Friday, August 10, 2018

Over One Trillion Six Hundred Two Billion in Shares Sold

There are so many reasons to buy New Order stock...


There are plenty of non-stock related reasons to send me isk, too.


...Then there are those who satisfy multiple motives by sending me isk. (And yes, MinerBumping shall always celebrate its top supporters each month.)


Aha! Another responsible corporate citizen.

Now let's get to the Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™ portion of today's post. Aiko Danuja's stock purchase was modest--just 20 shares. Yet Aiko's timing was impeccable. Those 20 shares took us past the 1,602 billion isk mark and earned Aiko a Supreme Protector's Tip of the Hat™. If you can't be rich, you can at least be lucky.


BONUS!


I received a field report from Agent Grixer Noxtlus (who also purchased shares this week, by the way). Grixer is a member of Division 315, one of the countless Code enforcement corporations that operate independently of the mighty CODE. alliance.


After Grixer ganked Sonoh Keenay's Retriever, the miner began to cry in local, drawing the attention of bystanders in the Bashyam system. Sonoh didn't learn her lesson. Instead, she doubled-down, undocking an Orca and immediately returning to the asteroid belt where she'd been ganked.


Sonoh soon found herself in trouble again. Grixer looted some of Sonoh's wrecks, triggering a suspect flag; Sonoh retaliated by opening fire. As Grixer was now legally permitted to return fire, he re-shipped while Agent Kanid Fett kept the Orca bump-tackled.


To Sonoh's consternation, Agent Kanid was assisted by Maz Thara, a random onlooker who joined the bumping party. Some people know a good thing when they see it.


Grixer returned with a Hurricane Fleet Issue and destroyed Sonoh's Orca and 770 million isk pod.


It's unclear why an Orca pilot had been using a Retriever to begin with. Perhaps Sonoh didn't want to risk an Orca while an Agent of the New Order was in local. Regardless, I think we can all agree that mining without a permit is always a bad idea, no matter who is in the system. Our Agents are everywhere--and their numbers are growing.

19 comments:

  1. Sonoh Keenay, you lost a Retriever, Orca, and a +5 learning pod to a pack of dogs. If dogs can beat you what does that make you? What's lower than a dog? It's a case of talk shit get hit, miner. You still owe Agent Noxtlus 10m for your permit. It should be no trouble now that your wallet is filled with default insurance.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sonoh also owes a GF and a written apology to James 315, praise His name.

      Delete
    2. Meh, that shitter will shardani and quit soon anyway. EVE is not kind to idiots, that's why there are so many pissed-off highsec carebears.

      Delete
    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    4. I think you want the next floor down, miner.

      Lol made you post carelessly.

      Delete
  2. "Alt 00 21, 2018 at 12:09 AM
    It is neither glitch, nor exploit. Fortuitously Alt 00, in her infinite compassion, is willing to teach you how to execute this manoeuvre."



    Ha! Did you guys hear the one about the highsec carebear-turned-"ganker" that started making wild, unsubstantiated claims about their superior abilities? Stop me if you've heard this; three highsec shitters are drinking at a planet side rooftop bar, this old ganker down at the end of the bar suddenly jumps up and dashes over to the roof's edge and leaps out into the into the dark. The three shitters wait with baited breath, anticipating the sound of an old ganker's death as he slams into the concrete sidewalk, 30 floors below. To their suprise, the old ganker is suddenly blown back over the edge of the building by a strong updraft, depositing him back on his feet in the middle of the bar, to the cheers of the regular patrons.

    The carebears can't believe their eyes! The old ganker has just survived guaranteed death, and to the applause of the local crowd. The highsec shitters decide they have to know what is going on so they "causally" saunter down to the end of the bar and find an opening near the old ganker. "Excuse me sir!" The carebears tug at the gankers sleeve, "can you explain what just happened?".

    "Don't you carebears know anything about planet side updraft mechanics?" The old ganker replies with a grin, "well hell son, it's simple; the effect of this building being heated by this planet's 46 hour day creats an updraft that has ultra-positive lift on hot summer days. You would have to try to do a header into the ground to even make it down all the way, when you wanna come back up, just spread your arms like a bird and here you are."

    The carebears at this point are sure the old ganker is using some anti-grav shenanigans and try to call bullshit, but the old ganker just laughs and does a repeat of his earlier performance, three more times. The highsec shitters are finally convinced that the old ganker is telling the truth, and that they are ready to stop acting like cowardly carebears and take the plunge. So they run to the edge and jump, at 8 feet per second per second, the carebears go SPLAT on the concrete sidewalk below. The crowd on the roof erupts in hysterical laughter at the stupidity of the silly carebears, and as the old ganker sits back down at his favorite barstool, the bartender leans in and says:

    "Ha! 'Planet side updraft mechanics', you sure are a mean drunk, Superalt00!"



    Always!




    ReplyDelete
  3. I think you would benefit from a psychiatric assessment.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Replies
    1. "Alt 00 21, 2018 at 12:09 AM
      It is neither glitch, nor exploit. Fortuitously Alt 00, in her infinite compassion, is willing to teach you how to execute this manoeuvre."


      At least I didn't fold like a sheet and go make a profile. What a shitter. He just don't get it.

      Delete
    2. Bullshit, he read every word of it, twice.

      Do you miners ever think before you post? Is it really that hard to NOT lie daily?

      Always!

      Delete
  5. Lol made you use an account

    ReplyDelete
  6. "Alt 00 21, 2018 at 12:09 AM
    It is neither glitch, nor exploit. Fortuitously Alt 00, in her infinite compassion, is willing to teach you how to execute this manoeuvre."

    ReplyDelete
  7. "Alt 00 21, 2018 at 12:09 AM
    It is neither glitch, nor exploit. Fortuitously Alt 00, in her infinite compassion, is willing to teach you how to execute this manoeuvre."


    Fortuitously? Lol

    ReplyDelete
  8. Meh seems made up

    ReplyDelete
  9. Is Johnny piddle actually the fake Karma balancer and Ralliana? Would make sense, takes a lot of autism to be that committed to false flagging.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wow I Can't Believe one trillion six hundred two shares are solded and how much worth of one share is ??

    ReplyDelete
  11. Aiko is a fucking BITCH that cunt whore motherfucking stole all my shit wtf goddamn it

    ReplyDelete

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