Monday, January 19, 2015

How to Build a Successful Highsec Corp, Part 4

Previously, on MinerBumping... The CEO of Lunar Eclipse LLC, gimilli, got into a heated argument with New Order diplomat Agent Capt Starfox. One of the Lunar Eclipse LLC miners who had paid for a permit chose to violate the Code with a max-yield, no-tank barge, and was ganked for it. But gimilli blamed the New Order instead!


gimilli's faith in the Code was rapidly disappearing. Now all of his built-up resentments and questions about the Code came pouring out. The "no excessive mining" clause, for instance. Despite mining 2-3 hours every day, he considered himself innocent.


Nor did gimilli understand the rule against flying untanked mining barges. Enforcing that rule constitutes "picking on the weak", according to gimilli, because an untanked ship is a weak ship. Carebears love to hide; they'll even hide behind logical paradoxes.


Capt Starfox appealed to gimilli's better nature--if the miner had one. Our Agent encouraged him to be gallant, but the miner couldn't see past his desire for maximum yield.


Nevertheless, the miner at least had the presence of mind to realize that he was losing his mind.


Unfortunately, that loss of mind made it increasingly difficult for gimilli to articulate his thoughts.


If one's view of the world is sufficiently distorted, everything is seen in reverse. This is what happens to bot-aspirants. gimilli believed "the Code fails", even though anyone with eyes can see that the Code always wins.


With gimilli in open rebellion against the New Order and its Code, Capt Starfox had no choice but to revoke the corp's mining permits. Since members of Lunar Eclipse LLC intended to continue mining illegally, CODE. declared war war against them.


The declaration of war made peace talks even more tense.


No matter what life throws at us, the New Order always stands together. Highsec miners, on the other hand, scatter like cockroaches at the first sign of difficulty.


It didn't help that gimilli wasn't exactly an inspiring leader. He repeatedly called his corp members "the weak". Churchill he ain't.


Throughout everything, Capt Starfox remained the consummate professional. He told gimilli precisely what he was doing wrong and explained why Lunar Eclipse LLC was on its way to disaster. Starfox was probably the best friend gimilli ever had in this game--and yet our critics call us "griefers". More like "befrienders".


Even as the conversation continued, gimilli's corp was already losing members. If gimilli didn't change his tune in a hurry, he wouldn't have anything left.


But gimilli doubled down on his new anti-Order stance. He declared war against Tactical Narcotics Team, Starfox's corp.


gimilli then convo'ed Starfox to demand a billion isk. Carebears, don't bluff. You're no good at it.

Bonus! Thought experiment: If gimilli had managed to get his hands on a billion isk this way, do you think he would have...

A) Shared it with his corp by reimbursing their losses from the awox attack.
B) Kept it all for himself, buying a PLEX to put in his shuttle.
C) Kept it all for himself, buying a PLEX to put in his untanked Retriever.


Two days later, gimilli's corp had to withdraw the wardec...


...because gimilli's corp had no members left. It was another magnificent victory for the New Order. It's true what they say: The Code always wins. What makes the New Order extra special is that we're willing to share the fruits of our victory with the very people who would be our enemies. gimilli's corp could have remained Code-compliant and enjoyed all the benefits of New Order citizenship. Instead, they self-destructed. In the end, there's only one way to win in highsec--our way. You can read about it on our website. Highsec CEOs, don't let your corp members suffer any longer!

46 comments:

  1. Typical high sec bullies. Cant wait for ccp to start handing out more bans.
    On the miners side, would have been so easy for him to just disband the corp and reform it, and viola, code would have wasted 50 mil in a pointless war. If james 315 could do it for the first year, why cant mining corps ehh?

    Oh yea, CODE always looses, always!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Confirming that CODE always looses [justice upon highsec]

      Delete
    2. Miner, looses as a gooses. And calm down!

      Delete
    3. I love it when Carebears mimic CODE. sayings and practices
      It just shows how hard CODE. is winning!

      Delete
    4. Ming Tso, indeed. Cultural victory achieved!

      Delete
    5. "Alana Charen-TengJanuary 19, 2015 at 9:22 PM"
      Is that your orgasm sound when James dick going deep in your brown eye?
      You keep saying that alot so it must be the dick in the brown eye that talks ;)

      Delete
    6. "Ming TsoJanuary 20, 2015 at 1:00 PM"
      Hard to hear when you have your mouth full of James cock, spit it out so we can hear you ;)

      Delete
    7. It's a little unsettling how many rebels have a downright Freudian obsession with the Saviour's sexuality.

      Delete
    8. "AnonymousJanuary 20, 2015 at 10:05 PM"
      It's the truth not an obsession ;)

      Delete
    9. I question the efficacy of your objectives given you believe that spending 50m isk on a war dec only to be Phoenixed counts as a win.

      Delete
  2. Another victory for New Order!

    ReplyDelete
  3. James last statement is so true. Following the CODE highsec industrial corporations WIN! ALWAYS!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. no they don't, they loose their freedom to a bunch of arrogant clowns...

      Delete
    2. You are proving my point DJ....

