Thursday, January 7, 2016

The Best Kind of Web, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Agent and newly elected Bumper's Union chairman Siegfried Cohenberg had no problem keeping freighter pilot Sgt Evo bump-tackled. Sgt Evo's distress call in Anti-Ganking yielded a handful of hapless carebears who joined a small fleet and did little else. But suddenly, Siegfried was thwarted by Amadeo Giannini, who proved far more elite than the rest of the Anti-Gankers. As Amadeo and Sgt Evo opened a duel and Amadeo went to fetch a ship with a webifier, all hope seemed lost.

Could the New Order really lose? It's impossible, but the Anti-Gankers felt that a victory could finally be within their grasp. But carebears, take warning: If you think you're going to win--or even if you think you've already won--think again.


Take, for example, the case of Tempusa Fujit's 11 billion isk freighter. It was ganked by a New Order fleet in yet another extraordinary victory for the Code. The fact that 9.2 billion isk of the freighter's cargo dropped was icing on the cake. Nearby anti-Code miscreants were utterly unable to prevent the gank, so they tried to put a damper on the party by shooting the wreck. In this, too, they failed, as a freighter belonging to one of loyalanon's alts managed to scoop all the cargo just before the wreck popped.


Then came a plot twist. Since it went suspect for looting a gank victim's wreck, loyalanon's alt was doomed. All of the Anti-Gankers and random onlookers present were free to tackle and slowly destroy the freighter without CONCORD interference. Had the Anti-Gankers finally scored a victory? They sure thought so.


News of the dead New Order freighter spread like wildfire, and the anti-Code resistance became ecstatic. They shared links of the killmail far and wide. Remember the warning, though.


Despite looting over 9 billion isk in dropped cargo, the New Order alt freighter was surprisingly empty. A Station Vault Container and a Tempest, both from Tempusa Fujit's loot drop, were there. But everything else was missing. And then there was the matter of loyalanon's alt fitting his freighter with three cargo expanders, knowing perfectly well that such freighters are marked for death. Could it be...?


Another plot twist. As the Anti-Gankers were patting themselves on the back and shooting at loyalanon's alt freighter, he quietly ejected nearly all of the loot he'd scooped. Then, by "abandoning" the ejected cargo, he allowed any player to scoop it without going suspect. The Anti-Gankers whittled away at the freighter's HP, completely oblivious to another New Order freighter, named "Vindication", which intercepted the loot. The ships and equipment from the Tempusa Fujit gank, worth roughly 9 billion isk, were rescued right out from under the Anti-Gankers' noses. loyalanon's alt was a platinum insured suicide freighter, and its inevitable death had been part of the plan all along.

The moral of the story is that the CODE always wins. Always. Even when the Anti-Gankers think they've won, you ask? Yes. Especially then.


...Which brings us back to the tale of Siegfried, Sgt Evo, and Amadeo. Last time, we peeked at the Anti-Ganker fleet. There was a hint: Sgt Evo's limited engagement icon, and the lack of a fleet member icon for Amadeo. It could only mean that were were looking at the fleet from Amadeo's perspective.


"Something like that."


The truth was revealed. Amadeo had brought something far better than a web. He had the Code.


Our hero managed to infiltrate the Anti-Ganking movement. Instead of getting a webbing ship, Amadeo brought a Thrasher. Thanks to the active duel, he had a free pass to attack the freighter.


Trapped, the freighter was finally willing to speak with the man who had been bumping him for the last half-hour. Better late than never.


As usual, the carebear tried to stall. Siegfried was far too clever an Agent to be fooled. When you hold a ship for ransom, always keep the pressure on. The freighter pilot had no choice but to pay the 300 million isk ransom.


The 300 million isk payment bought the freighter some breathing room. Now that Siegfried had a comfort level with the carebear, he was willing to negotiate for the release of the freighter. Remember, Sgt Evo had only asked him "how much you want". Siegfried never said what he'd do once he received the amount.


Sgt Evo went silent, apparently unwilling to pay more money. So our heroes had no choice but to secure the destruction of his 2.2 billion isk Charon (valued at 2.8 billion by zKillboard).


As for the Anti-Gankers, they had some paperwork to do. File this one under "F" for "Failing continuously nonstop daily"?

40 comments:

  1. Here I was thinking AG had finally done something right and they let 10 bil in isk just float past them.

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  2. The anti-gankers could win so easily too, by just ganking the bumpers.



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    Replies
    1. That would require effort. Planning. Balls.
      You know, all the stuff they don't have..:)
      --------------
      Mike Adoulin

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    2. It would still be a CODE win, in so many ways.

