Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Jaywalking Through Highsec

"Mining without a permit is but a minor offense, like jaywalking," says the carebear. "Where's the harm in it?"


But jaywalking is dangerous, and can get you killed. An elite squadron comprised of Agents Capt Starfox, John E Normus, and loyalanon entered Brapelille, a strategic system in Gallente-themed New Order space. The three heavy hitters engaged jwalker59's Hulk and decisively won the battle.


jwalker59, along with his other alts in Jwalking corp, was a "new player" in the carebear sense: He'd been playing EVE for more than 5 years. He was still a highsec miner. And not a very alert one, since his pod failed to escape in the aftermath of the New Order's victory at the Battle of Brapelille.


One of jwalker's alts initiated diplomatic contact in Brapelille local.


Another of jwalker's alts, Raz3r Funaila, continued the tearmaking. A lot of carebears switch alts in the middle of a conversation. It's an instinctive behavior; some animals do similar things to puff up and make themselves appear bigger when threatened.


Raz3r belonged to the "cancer" school of carebear thought. It is closely related to the "I hope your family dies" carebearist philosophy, which Raz3r also espoused.


The miner was a disobedient one. Not only had he refused to purchase a permit; he refused to calm down when explicitly commanded to by highsec authorities.


After five years of "playing" EVE, Raz3r had developed some bad habits. He also had some misconceptions about the game. He couldn't recognize PvP even when it came up and slapped him in the face.


As our Agents tastefully celebrated in their victory in Brapelille local, the miner intruded, a skunk at the garden party.


Would this miner ever calm down? Anecdotally, I've found that the best way for a miner to calm down is for him to purchase a permit. But Raz3r wouldn't even do that.


The five-year veteran of EVE who had never done anything but mine in highsec continued to squawk at our Agents about the meaning of "real PvP".


From the safety of a station, the miner switched alts again and the flow of tears resumed. They did not cease, even as the New Order's elite squadron came to the assistance of miners in a neighboring system. The jaywalkers of highsec are still in desperate need of the Code. Do you think we'll give up on them? Not a chance.

54 comments:

  1. If this carebear got to play god for a day, he'd be handing out cancer like candy.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This was certainly a straight up shot, representative of the carebear problem.

    Sometimes it's slow and builds. Sometimes it's just hard and fast. This is one of the latter.

    When reality just hits you in the face like The Code hit that miner in the face, you can't just ignore it. You need to "recognize," and "get with the program." Unfortunately, it sounds like that miner will need quite a few more hits to the face to convince it that the Code is real, and the New Order is for real, and Agents not lying when we say you must have a New Order Mining Permit to do PvE in James 315 space.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The code is a lie and the new order is a bunch of pirates...agents do lie when claiming you need a permit, you do not need a permit, just tank and prepare to shoot when the morons approach...Highsec does not belong to any player, and that includes jamie

      Delete
    2. Miner, it would really help the situation if you would please calm down.

      Delete
    3. @Anon8:05
      What the miner says is incorrect. It is incapable of "shooting" New Order Agents- and even if it were, it is still incapable of stopping a New Order Agent. The New Order Agent does as he or she pleases, because The New Order are the rightful owners and rulers of Highsec. Miners are not allowed to have any say that the New Order does not first approve.

      Delete
  3. Silly carebear mining with 500M worth of missile implants. What will they do next?
    I certainly hope he got extra enforcement attention after that tirade...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Good lord almighty. Do Carebears always act like that? I happened on this site through an agents profile and some of the things I see them saying in chat is reprehensible. Maybe I have been out in Null for way too long but I am disgusted at how I see them treat you. Attitudes like theirs are a great reason to stay out of Hi Sec. I don't admire your job, But I cant thank you enough for trudging through the waste to do it.

    ReplyDelete
  5. How many times can you blap someone before it becomes a harassment?

    Regards RS

    FSOP

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. and you know that it is harassment!, all of you so called saviors are just killing EvE, and all i can do is shitpost on this blog about how great FSOP is. but it is a lie, it is really just me, a lonely, overweight, middle-aged woman, trying to remain relevant and failing harder than the AG folks!

      now you see me

      Regards RS

      FSOP

      Delete
    2. As far as I can tell, they blapped him one time. I guess that's harassment in your world.

      Delete
    3. Sorry guys I was angry and not thinking straight. I apologize for my insults, and promise to count 10 in the future.

      Regards RS

      FSOP

      Delete
    4. there's nnothing wrong with blapping someone repeatedly - as long as it has some 'finiancial' (i.e. ISK for the permit) motivation behind it ccp won't take it as harassment cause the victim could as well try to gather some friends for help, relocate to a different area, switch activities, etc.
      now if you just blap someone for the lols and keep doing that for days on end it's a different story.

      Delete
    5. Calm down agents Calm down!

      Regards RS

      FSOP

      p.s. Vive la Panorad!

      Delete
  6. Stopped by to praise the (usually) amusing flair of this blog, but this post is clearly filler. Perhaps its a little much to ask for good storytelling on a daily basis, but if you're interested in keeping things fresh I'd recommend again complacency! Common code, you can do it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. first, anon 726 don't know shit.
      second, "fucking pussy fucks" made me lol :)
      third, nasty nasty carebears.

      Delete
    2. "but if you're interested in keeping things fresh I'd recommend again complacency! Common code, you can do it!"

      ...
      Miner, please calm down and try to form coherent sentences.

      Delete
  7. It cracks me up how you guys pass off harassment as appropriate behavior. Makes sense that your leader was banned for encouraging harassment of another player to kill himself in real life.

