Sunday, August 26, 2018

Kills of the Week


Nobody cares.

What people do care about is the Code, and how its enforcement has led to the downfall of some very wicked bot-aspirants. So enough with Aura's nonsense. Let's check out some amazing elite PvP from the week of August 19th @ 00:00 EVEtime through August 25th @ 23:59 EVEtime:



Atlantic Systems corp learned a terrible lesson about solo PvP when its entire fleet of shuttles and pods was simultaneously incinerated by a single Code enforcer, Agent holdmybeer. Normally, we would name a single carebear and then list a bunch of gankers who contributed to the kill. This time, it's the other way around. The ganked carebears were Psycho Warrior, Pussys Galore, d0cToR DeaTh, Vinny Gambini, Madd Scientist, Valentine Zukovsk, and Sex Doctor.


Incredibly, the group of seven shuttles were all autopiloting together like a school of brain-dead fish. What was the point of that? Did they think they had safety in numbers if they autopiloted in one big group, rather than trickling through the stargates one after another? Regardless, each shuttle contained a half-billion isk pod, until holdmybeer tore through those, too.


Smartbombs. Gotta love 'em.



What happens when an AFK jump freighter with ORE cargo expanders runs into the Kusions and the Tax Collectors? For ddysy, the answer was absolute destruction. In an instant, he lost 33.2 billion isk, right in the heart of Jita.

Agents Taxman Daniel, Tax Collector HongMei, Joel Kusion, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector Stroheim, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Jayden Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Jason Kusion, Tax Collector Max, Tax Collector BokChoy, Jake Kusion, Tax Collector Hill, Justin Kusion, Tax Collector Aruka, Jayson Kusion, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector Kittens, Jeremiah Kusion, Tax Collector Larry, Johnathan Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Tax Collector AynRand, Australian Excellence, Joseph Kusion, Tax Collector Alison, HSM Fleet Admiral, HSM Chief PettyOfficer, and HSM MasterChief PettyOfficer brought a tremendous fleet of Taloses into the field (and yes, a pair of stately Moas). The battle was won. Was the lesson learned? Ah, that's the question.



An hour later, Nistel Hakaari brought her own (even more expensive!) ORE-equipped jump freighter into Jita. It was thoroughly AFK, and I doubt Nistel ever even considered buying a New Order mining permit. And so, on the very same stargate where ddysy lost 33.2 billion isk--his wreck wasn't even cold yet--Nistel lost 43.9 billion of her own isk.

Agents Joseph Kusion, Tax Collector HongMei, Tax Collector Hill, Tax Collector Richard, Taxman Daniel, Jackson Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Joel Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Tax Collector Kittens, Jeremiah Kusion, Tax Collector BokChoy, Justin Kusion, Tax Collector Aruka, Tax Collector Max, Joshua Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Jason Kusion, Tax Collector Stroheim, Jake Kusion, Tax Collector AynRand, brainlet, Australian Excellence, HSM MasterChief, HSM Fleet Admiral, and HSM Chief PettyOfficer take their job seriously. They are Agents of the New Order--and agents of fate, as well.



We all know about ORE Strip Miners and ORE Ice Harvesters, but did you know that there are also ORE mining lasers, simply called "ORE Miners"? I suppose even Venture pilots need to have ways of losing a bunch of money for no reason. Aaryian corran took full advantage of the opportunity by blinging his mining frigate up to half a billion isk. Agent Anyanka Funk took advantage, too, popping the Venture with a simple Thrasher. Anyanka's was the more cost-efficient opportunity, I'd say.

Aaryian wasn't done losing stuff. The AFK miner's 1.6 billion isk pod hovered in place until 17 minutes later, when Anyanka's criminal timer expired and she paid him another visit.



Speaking of ORE Strip Miners, Ashya Anninen slapped a pair of them on her Hulk and pretty much called it a day. She didn't feel like fully equipping her ship. What a low-energy miner! Agents Max August Zorn, Augustus De Morgan, Ernst Steinitz, and Niels Henrik Abel felt differently--energized by the awesome motivating power of the Code. So our Agents did what came naturally: They killed the miner and commanded her to obey the Code.



Gaclaw Ongrard lost a Hulk of his own. Unfortunately for Gaclaw, he was also carrying a pod with 2.9 billion isk worth of implants at the time. When the pod appeared, Agent Alt 00 made a split-second decision, judging that Gaclaw deserved to lose his pod for violating the Code.


As always, our Agent's decision proved to be the right one. The pod concealed a set of mining implants, including a Michi's Excavation Augmentor. If only Michi would sell mining permits instead.

11 comments:

  1. Great stuff, keep it up everyone!
    #abolishmichi

    -Galaxy Pig

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  3. CODE. always wins!

    ReplyDelete
  4. "Alt 00 July 21, 2018 at 12:09 AM
    It is neither glitch, nor exploit. Fortuitously Alt 00, in her infinite compassion, is willing to teach you how to execute this manoeuvre."


    I enjoy making shitters so mad they post ignorant crap without thinking.

    This one was one of my favorites.

    Partly because he's just another highsec miner by nature.

    And partly because I'm wired that way.

    But mostly because highsec shitters deserve it.

    The Code always wins!

    Always!

    Anything else is heresy, and ignorance.

    #fortuitouslybrolol

    #brodoyouevenenglish

    #Iawaityourtearsbro

    #brocabulary

    #brocephus

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