Monday, January 25, 2016

The True Family of Highsec, Part 1

The word "family" means different things to different people. The New Order, certainly, is a family; it's the one family that truly counts in highsec. On occasion, that concept of a family must trump other potential definitions--sometimes in unexpected ways.
Liek DarZ > o/ How may I help you?
Jaroth Kings > tell me about this permit?
Liek DarZ > What would you like to know? Have you read the law already?
Jaroth Kings > tell me i dont have time to read stories
Jaroth Kings > 10 mil and i can mine for how long with out being popped
Those who hate the Code or attempt to minimize its influence would be surprised and disheartened to discover how often it's the miners themselves who approach our Agents. Jaroth Kings was a man in a hurry. He wanted to get the whole "permit" thing out of the way as quickly as possible.
Liek DarZ > No, sorry, it is not my job to cater to someon's laziness.
Liek DarZ > If you follow the rules, yes, you can keep mining then
Liek DarZ > The rules are given in the link above
Jaroth Kings > ok so i red the rulz now what?
Agent Liek DarZ was contacted by Jaroth. Liek tried to help the eager carebear as best he could. But he didn't indulge the miner unnecessarily. When needed, he showed firmness. Liek knew that although he could be a friend to the miner, he was also an authority figure.
Liek DarZ > if you want to follow them,
Liek DarZ > please send me 10m ISK, then I will send you your license
Jaroth Kings > and where do i put licence?
Liek DarZ > into the biography - the evemail will show how to
Jaroth Kings > sent
Liek DarZ > Then have a nice time and enjoy your permit!
Liek DarZ > Please read the evemail thoroughly - o7
Jaroth Kings > rgr
Liek had done Jaroth a huge favor. First, he'd sent him a link to a user-friendly restatement of the Code. Then he sold the miner a permit and sent him even more information about the Code via EVEmail.

Less than two hours later, Liek DarZ returned and killed the untanked miner. Liek had known there was something off about the guy. He checked up on Jaroth only to see what he'd feared: The miner had no intention of actually obeying the Code. Jaroth was basically a scammer, though I suppose in this case he was a scammer who gave money instead of taking it.
Liek DarZ > pls check local
Jaroth Kings > ?
Jaroth Kings > what do u calsssify as a ileagle vessel?
Liek DarZ > Why did you ignore my evemail's content?
Jaroth Kings > u serios
Jaroth sputtered in disbelief. And yet, if you examine his reaction closely, you'll notice that he immediately began asking about possible ways he'd broken the rules. He knew he wasn't innocent.
Liek DarZ > Did you read my evemail, as I asked you?
Jaroth Kings > that i did
Jaroth Kings > hangon a t1 barge is illeagle
Jaroth Kings > dont be gready?
Jaroth Kings > u serios?
The miner now resembled a student who claimed he'd done the reading assignment the night before--while hastily flipping through the pages in class the next day.
Liek DarZ > yes. The part about what ships to use.
Liek DarZ > And further up - the part about checking local?
Jaroth Kings > fucking usless
Liek DarZ > Oh. So you ignoring a personal warning for minutes AND ignoring two statements in an evemail makes anything useless but your behaviour?
Jaroth Kings > so i shall mine in a ibis then?
The miner's attitude became more and more sour. His cynicism grew.
Liek DarZ > Did you read the evemail maybe?
Jaroth Kings > i did
Liek DarZ > but why did you chose not to follow it?
Liek DarZ > In at least two regards?
Jaroth Kings > maybe cause i had othethings exept keep and eye on local
Agent-aspirants, take note! Liek didn't need to bully or torture Jaroth to get a confession out of him. He politely but directly questioned the miner's story. Before long, Jaroth admitted that he violated the Code.
Jaroth Kings > i saw warning, and just as i react u pop me
Liek DarZ > so you wilingly/knowingly/intentionally ignored what I wrote in the evemail?
Liek DarZ > Oh, and I wrote that warning several minutes ago in local
Jaroth Kings > dude... go and fornicate with a baboon
Jaroth Kings > simple as that
Jaroth Kings > heading off to wh, easier there
Having been exposed as a Code violator, the miner took off his mask: He was a Goofus.
Liek DarZ > See, you made a contract and then did not stick to the terms
Jaroth Kings > im paying to mine
Jaroth Kings > not just u but ccp aswell
Liek DarZ > "but for mining ships specifically it means to use a Procurer or Skiff - those emphasize tankiness over yield or laziness-inspiring large cargo holds. Please consider this information!"
Liek DarZ > I think that part is specific enough
Jaroth Kings > ??
Jaroth Kings > bla bla
The Goofus wasn't interested in being told what to do, no matter how essential the instructions were for his safety and the good of highsec. Jaroth terminated the convo.
Liek DarZ > o/
Jaroth Kings > o/
Liek DarZ > Have you had time to calm down and see where you brought that upon yourself really?
Jaroth Kings > dont bother
Jaroth Kings > heading out in a bit back to wh space
During their second attempt at a proper post-gank conversation, Jaroth made it known that he wasn't interested in getting better. He'd given up on highsec.
Liek DarZ > ah, sure, okay. Your call, you are free to leave CODE space
Jaroth Kings > i have a yr permit, so if i feel like coming back i will
Liek DarZ > No, it is not valid any longer now.
Jaroth Kings > fcking scammers u are
Liek DarZ > you knew about all the terms
Liek DarZ > You claimed you read everything, but did not actually do it?
Liek DarZ > Whose fault is that, again?
Jaroth Kings > myne for paying u in the first place
Jaroth Kings > its all good, heading back to wh
On what must be the slowest-ever journey to wormhole space, Jaroth repeated his cynical beliefs about the Code. If Jaroth were to be believed, this would be the last our Agent would see of the miner. Liek knew better. And our hero was determined to see justice done.