      Lets start with ag carebears actually interacting with others AND shooting spaceships in a spaceship shooting game: CODE win!

      ag giving CODE bumping alts killrights on them: CODE win!

      ag carebears LEARNING some pvp while ganking bumpers: CODE win!

      Carebears resorting to GANKING because of the pressure of CODE activities: CODE win!

      See the pattern now ag?
      CODE always wins! Always!
      Even the sacrifical looting freighter was a CODE win!

      Don't be discouraged ag, at least you are given 'opportunities to learn', daily! (See what i did there? XD)

      Delete
  3. Ah but we have done a lot of good! And continue to do good. We have even ganked the bumpers! But you would never ever read about it here.

    To get the real story go to:

    http://highsecmilitia.blogspot.com/

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    Replies
    1. @High Sec Militia

      Apparently, We also cannot read about your supposed ganking of an empty CODE. freighter as it literally lateralled 9 billion isk right past your noses and how you were completely oblivious to that and were powerless to stop it. But we can read about that here!

      Because, in addition to failing at formatting, Anti-gankers feel that it is appropriate to have month-long "contests" where the prize is Tech 1 frigates. Such low class! Instead of, you know, caring enough to update their website with the frequency of the Saviour of Highsec. Such low stamina! No wonder anti-gankers are failing daily!

      Delete
    2. I thought the purpose of CODE. had nothing to do with isk? Yet hear you are crowing about 9 billion isk.............

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    3. @Anon7:53

      You are correct in that the end of The New Order is not isk, but the training of the bot-aspirant to renounce its ways and accept the Code.

      However, 9 billion isk, to be slipped out from under your nose like that, you must admit, is a pretty glaring failure, don't you agree?

      A failure that could have simply been avoided by following the Code, or, at least in this case, just using common sense and targeting the cargo container and shooting it!

      Anti-ganking clearly displayed here that they were neither aware of the Code, nor the Superiour Tactics of the New Order, which are the defenders of the Code.

      So therefore, I guess, the only conclusion that reasonable people could take from this is that, undoubtedly, Anti-Ganking is failing daily!

      Delete
    4. He can't get Web traffic on his fail blog so he advertises it on a real one. AG fails again.

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    5. I got a virus from that hisec militia site. gg aldo, you hacker.

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    6. @753. 'here' not 'hear'. Remember the acoustic one has an 'ear' in it.

      Get it? Acoustic, ear, hear?

      ag failed again.

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    7. You hear that... its the sound of a freighter warping away.... Gank failed.

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    8. and yet dead freighters keep appearing on the KB, what's up with that?

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    9. @Anon11:35

      I'll tell you what it is, it's the sound of the New Order Winning Yet Again over Anti-ganking, who are losing to the New Order yet again.

      Here's your proof: Dead freighters make a sound- Explosions. The carebear above you claimed that "freighters warping away make sounds." This is laughably untrue, and thus, hilariously wrong.

      Yet, another example of Anti-ganking failing Daily!!!!

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    10. Look at this miner, who gives me the power over it to compel it to post! It does not post of its own accord, but yet watches and waits for me to post, fuming with anger and rage. It is not often that I manage to enrage someone so completely that it loses the ability to post on its own.

      Delete
  4. 'Anti-ganking' claiming victory for the freighter is rather akin to the loser of a game of chess arguing that he was successful because he accepted the winning players gambit.

    It must be hard experiencing EVE in a perpetual state of loss against the grandmasters, and embarrassing to know nothing beyond endless failure.

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  5. And this is why lowsec is so much better than highsec.

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    Replies
    1. Like you would know, carebear. Anon658 <--another anoncarebear bragging about his low/null alt.

      Delete
  6. Did someone mention "Always" yet?

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  7. Oh man, AG was in Uedama this morning banging on about how they had blapped Armin's freighter and how high and mighty they were and all that kind of nonsense. I knew that it seemed too simple, so I decided not to chirp them, and lo and behold, there was indeed a little more to the story. And that's not only because The CODE. Always Wins, Always; but also because The New Order is stacked with Elite PvP'ers who know the ins and outs of New Eden almost as well as AG knows failure. Go team!

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  8. And kids, this is why you don't accept a duel from anyone you don't know... even if they say they will help you, it's a trap.

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  9. Antigankers kill an empty platinum insured freighter, code scoops 10bil in loot. Antiganking failed so hard!

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    Replies
    1. hahahahahha, that is just awesome!!!!

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    2. Instead of the Bait & Switch it was the Bait & Grab.