    But hey, whatever post you want to hitch your horse to is your prerogative.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It has been established that God was just fucking around when he told Abraham to kill Isaac.

      Get over it already, that was like 3000 years ago.

      Delete
    2. If you want to have an intellectual conversation, you're going to have to calm down.

      Delete
    3. james 315 is banned?

      Delete
    4. I think OP is referring to that incident where Mittani got drunk and said some embarassing things about that other player (The Wis?). In other words, OP thinks New Order = goonspiracy.

      vov

      Delete
    5. Typical anti New Order thinking. I saw the New Order=Goons thing on a Hi Sec militia site a while back. People will go to any lengths to vilify good work.

      Delete
    6. If what the code monkeys do is good work, they would not get Concordokken for it, it actually is not good, it is far from it...

      Delete
    7. "it actually is not good, it is far from it..."

      You're right. It's not good, it's great!

      Delete
    8. It is wonderful work. Have you ever spent a day with the New Order? Anon12:05? I have and the group as a whole has a camaraderie this game needs. The New Order has a purpose and a goal. I have been on both sides of the coin and from a "Fun" aspect, from an inclusiveness aspect and from a helpfulness aspect (Fitting and strategy) I'd say the New Order really has the monopoly. Miners complain about the New Order not letting them play their style but then tries to stop the new order from playing their own...

      Delete
    9. It is well established that the new order is the goons bitch. So far, I have not had a run in with the new order in my neck of the woods. Lately, I have been running incursions without a permit. Come and find me. But of course, you will also have to contend with a fleet of battleships that will chew you apart, which is why we never see any code agents.

      Delete
    10. Lol a butthurtminer, the idiot-bot. Everyone knows it is just veers-bot, shitposting all day rather than play EvE like a real player.

      Delete
    11. hey whattup oldschool butthurt? any more stories about how old school on the internet you are?

      Delete
  8. This is a very serious case of butthurt by this jwalker fellow

    ReplyDelete
  9. "Gallente-themed New Order space."
    had me laugh out loud! :D

    ReplyDelete
  10. 'Not real pvp' So the miner doesn't think of himself as a player?
    Is this what bot aspirantcey does in the end?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It all comes down to lack of personal responsibility. The Miners cannot seem take responsibility for their laziness and lax playing style. They are the same folks who in RL take liberties with the law and get butthurt hen arrested or fined

      Delete
    2. If they want to play that way, then let them. Who is the new order to say otherwise?

      Delete
    3. @ butthurtbotminer.
      The NO is just playing how they see fit. Your argument is bot-aspirant.
      Did you forget your prep-h, butthurtbotminer?

      Regards RS

      FSOP

      Delete
  11. Concord really should have stepped in here and prevented this gank as CODE is ruining the NPE like this guy who will take his 2-4 accounts and move over to another game... soon code will have to gank themselves for tears.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ... Can't tell if real Veers or fake Veers...

      Delete
    2. No great loss if he does leave. You can join him, no big loss there either.

      Delete
    3. Funny, that is how a lot of player feel about you code monkeys, asia...

      Delete
    4. I am sure that is the butthurt veers

      Delete
  12. sooo... code pvp like

    Walking in the streets this is what i see some dumb person paying more attention to their phone than to me, i ganked her and you know it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Miner, we're really going to have to ask you to calm down a little bit.

      Delete
  13. I think it´s ok to gank, there should be no safe place in eve as long as it's with the gamemechanics. But i don't like the farming for tears. if i had ganked this guy i had write a petition after the second IRL-deaththread, close the convo, block him and go for the next one.
    If someone in EVE make this game dieing than it where people like jwalker. Who wants to play with or against such people? I mean i got such IRL-deathreats for mining in the same belt with some other guy.. then i ganked him, he wished me more deaths , from next day he was on eve-holiday for 4 weeks

    greetings
    Miner with teeth

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If CCP banned all those that issued real life threats two things would happen.

      High Sec would really be sparsely inhabited and secondly the New Order would have very few targets.

      Of course they could then say it's a win - win situation.

      Delete
    2. @ Daniel Sidrat,
      You left out the third thing.
      If ccp banned everyone who did real life threats then at least 95% of current and future code members would be gone.
      As for a win - win, yes, the game would as a whole win if the majority of code where gone.
      *waits for the flood of code tears over this comment*

      Delete
    3. @Anon7:29
      Please cite one instance where a New Order Agent has ever made a real-life threat against a miner.

      As we have clearly shown, it is the insipid miner who is known for making the real life death threats, as it cannot control its temper.

      Delete
    4. Calm down miner @ 7:33, Calm Down!
      If new order agents where not doing real life threats, why do they get banned so often. Once again, ming, logic escapes you.
      Besides ming, why should you comment? Its not like your an agent.

      Delete
    5. Anon @ 12:59,
      Pro Tip: When talking to ming do not use words that are to long. Remember that ming is like a little child, if you use big words it will confuse him and anger him. We do not want more temper tantrums from ming.

      -=M=-

      Delete
    6. Which works out, because you and i dont know any big words anyway

      -=M=-

      Delete
    7. Guyz! Y u bee so meanz to meee!
      Itz nots my faults i haz a speetch impediment.....pleeze be kinds to mee.

      Miing Tso...

      Delete
  14. Can everyone please calm down?

    ReplyDelete
  15. I see the Jaywalkers belong to the AIDS/Cancer group. What happened to the people who want to see CODE. in flames? Already out of fashion agin?

    ReplyDelete
  16. Meh, seems like more CODE alts...........

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hurray! Cpt Starfox is back! The coolest badguy in eve!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Fantastic piece of writing. Lol'd several times. Classic post.

    ReplyDelete

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