Sunday, January 11, 2015

Kills of the Week

This week is all about getting from Point A to Point B. The carebears we've encountered have a knack for blaming everyone but themselves when they end up in a place--or on a killmail--that they don't like. Under New Order rule, everyone in highsec has a responsibility to take responsibility. If you're in a hauler moving a bunch of stuff from Point A and you wind up in a Point B that you didn't plan for, it's time to think back on how you really got there. It's much more productive than writing death threats to gankers and/or their families.

With this in mind, here are some kills from the week of January 4th @ 00:00 EVEtime through January 10th @ 23:59 EVEtime.



This is Point A. Can you guess where Point B is?


As you might guess, Point B is a 6.2 billion isk jump freighter killmail in Uedama. Anyone could have anticipated this. Yet Kendaris Amalia was taken completely by surprise. Incredible. Agents John E Normus, Kahvegi, loyalanon, Krominal, Aaaarrgg, Cytheera, karma balancer, Sly Ship, Pod-Goo RepoWoman, Rick Therapist, Carebears' Nightmare, reaper Shardani, Keraina Talie-Kuo, Jason Kusion, HABEPHO, Emotion Sasen, Jacob Kelbrand, Fabulous Andy, Chocolate Mooses, John Ryder, BoneyTooth Thompkins ISK-Chip, Killing ItsABusiness, Brutal Anna, Sophia Soprano, Phryxis, Amyclas Lacedaemon, Sasha Cohenberg, BAE B BLUE, and Dr Raholan made the inevitable happen.



Kal Zakath packed everything he owned into a triple-anti-tanked freighter and navigated his ship dangerously close to Uedama. Interesting fact: Kal declined to purchase a mining permit before he set out on his adventure. This was an 11.5 billion isk mistake, because the exciting part of his adventure happened much sooner than he expected. Agents Emotion Sasen, John E Normus, Talon Calais, Norek Crendraven, Ilithyia Borgia, Rick Therapist, Porky, Gorila Vengaza, Quaker Oatmeal, Globby, Carebears' Nightmare, Jason Kusion, Dr Rammstein, Martyr Oira, Brutal Anna, and Sasha Cohenberg provided the excitement.

This was a bad week for unlicensed hauler pilots: See this 10.2 billion isk Charon or this 9.8 billion isk Anshar, for example.



In today's highsec, having been propelled into the future by the New Order's advanced philosophy, we understand that Mackinaws, Retrievers, Hulks, and Covetors are insufficiently tanked. Miners should always take care to utilize the more tanked versions, such as Skiffs and Procurers. zack pilot managed to lose all four of the lesser-tanked mining ships in a single explosion! Agent HotShotX Warcastle performed the hat-trick, or whatever you'd call it when you get all four of something.



...And Fallain Silvarius provided the Ice Harvesters--58 of them--when he lost this Iteron V to Agent HotShotX Warcastle. You don't need to be psychic to stop an illegal mining operation before it starts; you only need to shoot some AFK autopiloting carebears.



You can tell Talli Wildstar was headed for heartbreak just by looking at the fittings on her Nereus, or by looking at the 2.3 billion isk pricetag on the killmail. How did Agents Rick Therapist, Brutal Anna, and Carebears' Nightmare manage to inflict such a heavy loss against Talli? Let's have a peak at Point A:


The ship was carrying a collection of implants, of course. As is unfortunately sometimes the case, several large groups of refugees were caught in the crossfire. Their blood is on the carebear's hands.



So much for warp core stabs. Mike Haamilton loaded up his belongings into an Orca and was promptly suicide ganked by Agents Globby and Emotion Sasen, each of whom inflicted about half the damage on this kill. You might be wondering how an Orca could get suicide ganked by only two Agents. For an explanation, see this article on TheMittani.com. Unlike the carebears, our Agents know many creative ways of getting from Point A to Point B.

The New Order's critics like to say that we're all about terrorizing highsec, or bullying carebears, or harvesting tears from them, or perhaps that we're engaged in some grand conspiracy to manipulate the market. Others say that the trillions of isk of damage we inflict is evidence of our inability to perform "honourable" PvP, or to pump up our egos.

All interesting theories--and all wrong. The kills are performed for a simple reason. Our goal is to get highsec from Point A to Point B...

...to Point C. Guess what the "C" stands for?

35 comments:

  1. The Code ALWAYS Wins!!!!! ALWAYS!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. "C" stands for "Carebear-free".

    Yeah, I know what it really stands for . . . just getting creative.

    Well done, fellow agents of the New Order!

    ReplyDelete
  3. no...the "C" stands for Crap...as in the code is Crap...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "C" is for Calm down, miner

      Delete
  4. A *huge* congratulations to CODE. for breaking the ten trillion ISK destroyed barrier today!

