proper Orca doesn't fit any cargo expansion mods. All available slots must be used for tank.
Avacyn had been using mining drones to scrape up minerals from the asteroids. It takes a long time to fill up an Orca that way, so naturally she was AFK. Twenty-five minutes later, she realized what happened to her, and she convoed Agent MotherSammy for guidance.
Avacyn was indignant that nobody warned her about the New Order's control of highsec. Dude, have you even read MinerBumping in the last year? We haven't done this in secret.
Killmails and killboards value equipment based on market value. Miners value things differently. If they're pretending they don't mind the loss, they'll downplay it. If they think reimbursement is still possible, or if they just want to shop around a sob story, they'll give an inflated estimate. Avacyn's tears included a ⅓ mark-up.
Avacyn was flat broke. Or so she would have us believe. If true, she must have bought the Orca with all of her money, immediately before getting blown up.
Incredibly, Avacyn claimed to have only half a million isk in her wallet. Not nearly enough to buy a mining permit.
Before the New Order transforms them into better people, carebears are only capable of a few things. Mining, whining, and lying are among them. MotherSammy and her fellow Agents used antimatter to stop Avacyn from mining, but the whining and lying continued. Either that, or Avacyn genuinely believed you can't make 10 million isk unless you mine with an Orca. Since Orcas cost hundreds of millions of isk, that presents quite a chicken/egg problem.
A lot of down-on-their-luck miners these days have been saying that they would have paid, if only they had been asked. They only say this after being killed, though. When we ask miners to pay before we kill them, they often refuse.
In any case, every miner who enters highsec is deemed to have been asked to pay, and is deemed to have agreed to pay. In other words, every miner without a permit is in debt for at least 10 million isk. It's impolite to make extravagant purchases when you're in debt to your friends. Pay us back first, and then you can treat yourself to that Orca you've had your eye on.
In the beginning, I did anchor secure containers near ice fields to notify the miners of their need to pay. But we live in the age of MinerBumping. This blog serves as an anchored container for all the world. Avacyn claimed to be too new to know any better. She's been playing EVE for about 20 weeks. She may have a point, though: There's not much you can learn about EVE in 20 weeks of AFK mining.
As always, our friendly Agent offered a shoulder for the carebear to cry on. Avacyn was distraught. Could MotherSammy convince her not to quit the game? And more importantly, could she convince Avacyn to fork over the 10 million isk she owed?
To be continued...