To be continued...


  1. Yep, heading off to WH space where CHODE. agents fear to tread.

    Smart move. Deny Jamey and his minions a target.

    1. As an Agent of the New Order who lives and patrols WH space looking for Permit Violators I can assure you that no place is safe. Your barge will die just the same, just means I don't need to gank to do it.

    2. @723
      Like you would know. How could you? You never even undock.

    3. @holedeal: There's one problem though, James himself has said that you don't need a permit unless you are in New Order territory, which is highsec. Wormhole space is not highsec, so the New Order has no jurisdiction there. With that in mind, why are you wasting resources enforcing the code in a place where there is no need to do so?

      Praise be to James 315 and the Holy Code.

    4. I've been mining in wormholes for 3+ years now and have yet to be killed by a CHODE. agent.

      What gives?

      Can all these CHODE. 'agents' who purport to patrol wormhole space please provide links to their killboards?

    5. Can you provide proof of your statement 331 chodeanon? No you cannot. It's all in your imagination. Liar.

      So to recap, chodeanon is not only slow, but a liar as well, and has no right to question the integrity of real EvE players.

      Try harder chodeanon, we know you can do it, after all, you are special remember?

  2. Yes to permit in the bio; No to tanked barge.

    That equals a gank.

    Sadly, justice was indeed done here.

  3. I'm sure his untanked retriever will be fine in WH space.

  4. Liek DarZ > The rules are given in the link above
    Jaroth Kings > ok so i red the rulz now what?

    I wish these had time stamps. I'd love to know how long it took Jaroth to "read" the Code.

  5. Will the real veers belvar please undock,January 25, 2016 at 9:54 PM

    Please undock
    Please undock

    See wat i did there?

  6. I think they're quite enjoying high sec actually. Can't imagine why they'd leave when they're having this much fun.

    I hope to join them one day soon...

  7. Yeah right, well James if you want to call a bunch of tightly knit inbreds family go on right ahead. Otherwise heres some free advice, don't continue down this path.

    1. You would know Nathan, you south florida redneck. So your mom is your sister and your brother is your dad? Sounds like south Florida. Fat rednecks in trailer homes living off government handouts. Hello Bellview Fla.

      This is your shitty little LLC is it not?

      I see you finally dissolved it. What a tard thinking that you could live off CCP's efforts.

      Why the fuk are you even here Nathan? You dont EvE anymore, you are not part of any special interest EvE group, and no one (not CODE or AG or CCP) wants you here. Asshole.

      Did you even watch your own videos on youtube? The ones where you rock to and fro like a window licker while spouting some bullshit about player retention and 'morality'?

      This is you right?
      Tell us again how EvE 'saved your life in real life'. What a dumbass.

      Have you ever learned to spell 'thread'? You inbred redneck fuck. You do know that no matter how many times you misspell it, it will always be 'tHread', right?

      We do love laughing at you though, we just dont want your retarded rl shit in our game.

    2. It's alright, papa will wipe away thos tears for you and make it all better. Just send me 4.99 by check.

  8. Wolf, you need new material. Or is this your way to agitate the anti-gankers?

    Praise be to James 315 and the Holy Code.

    Amen brother.

    1. @Anon9:30

      The New Order creates new content daily, as is evidenced by This blog, and its incredible New Order Agents.

      It is only the carebears who have nothing to contribute... but failure. Every day, it seems.

    2. Look, even most of us who are in favor of the Code think his posts are an embarrassment. 90% of them are spamming the same thing whether or not James posts have anything to do with AG.

      He looks for all intents exactly like the wanna-be trolls who can't think of anything other than the same tired old "Ming, why don't you undock" or "Meh, seems made up" lines.

      I'm willing to accept he's good at blowing up carebears based on James' reports, but that doesn't excuse such inane shitposting.

    3. @Ming Tso

      Fit your cat:

    4. @Anon 2:47

      You mean you believe Wolf to be an embarrassment on the level of Anon2:49, my personal pet of whom I have trolled hard enough to have a vendetta against me?

    5. @Ming: To be honest, yes. It's very difficult to tell the difference between the post above me and Wolf's. It's unoriginal drivel the OTHER side is supposed to be engaging in.

      I swear this is not a "GRR CODE" post in disguise, I love what you guys do for the game but every time he posts I wince at how he's dragging you down.

    6. Actually there is a difference. Fit your cat guy knows how to use his shift key correctly.

    7. Well what do you expect Loyal ignores his kids so he can blow up internet freighters. you aren't going to get a well rounded person there.

    8. @Anon4:53

      Your comment doesn't make any sense. Plus Fit Your Cat guy doesn't know how to properly use hyperlinks. Or even link to the correct site. Which are, unarguably, two more examples of Anti-Ganking failing daily!

    9. it your cat:

  9. Hey now anon208
    Calm down miner.
    CODE Agents leave hisec all the time to protect and secure other areas of space, or just to practice shooting stuff.

    You have it back to front there friend, YOU should leave hisec if you have a conflict with the CODE or any of it's Agents. As there is no place for your whining and sperging in hisec. Buh bye now.

  10. "The miner had no intention of actually obeying the Code. Jaroth was basically a scammer, though I suppose in this case he was a scammer who gave money instead of taking it."



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