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    3. Hey ag, i own a building that needs to be demolished, but the cost to have that done is prohibitive. It is insured out the ass though, so maybe i can have the ag guys come over and 'protect' it for a few days. That should do the trick. :D

      Delete
  10. I love how happy AG was, until today. I am lmao thinking of the looks on their faces when they realize it was all a setup.

    p.s.

    Always! and Daily!

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  11. Jeezus! The "antigankers" are so bad at this game. I would think CODE should feel at least bit of remorse for fukin with ag so hard. It almost feels uncomfortable reading some of the bad advice and misinformation posted in the ag channels. I mean from JTclone to Dryson to Foxbolt (and all the others) all the ag are so, how should i describe it, thick. Slow. Dullards. I hesitate to use the word 'retarded', HOWEVER...

    ag call themselves the "good guys" when there is no benchmark by which to measure, as CCP has said it is all legal. Most of what ag claimes makes them the good guys involves shooting at people that are soon to be CONCORDed anyway.

    They try to shoot the loot cans sometimes, claiming that they are keeping it out of the hands of CODE, when in reality they are just destroying some carebears stuffs. The same thing they call CODE bad guys for doing, but from a 'legal' standpoint, they are destroying private property that does not belong to them. Again, something ag says makes you a bad person in RL

    Ag are hypocrites, the lot of them. We should always support the agenda that seeks to 're-educate' them. No ag left behind.

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  12. Spoiler alert:
    Ryan Abashion is 1LT Aldo Raine

    So he's "writing a report to his main" lmao
    Get wrecked AG

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    Replies
    1. best part was where he bragged on the previous post about burning a Talos to pop the wreck but we still got the loot. AG fails again.

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    2. Too funny, naw that was from the earlier gank, months ago, not the night before. There are two stories here, you may want to read over it again. It is funny how bent out of shape some of you guys get when having to reship into something bigger, tank, orbit, loose you loot, or loose your mach.

      For the record: Ryan is not my alt, I wish I could take credit for mainstreaming killing freighter and pod ganker scouts like he did. But that was totally him, and his killboard is totally his too.

      What's really funny is that there are about 3 other Aldo Raine's out there, and as many Inglorious Bastards all with different spellings (i.e. Bastard vs. Basterd in one case). This idea of hunting ganker scouts and has been around for a while in AG, but up until now no one has made it official. I was the lucky bastard that got the financial backing to see it through.

      Last night I did kill the loot, with Wolf in a looting freighter right on my heels. It was very dishonorable however when the wreck did not offer me an GF in local!

      I'm pretty sure that the wreck will probably wardec my corp, but as we all know that is about useless... we're a vigilante corp with mains in the HSM. Besides I've got so many killrights on me anyone can shoot me at anytime.

      Elite PVP yall! :P

      Delete
    3. So you steal other people's ideas? What a horrible carebear you are!

      Delete
    4. @Aldo Raine

      What a shame that you cannot validate and prove your wild-eyed and manic claims in the same calm and crisp manner that James 315 does, every day. All you can do is bloviate and belch boisterously, but yet, cannot provide a video of your claims, (as James 315 or any New Order Agent would do) in the absence of a killmail, which the wrecks that you "claim" to target would not produce.

      So pitable. So very dishonest. Such lack of sincerity or ambition. It's no wonder why you fall in with anti-ganking crowd, who fails daily.

      Delete
    5. After hanging out in the AG channel watching the shit they spew this is truly funny. Humanity... hahah gimmie a break.

      Delete
    6. @Aldo Raine

      On the Contrary, We are the ones who are bent upon saving Highsec residents from a fate worse than death; we save them from failing to live.

      Think about it this way: A miner does nothing. It sits in a belt, and the only thing that it does, and is capable of doing is pushing a button every so often. When its cargo hold is full, it warps to station, and repeats itself. What kind of challenge is there to this kind of gameplay? At what point does adrenaline enter its life, if it were not for the intervention of noble New Order Agents?

      You know, they say that EVE is a game of "95% boredom and 5% of pure adrenaline." Are you daring to say that you actually intend to rob players of that precious 5% that actually keeps the game fun, and people coming back day after day?

      Of course you do. You are an Anti-ganker. So full of hate and malice. So full of envy. And let's not forget, so powerless, to stop the Force of Good in this galaxy, known as The New Order and Its Glourious Leader, James 315.

      Such a pity you are, Mr. Raine. One can only hope that you manage to see the light sooner than your poor self-damned cohorts.

      Delete
    7. Aldo fail getting put in his place by ming tso. Priceless

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    8. @Aldo, honestly you're the only dude in this conversation that thinks he's not Ryan. pl0x git life
      ty ty <3

      Delete
  13. Ain't nobody gettin' away once 'ole Siggy got you bumped1

    ReplyDelete

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