      Delete
    3. calm down miner

      Delete
    4. If there is a greater freedom to be had for an industrialist than building catalysts and similar war materiel for CODE., I can't imagine it. CODE. wins, always. That goes for CODE.'s many allies and fellow travelers in the industrial sectors of highsec as well. Remember friends: http://i.imgur.com/m0FgRS7.jpg

      Delete
  4. Only took a few seconds to EFT a maxed tank retriever. This baby has 3x the tank of normal retrievers, sports an automatic targeter for AFK mining as well as ECM drones for that random chance. The armor is of course tuned for blaster damage.

    [Retriever, CODE barge]

    Strip Miner I
    Auto Targeting System II

    Adaptive Invulnerability Field II

    Damage Control II
    Armor Kinetic Hardener II
    Armor Thermic Hardener II

    3x Medium Trimark Armor Pump II

    5x Hornet EC-300

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What's the total hp?

      Delete
    2. Is it natural for you to be this stupid? More evidence showing that the average minerbumping.com reader lacks basic knowledge.


      Your fit, 26,6k EHP vs Void. Note the T2 rigs, adding to total cost. Also armor, why. 94mil est total cost.


      [Retriever, Code]
      Damage Control II
      Reinforced Bulkheads II
      Reinforced Bulkheads II

      Kinetic Deflection Field II

      Strip Miner I
      Strip Miner I

      Medium Anti-Thermal Screen Reinforcer I
      Medium Anti-Thermal Screen Reinforcer I
      Medium Core Defense Field Extender I


      24,3k EHP vs Void. T1 rigs, 36mil est total cost.



      [Retriever, Code T2 Rig]
      Damage Control II
      Reinforced Bulkheads II
      Reinforced Bulkheads II

      Kinetic Deflection Field II

      Strip Miner I
      Strip Miner I

      Medium Core Defense Field Extender II
      Medium Core Defense Field Extender II
      Medium Anti-Thermal Screen Reinforcer II


      Same fit, but with T2 rigs instead.
      25,315 EHP vs Void (not kidding), 81m est total cost.

      Delete
    3. His fit has more EHP than yours.
      And you place more value on money than you do life.
      You're the idiot.

      Delete
    4. Who is the idiot?
      The one sucking James cock or the one who play the game as they want?

      Delete
    5. @Ming Tso
      The 10mil you save from the fit you can invest in a mining permit.

      Delete
    6. Anon@11:16

      Which is still skimping on good tank over a few measly million isk. Sounds bot-aspirant to me. A Code-compliant miner would max his tank, *and* buy a permit. Come on, it's not like we're even requiring faction or officer mods here, just a basic t2 tank. A "new" 5 year-old player should be able to fit that, and afford that.

      Delete
  5. Replies
    1. So how does that ban feel DJ?
      Does it feel like your winning?

      Delete
    2. How bitter do you think someone has to be to say something like that? Anybody? I'm thinking at least a 7.

      -Oink

      Delete
    3. Anonymous 5:45, you need to watch more movies and read The Code. Then you might understand that the Code is similar to, but better than, the Force. Though DJ was struck down, he has only become more powerful than before. Carebears, by contrast, are pencil-necked dweebs that can't understand the fearsome power that James 315 has imbued us with.

      Delete
    4. Awww, is that tears i see for a fellow member struck down?
      *hands out buckets*
      Please catch those tears, they are so tasty!

      Delete
    5. "AnonymousJanuary 20, 2015 at 4:29 PM"
      Do you admit that James forces his cock into every Code. members brown eye?

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. Yes, as always they win so I can get your brown eye for lunch ;)

      Delete
  7. These miners are so inept. It nearly takes the honor out of victory. Nearly.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good thing CODE dosent have any honor to start with ehh?

      Delete
    2. Says who? You? LOL!
      You know not of which you speak child. Go back to the kiddies table and let the adults talk now. That's a good boy.

      Delete
    3. code wouldn't know honor if it sat on ther face .

      Delete
  8. I wonder what would happen if you take up all these new players when they were actually new and gave them a corp that gave them ships and content out in null to play, have fun, be taught and trained in best practices before they unleashed themselves in the belts of high sec for three+ years?

    Sadly CEO's like this are all too common and give Eve a bad name. Thankfully there's an extra corp that will take new players who want to learn to play Eve a good time before they even see an asteroid belt in an untanked mining ship in high sec.

    Sadly there's no way to make people lose ten ships before they're allowed to leave the starter system to make losing ships that little less painful and combat a buzz to roam for.

    ReplyDelete
  9. "Spell it out for me!"
    Bots fear ambiguity
    And so do miners

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Maria MalukkerJanuary 20, 2015 at 12:38 PM"
      Spit out that ugly thing in you mouth so we can here you ;)

      Delete
    2. Calm down, miner.

      Delete
  10. I LOL'd at this..."The declaration of war made peace talks even more tense."

    Comedy gold right there. The Code always wins!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. there is no comedy in what you lot do .
      only spite and childish malice .

      Delete
    2. @Anon5:24
      There is no spite or malice in what you do.
      Only comedy.
      [x] Rekt

      Delete
    3. @ Ming Tso a very apt childish response well done

      Delete

Note: If you are unable to post a comment, try enabling the "allow third-party cookies" option on your browser.