Sunday, May 12, 2019

Kills of the Week

Carebears, it's time to wake up--time to get real. You tried running around highsec without a permit, and it didn't work. You failed. You got ganked. Then you got ganked again. This time, do things the right way--the Code way. Otherwise, you'll end up repeating the failures of Gobloks like these, from the week of May 5th @ 00:00 EVEtime through May 11th @ 23:59 EVEtime...



Some miners tank up to encourage gankers to seek softer targets. Then there's miners like Sweetbear Bloodbear, who bling up instead of tanking up. What happens to them? Here's an easy-to-remember slogan: If you bling up, you'll get blown up. Agents Jack Van Impre, Piz Caldera, Blowtorch Betty, Lewak, Pod-Goo A-GoGo, and Eva Mavas were perfectly happy to kill Sweetbear and confiscate her contraband.



Zonja Vjeter had a different strategy. Sure, she packed her ship with billions worth of cargo. That wasn't smart. But the centerpiece of Zonja's defense system was to anti-tank her ship as much as possible. I mean, we wouldn't want our gankers to have to chew through too many hitpoints, right? Agents Araena Calorne, Lucia, and Eva Mavas shook their heads in disapproval, and then they did their duty for highsec.



Purustaja is living proof that there are still people who think battles are won with isk. She spent as much money as possible on her combat ship, thinking it would improve her odds in a fight. Battles aren't won with money, though--they're won with the Code. Agents Eva Mavas, Blowtorch Betty, Araena Calorne, and Lucia had quite a week, blapping yet another bling-boat.



By now, everyone should know that taking an unlicensed jump freighter into Jita is a foolish, reckless thing to do. Laura Humphrey either didn't know, or she didn't care. But the mighty CODE. alliance believes in law and order. And so justice was done. Agents Tax Collector Richard, Pod Destroyer Molly, Taxman Daniel, Tax Collector HongMei, Australian Excellence, Tax Collector Kittens, Tax Collector Aruka, Justin Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Johnathan Kusion, Joel Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Tax Collector BokChoy, Tax Collector Max, Joseph Kusion, Jason Kusion, Jake Kusion, Joshua Kusion, and Succulent Spodumain, Homoerotic Finger Painting, and FidgetSpinning MyApendages taught the filthy carebear a 16.3 billion isk lesson.

But they were far from finished.



Mesushi brought an even more expensive jump freighter into the Jita neighborhood: 24.3 billion isk! It seemed as though she crammed every conceivable piece of cargo into her ship. One thing she lacked: A New Order mining permit. And without it, her ship was as good as dead. Agents Jeremiah Kusion, Justin Kusion, Tax Collector Kittens, Joel Kusion, Jason Kusion, Taxman Daniel, Joseph Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Tax Collector HongMei, Australian Excellence, Tax Collector Richard, Jackson Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Jake Kusion, Jacob Kusion, Josh Kusion, Pod Destroyer Molly, Jeremy Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Tax Collector Max, Jeffery Kusion, Jared Kusion, Tax Collector Aruka, Jaiden Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Homoerotic Finger Painting, FidgetSpinning MyApendages, and Succulent Spodumain sent in a massive fleet of Taloses to take her down.



What is this, Burn Jita? Demiurge Sabezan topped the two previous jump freighters by losing 25.8 billion isk in Jita. It would seem that this was a particularly bad weekend to be a bot-aspirant in highsec's biggest trade hub. They should've known better. Every system in highsec is policed by the most elite PvP'ers in the game. Yet again, a Talos fleet brought ludicrous DPS into the field: Agents Cesaro, Tax Collector HongMei, Australian Excellence, Jason Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Taxman Daniel, Jeremiah Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Tax Collector Aruka, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector Max, Jackson Kusion, Justin Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector Kittens, Jake Kusion, Joel Kusion, Dead Black Whale, FidgetSpinning MyApendages, Homoerotic Finger Painting, and Succulent Spodumain.

It's getting ugly out there, carebears. A few words of advice:

Comply or die.
No permit, no ship.
Get right with the Code or get rekt!

3 comments:

  1. If anyone actually read the hisec militia blog, we might be able to find out where anti-ganking was when these miners were getting rekt.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Meh seems made up

    ReplyDelete
  3. But where oh where is CHODEanon?

    ReplyDelete

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