Friday, July 10, 2015

The Rise of the Space Neocons, Part 7

Previously, on MinerBumping... PwnySquad experienced a crippling series of setbacks, including the loss of all its assets in a "PL feeder corp" scam. PwnySquad's leader, koiso Phoenix, struggled to deal with each new crisis. However, after being repeatedly killed by her own corp members, koiso started to question whether it was even worth it. She even began to doubt the wisdom of her most trusted advisor, TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet, who had encouraged her to enable friendly fire in the corp.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > im in comms with the guys who are holding my freigher
koiso Phoenix > of course you are
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > its the CODE guys again
koiso Phoenix > why am i not suprised is this another PL friend
For some reason, TheInternet always seemed to know more about what was going on with koiso's own corp than koiso did. At first, this made TheInternet appear valuable. Now it was getting difficult to swallow.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > they said they will leave us alone just come on comms and they will explain
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I cant agree as I'm not the CEO
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > i think it would be for the best of the corp to lose these guys
koiso Phoenix > link me the ts
Agents of the New Order were to blame for the freighter hostage situation. koiso joined them on TeamSpeak to negotiate.
koiso Phoenix > this corp will be dispanded tomorrwo
Although a recording of the conversation is not available, there is evidence to suggest that the negotiations didn't go very well.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I don't think so
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I won't let you ruin this corp
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Not again

At the last moment, when PwnySquad's future truly seemed to be in doubt, TheInternet swooped in and saved the day. The man of the hour just so happened to be in possession of 100% of the corp stock.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Tomorrow I will become CEO
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > and I will apply the corporation into PL, and get in this time
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > koiso Phoenix this corporation now belongs to me, the deal will be finalized in 24 hours
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Your services are no longer required here.
Considering all of the challenges faced by PwnySquad over the previous few days, it was widely felt that the corp needed a change in direction. It was the general sentiment of the corp members--almost exclusively awoxers--that the old CEO needed to go. PwnySquad was looking for a man on horseback, and they found one in TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet.

TheInternet respected PwnySquad's traditions and was well aware of the problems associated with making sweeping changes too precipitously. However, as much as he loved PwnySquad, he loved the Code more. He could accept nothing less than an immediate, radical transformation of the corp culture.
koiso Phoenix > have funn boss man
koiso Phoenix > yea np
koiso Phoenix > i hope you guys enjoyed it
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Thank you, I hope you use this as a learning lesson
koiso Phoenix > ok your welcome
Though expressing her opinion more colorfully in TeamSpeak, koiso took a reserved, passive-aggressive posture in corp chat.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > koiso Phoenix btw, if you haven't figured it out
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I orchestrated the whole thing, from the very beginning, at every stage
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > The wardec was my doing
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > The surrender was my doing
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Everything
koiso Phoenix > this is just a game i'll just move back to nullsec this doesnt bother me i not going to loose anysleep over this
In the interest of full disclosure, TheInternet debriefed the outgoing CEO. Then the accounting and liquidation of all PwnySquad assets commenced.

TheInternet sold everything left and began the process of tallying the value of all of the previously confiscated/sold goods. Of interest: 37 Talos hulls that the "PL feeder corp" was required to purchase, and a Gallente Titan skillbook whose sinister purpose can only be speculated upon. Counting all of the assets that came into the possession of TheInternet and the awoxers, koiso suffered a total loss of more than 28 billion isk.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Try to get to know people for a few months before you give them all of your assets
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > I'd say you can have that tip for free
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > but it actually cost you 28B
koiso Phoenix > i'll problem have played for a few more month and taken another 2year break
koiso Phoenix > lol so its just fake money saved up its not hard to make more of it thats what you fail to relize
koiso Phoenix > good night
Did koiso grow from this experience, or did she see it as an opportunity to buy more PLEX?
New Order Bullshit
From: Hateburn Crematorius
Sent: 2015-04-17 13:04:00
To: koiso Phoenix

So should we start another corp or something?

Re: New Order Bullshit
From: koiso Phoenix
Sent: 2015-04-19 00:18:00
To: Hateburn Crematorius

im not restarting anything right now until i get some friend to educate me of the proper way to run a corp

In the immediate aftermath of the New Order takeover, koiso had soured on the whole "highsec PvE corp" thing.

Eventually, koiso cleaned up her bio and started a new corp with her CEO alt. Despite her earlier ambitions of moving to nullsec, it was another highsec PvE corp.

There were some encouraging signs. koiso had learned a lot from the New Order.

Then again, "a lot" may be overstating it.

Ultimately, however, it was a tremendous victory for the New Order, the Code, and the newly formed "Space Neocons". They realized that many small highsec carebear corps desire to become feeder corps for Pandemic Legion. Such carebears are willing to pay almost any price. The Space Neocons resolved to test the limits of the bot-aspirants and their tragic greed.


  1. It's times like these that I am happy to be part of the winning team! The Code always wins!

  2. "In the immediate aftermath of the New Order takeover, koiso had soured on the whole "highsec PvE corp" thing."