    To borrow a line that I believe was first uttered by loyalanon...

    The Code always wins! ALWAYS!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Loyalanon also wrote, If the alliance had to choose would it be you or me?

      So hows the NPC corp working out?

      Delete
    2. How are permabans for DJ, D400, and Jerry Rin working out? Seems like Aria made the right choice to avoid getting banned from the game for real life harassment.

      Delete
    3. "C" stands for... "C"ant think of anything witty to say!

      Delete
    4. @Veers Belvar - Where you got the idea I would have made the decision I did in order to avoid a potential ban is beyond me. Ganking is not, and never has been, harassment. Nor is awox'ing, corp theft, scamming or any of the other numerous forms of emergent gameplay that are so vitally important to the health of EVE. If you feel that someone has been harassed in real life due to actions taken against them in a online video game, please be a friend to them and suggest they seek professional help.

      Delete
    5. Blah blah talking points blah.

      I'm bored of mining red crosses, and I feel like people haven't been talking about me enough lately. So let's all talk about me now! I'll go first.

      I'm great, and you're all idiots, you idiots. You should feel bad IRL, because I think you want to make other people feel bad IRL, and that makes you bad people IRL who should be punished IRL and kill yourselves IRL. So how about instead of talking about how much you improve the game and how much content and social interaction you promote, we talk about how I'm a good guy IRL because I like mining red crosses in-game? Because as we all know, carebearing in-game makes you a good person IRL.

      Mmmm, my farts smell good.

      Delete
  5. Fallain Silvarius is a known alt of Veers, just google it for proof

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah yeah I googled "Fallain Silvarius Veers Belvar" and there does seem to be a connection.

      Delete
  6. Where's butthurt miner these days? seems like years since I saw one of his posts obsessing over James 315's ass

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe he biomassed in despair after Gorila defected.

      Delete
    2. In some languages there are over 20 different words to describe that which comes out of your butt. The Bristol stool scale only identifies seven of them.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale

      Delete
  7. C stands for cunt. Your all fucking cunts for runing our game!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. miner, calm down.

      Delete
    2. C is for "C"ontrolling, or, as you say it, "running" your game.

      Delete
    3. I hate miners too Anonymous January 12, 2015 at 2:18 PM, but I hate Code even more.

      I say the "C" is for Cult. That's what Code is.

      Delete
    4. I hate everyone who doesn't mine red crosses just like I do, because making pointless money running pointless incursions so you can buy meaningless bling you'll never use for anything except running more incursions is the only proper way to play the game. Interacting with people doesn't get you money, so it's pointless, so it's immoral, so it's illegal IRL. Did I mention I'm a lawyer? You idiots!

      Delete
  8. Veers,
    It's not a cult if the beliefs are true.

    You can't point to one thing the Savior has said or in the Code that is untrue.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Actually there are several things...the using of players proxies to start with...he did not have the right to use them without permission...and that can't be deemed into existence...the code is a lie...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. One of the great things about living under New Order Rule is the fact that James knows how to create a governmental structure that both uses paperwork where it is necessary and doesn't use it when it would be unwieldly or otherwise create a bureaucratic hassle.

      Can you imagine the amount of unnecessary paperwork that would be created if James was required to obtain, in writing, the proxies of every highsec resident in the time that was required for the election of Supreme Commander? That would be ludicrous! So therefore, the process was necessarily simplified so that the Saviour of Highsec could be allowed to cast the votes of His supporters by proxy, thus both eliminating needless pwperwork AND installing the most qualified candidate to the position of Supreme Protector with one single act!

      Now THAT's what I call government efficiency!!

      Delete
    2. And that if why james, the code and the new order are a farce...everyone was disenfranchised by the buffoon of highsec...

      Delete
    3. Amen, Ming Tso! James in his wisdom has managed to create a form of government which includes all the due process and protections necessary to ensure fairness and justice for all highsec residents, while at the same time preventing any of these bureaucratic measures from being abused by space lawyers and their carebear clients. From the Universal Highsec Election which first established James as the Supreme Protector, down to the everyday courtroom trials of today, there is always *just enough* paperwork...never too much, and never too little. It's really quite amazing how any one person could so perfectly manage the apparatus of government.

      But then, he *is* James. And he does have the Code to guide him. Perhaps it shouldn't be that surprising after all.

      Delete
    4. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
  10. James has the right as you chose not to vote on the issue. The fact you were unaware of its existence shows amazing ignorance on your part and you can be blessed James (peace be upon him) stepped in on your part.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did not have a choice...this was done in secret so you can make your false claims...

      Delete
  11. james is a thief...

    ReplyDelete
  12. Did he steal your heart?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He had her at "Hello . . . . . where's your permit?"

      Delete

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