Thursday, October 17, 2013

The Red Pen Express

Some miners just can't help but make trouble. Case in point: StarSceeam.

Agent Nerfbat Aldent of the illustrious Barge Cleaning Services corp promised to keep an eye on StarSceeam. Previously, the miner had earned himself a spot on the Red Pen list for various crimes against the New Order.

If you need your memory refreshed, StarSceeam's the guy who paid 10 million for a permit and then inexplicably suicided his Raven while trying (and failing) to gank an Agent's industrial ship.

Agent Killigrew Boirelle witnessed StarSceeam's Mackinaw stealing everything that wasn't nailed down in one of my asteroid belts. He activated the kill right, which had been shared with the corp. Like any good citizen, Killigrew activated his warp disruptor and kept the Mackinaw pinned down until Nerfbat's Catalyst could arrive and share in the kill.

From his previous experience with the New Order, StarSceeam had learned the importance of putting at least some tank on his ship. Sadly, the Mackinaw was still fail-fit. And when kill rights are involved, it's really best to just get a mining permit. They work wonders.

StarSceeam has only been in EVE for a little over 4 years, so he was amazed to hear about the concept of kill rights.

The destruction of the illegal Mackinaw was a great way for the Barge Cleaning Services corp to break the ice with the locals. They wanted everyone to hear about the Code, not just StarSceeam.

But even in the distant Verge Vendor region, there were already some who owned permits. StarSceeam soured the mood in local by uttering more Red Pen-worthy death threats.

Defiance is a typical trait of the Red Pen offender. In the end, resistance is meaningless. It simply makes a miner take longer to get the benefits of New Order membership.

StarSceeam suddenly remembered that he had paid 10 million isk for a permit, right before his ill-fated suicide attack. I don't know what's up with miners these days sending us money and immediately violating the Code. Very strange.

...and his bio wasn't exactly written in the spirit of compliance, either.

Nerfbat invited StarSceeam to undock and engage in another battle. Fresh off of his Mackinaw loss, StarSceeam was still steaming. He was ready to go. He undocked in a Cyclone.

But StarSceeam didn't understand that the kill right activation lasts for 15 minutes. This presented Klaxor Gaterau, a random local with a Megathron, the chance to join in the fight. He found himself enjoying Code enforcement, and another of StarSceeam's fail-fit ships bit the dust.

This time, Killigrew was quick on the trigger and tackled StarSceeam's pod before it could get away. Killigrew kept it tackled and let Nerfbat Aldent have the honour of sending StarSceeam instantly out of the system on the Red Pen express. It's an expensive ride. It cost StarSceeam 644 million isk, but you can't beat the service!


  1. Professional New Order agents cleaning high-sec!

    All hail the new order!

    1. With his fail-fits is more like an act of mercy.

  2. That was AWESOME !! Talk about perfectly played. Well done fellow Knights.

    - Guybertini

  3. Stories were carebears lose their minds and get expensive failfit combat ships blown up are my favorite.

  4. Damn, enforcing the Code in a Megathron. That is awesome! Well done everyone.

    When did killrights become shady?

    1. On the forums today I learned that allies joining a wardec'd corp is "griefing" the wardecer. Its a brave new world of Carebear I guess.

    2. Citation needed. :)


      Carebear calling corps joining a wardecced corp griefing

  5. Didn't want those implants anyway...

  6. LOL well done, Barge Cleaning Services! For great justice!

  7. I did not see that podkill coming. Perfect way to finish out a minerbumping post.

  8. anyone whos watched transformers knows that starscream is a big screw-up.
    at least hes rping true to the character :)

  9. A permit is far cheaper...

    Excellent work guys!

    1. But for some people Code compliance is too costly - despite making the game much more enjoyable.

  10. What a dumbfuck
    Most likely bought his toon

  11. FFS Jimmy, PLEASE write a story that isn't rehashed garbage. Over and over again it's the same lame ass content with you. So and so bought shares like a moron because all that isk is just going to your wallet. So and so tried to rebel and is dumb and died. Random miner # 3,671 didn't buy a permit and got wrecked. Blah, blah, blah. It's old news. And it's boring to read. Seriously.

    High Sec is never going to belong to you if all you operate in is about half a dozen system in Caldari space.. Sure you have a random Agent here and there but you aren't cleaning up High Sec. You're just that creepy janitor that stands there mopping the same spot on the floor while staring at all the pretty women passing you by. Come on man, sack up and actually push the things you say you stand for..

    1. Excuse me sir, your jimmies seem a bit rustled.

    2. I Also Read Blogs I DislikeOctober 19, 2013 at 5:39 AM

      If you don't like the content he makes maybe stop reading it? Hell, you could even go out and make your own content instead...

    3. Hey, he's just reporting on what the carebears do. It's not his fault they repeat their stupid mistakes over and over and over again.

      Funnily enough, they would do a lot better if they communicated and worked together. But no, too much effort and you have to be not afk.

  12. StarSceeam is a like a virtual punching bag - a glutton for punishment.

  13. *read killmail* Lol, Megatron killed Starscream.

    That's what he should have done in the first EPISODE of the TV show, to save himself the hassle later on.

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