    And this, this, is what we intend to do. This is the glorious and inevitable end to the New Order's Actions. Hopefully, Koiso will indeed learn that Highsec PvE corps are total shit, and leave and go seek his existence in Lowsec, where people are nicer.

  3. Carebear shoulda said "im not STARTING anything right now until i get some friend to educate me of the proper way to run a corp"

  4. Round of applause for Space Neocons - and for the Saviour's deliciously judged instalments!

  5. Real sad thing is that code is totally unaware of just how easy it is to make isk in this game.
    Only the weak need to steal when its so easy to get rich with little effort. Alas, i fear code will never learn, thus the weak will continue to join them.
    As koiso Phoenix said, and i quote "lol so its just fake money saved up its not hard to make more of it thats what you fail to relize"

    1. Anonymous,

      The game is not about "making ISK" to the New Order. It's about making content.

      Once again, carebear thinks everyone thinks like him.

    2. @ 8:36

      Who cares? I only make as much isk as I think I'll need. What is the point of stock piling hundreds of billions, or trillions of isk if you are never going to spend that much isk?

      Personally I make Isk by low sec ratting and C2/C3 WH ratting for a couple hours a week. It isn't much, but its normally more then enough isk for what I am doing. Having 3+ Trillion isk in your wallet may be great, but whats the point if it isn't being used?

    3. Then why are most of the agents in the 2 main choke points on the travel lanes ganking freighters all of the time instead of spread across New Eden spreading that feces that you call content, revis? This seems to be more Orwellian doublespeak from you code monkeys....

    4. I find it funny that code always says that 'only' the miners care about isk, when they constantly brag about how much they stole or ganked. If it was true that code did not care for isk *stops to laugh for a moment at the thought*, then why bother to loot the wrecks of freighters? I would like to see code 'prove it' that they dont care about isk by ganking a few freighters, then killing the wreck with all the loot inside, instead of looting it (like they always do).
      Unfortunately, code loves isk far to much to do something like that.

    5. In b4 the epic tears from code.

    6. he has a point you lot do talk an awful lot about isk considering it (supposedly) means nothing to you (which it quite obviously does)
      oh and asia you also like to point out how expensive the empty freighters are too.
      but of course it means nothing to you does it.

    7. This ^^^^ Totally This.

    8. You are confusing our loathing of "isk/hour" obsession with no regards to safety or sanity, as performed by the average highsec miner with ISK in general.

      We are strongly against the former, the latter is totally cool with us. Hope that helps!

    9. no confusion here chocolatemooses.
      you are just as concerned about isk as any miner, in fact more so in some cases as you die all the time to concord just as they die all the time to you lot. so isk has to be and is a big concern for you isk, no ganks, you can stop the spin now thanks.

    10. "Now it's a teachable moment and helps fund more gank ships. Win-win."

      see ...another reference to the isk you supposedly don't care about.
      thanks ALANA.

    11. @3:53PM Gank Catalysts are free to any agent, that's what the treasury is for. Beyond that, the average CODE./GoonSwarm alliance member has no problem buying as many catalysts as they could ever need, as we are not space poor. Plus, James 315 gives 100% SRP anyway :-)

      @3:56PM Melting down the stuff we get from those flying without a permit and turning the junk into more gank ships is a time honored tradition, not to mention a ton of fun :-)

      End point being, we're EVE players like everyone else in the regard that we use ISK values of targets when discussing them. Who doesn't? It's really a logical benchmark. As to this meaning that we are somehow "concerned" about anything, or "care" about anything, that's a bit of a stretch there, miner.

    12. ^ AG's best and brightest right here, folks. No wonder they're failing nonstop daily continuously.

    13. Alana: At least we have them sort of interacting with other players. Now we just have to teach them how to not be awful at it :-)

  6. Friday Fun Fact: Humans are Deutrostomes, which means that when they develop in the womb, the anus forms before any opening. Which basically means at one point you where nothing but an asshole. Amazing how code members never develop beyond this point.

    1. In your case your tear glands were the first formed and never developed beyond that point. Your country of residence is now the largest exporter of salt (once they have dried your tears of course) You should be proud!!!!!

    2. Lovely tears there wolf, please let them keep pouring out :)

    3. Wolf Soprano, You are still alive? I thought I ordered you to the gas chambers along time ago. Someone take this "subhuman" out of my sight and dispose of "it" before "it" starts poisoning the gene pool.

    4. And there goes mingleling....Ordering others of its kind to the gas chambers...

  7. Replies
    1. I'm sorry no one is home right now. Please leave a note at the door and we will get back to you as soon as possible.

      Do you wish to buy a mining permit?

  8. Not faulting CODE or the AWOXERS style of play here, but personally if I suspected someone was dumping a huge amount of real life money into the game to fund all these extravagant purchases.... I would have emptied the shares and hijacked the corporation sooner. Made it a teachable event before the person sunk too much into the ISK pit.

    1. Now it's a teachable moment and helps fund more gank ships. Win-win.


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